Couch 202: The Grande Unicorn Frappuccino couch.

Aug 06, 2019, 11:50 AM

Saturday night I had that big fantastical dream that I'm using to create a story from, which is carrying me away every time I sit down to work on it. Sunday night was just a weird dream which is hard to explain with words so I'm still attempting to draw it.

Aug 06, 2019, 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

I feel depressed today and want to SH. I see T on Friday so I'm trying to tell myself that I can make it until then, and also keeping her opinion in my head that I'm not giving something up by giving up SH but that I'm gaining something (it would help if that something is concrete but I don't think it is). Definitely wanted to just stay home today and stay in bed but I made myself get up and come to work. Sometimes having depression sucks because everything is a fight with myself. Fight to get up. Fight to come to work. Fight to have motivation to work. Etc.

I clicked the wrong button I meant to click quote. On Tapatalk. Please consider my "like" a hug.

I am sorry it's such a rough day. Can you find some time today to do something nice for yourself? Hugs.

feralkittymom · Aug 06, 2019, 11:57 AM

I don't know much about smoking. Is it better to use a rub than a more liquid/sticky marinade? Or does the marinating happen first and is wiped off before smoking? I'm more of a roasting/grilling cook.

Elio · Aug 06, 2019, 12:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

Possible trigger:

Have you tried smacking it?

That's one of my hardware solutions (and used to be how I could fix copier at a former workplace!)

Quote:

Originally Posted by NP_Complete

Just a thought, but check your USB port. My wired keyboard quit working a few weeks ago until I changed the port it was plugged into.

Yep, tried the force into behavior method.

USB Mouse still works, but yeah I did try the different usb port

I switched out the batteries, first thing. I think I even tried it on a different computer at the time it died. It's been sitting here dead for like a year or more.

WarmFuzzySocks · Aug 06, 2019, 01:23 PM

I dreamt that I was trying to put out a forest fire. All I had were two stainless steel bowls from my kitchen and a creek, so I was walking back and forth carefully carrying water in a bowl from the creek to the fire.

SlumberKitty · Aug 06, 2019, 01:30 PM

Oh my gosh I'm so depressed, I feel like I'm drowning in sadness.

SlumberKitty · Aug 06, 2019, 01:32 PM

T would probably ask...what's behind the sadness? Oh I don't know. More sadness.

03:23 PM

(Deleted a bunch of stupid whining)

Aug 06, 2019, 01:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

T would probably ask...what's behind the sadness? Oh I don't know. More sadness.

Hugs...

Aug 06, 2019, 01:51 PM

I’m taking the tots to the swim club so I can just sit on a chair while they splash in the baby pool. Hopefully sitting in the sun for an hour will lighten my mood and help with my anxiety. I’m not at the point where it’s crippling...it’s heading there though.. I need find a way to calm myself.

Aug 06, 2019, 03:20 PM

Hugs Jersey.

Aug 06, 2019, 04:36 PM

I woke up feeling very young and have had several internal tantrums and my D is being a bit tardy getting ready for school and the dog is all snuggly and feel it working up into anger and it feels like a control thing like something is a threat and if I can just keep everything under control it will be alright. My exT was good with this **** and I can't quite remember how he did it.

SlumberKitty · Aug 06, 2019, 04:41 PM

Argh. Depression has turned into Suicidal Idealation. Today I feel like I am hanging on by my fingernails just trying to make it through the day without falling into crisis. I feel so much heaviness on my chest like I can't even breathe.

StressedMess · Aug 06, 2019, 06:02 PM

Hugs and head-nods all around. I'm forcing myself to adult today but it's a struggle. I did go to work although I wanted to stay home. I did go grocery shopping although I wanted fast food. I will cook dinner instead of snacking. And hopefully I'll sleep well tonight since all those activities tired me out.

downandlonely · Aug 06, 2019, 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Argh. Depression has turned into Suicidal Idealation. Today I feel like I am hanging on by my fingernails just trying to make it through the day without falling into crisis. I feel so much heaviness on my chest like I can't even breathe.

Can you call someone? Your therapist or a hotline?

daisydid · Aug 06, 2019, 06:10 PM

In an interesting turn of events, it looks like H and I are going to buy a house. We're just starting to look now and I'm already stressed about it.

SlumberKitty · Aug 06, 2019, 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by downandlonely

Can you call someone? Your therapist or a hotline?

When I get off work in about 20 minutes, I'm going to tell my parents. If they think I need to go to the hospital then I will do that but I don't think I need to go to the hospital bc right now its just thoughts. But if I do go to the hospital, I will call the exchange and ask them to tell my T where I went. The hospital will take care of calling my PDOC. Thank you for caring. HUGS Kit

Aug 06, 2019, 06:11 PM

Hugs and headnods all around from me as well.

Working on my story from the dream the other night and all I have so far is a page and a half of notes. I think I need to do an Active Imagination with the dream and ask the main character to tell me her story...

Aug 06, 2019, 06:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

Argh. Depression has turned into Suicidal Idealation. Today I feel like I am hanging on by my fingernails just trying to make it through the day without falling into crisis. I feel so much heaviness on my chest like I can't even breathe.

Hugs Kit. Stay safe. I hope your parents are helpful when you call them. Keep posting if it helps too there is almost always somebody here....

SlumberKitty · Aug 06, 2019, 06:17 PM

Thank you @ArtieSwimsOn

Aug 06, 2019, 06:22 PM

Oh couch fiction writers... I usually write very personal poetry so this doesn't matter with my poems, but... for stories? How do you know you're not just reinventing somebody else's wheel?! I mean I feel like this dream I had that I'm making notes for a story from - is turning into some archetypal kind of story and it's probably been told a million times. Is it even worth writing? I wish I hadn't had to drop that class last summer. I might know the answer if I'd been able to finish it!