Couch 206: The Hersilia Couch

I managed to file my taxes from my sickbed, so that's something. (I'd applied to defer them.)

Hope you feel better soon. Could you open some windows, at least get some of the nice weather inside?

I wish I was having my normal session today.

The 4 year old at work just had a 1/2 hour of such impulsive behavior and I couldn’t get him to stop. He’s now in his room and I’m not sure it was the right decision but redirecting, warnings and trying to get him to tell me what’s happening for him wasn’t working. I feel like a monster for putting in his room but I didn’t know what else to do.

I am sitting through an incredibly boring Zoom meeting. But since I Zoomed in, I could multitask and finish off the grading for my first-half course. Phew, all over but the complaining about grades!

Now I have time I'm taking a psych course on "Mindful Eating." It's two credits only and of course all I have to do is write about my feeeeeelings. Piece o' cake.

NP, maybe you could do something self-caring at the usual session time? Walk, massage, facial, something like that?

ETA: Jersey, I survived a childhood of being sent to my room. He'll live.

A mindful eating course where you have to write about your feelings? You don’t say.

I’m thinking maybe I should have handled the kids impulse episode by removing his sister and brother instead of removing him. Take them to another room while he stayed Where he was and worked out whatever needing working out.

I said the same thing to therapist every time she tried to make herself feel good by taking credit for something she had no part in.
(the last minute or so when they are at the therapist)

Why should they be punished for his behavior, though? Because that's what it might look like to them. And to him it might seem a reward for acting out.

Isn't he safer in his room, too?

I think if I explained to the 3 year old that it’s not a time out for her she would get it. The infant wouldn’t know. I don’t know if he’s safer in his room than the living room. When my sisters now teenager son was a preschooler when he would act out the school would remove the other kids from the classroom to let him finish what he needed to do. That’s where I got the idea from.

As a teacher, we generally despise this technique. It is completely disruptive of the teaching environment for every other student in the classroom, not to mention how our classrooms sometimes are allowed to be entirely destroyed by the out of control student. It's a horrible policy educationally. I have a real problem with the "needs" of one student trumping the needs of 20-30 others.

Teachers sounding the alarm over ‘room clear’ method

I don’t really know how the teachers felt about it 12 years ago. He’s 16 now. He was Autistic and ADHD in a main stream classroom so maybe that’s what they thought would be better back then. He didn’t get a one on one aide until 1st grade.

It really wasn't as common a technique 12 years ago. At that point, special ed teachers were generally trained in safe restraint and allowed to do so for the safety of all involved. Now, in our litigious world, clear the room policies have taken over as restraint is not allowed, leaving entire classrooms full of teachers and other students the education victims of advocacy for the one. I have teacher friends who are routinely spat at, hit, their rooms destroyed, because lawyers are running the show, and funding has been so cut back that getting the number a paras needed to monitor these volatile children is difficult.

There has to be a middle ground. Not every child needs to be mainstreamed into the general population. May not be a popular viewpoint, but I've see too many students who are unable to successfully mainstream, leaving actual education on the back-burner to the rights of a single student because that student is entirely disruptive. Other students deserve a calmer, safer, educationally focused environment where teachers can teach rather than spend all of their time managing the behaviors of one student.

Sorry: Off my soapbox.

And now im feeling very low energy. I dont think i overdid it yesterday, but today is definitely going to be an easier day. If i listed the things i did yesterday, they are a LOT more than my usual "i did one thing"! Usually i am excited that i take out the boxes. I did like 6 things yesterday. I SHOULD be exhausted. I even did new things that im not used to counting!

That sounds like such a difficult situation, Jersey. I'm sorry you're having to deal with it.

Boy, like mother, like daughter! I would love to see sheldons moms real granny. I mean, i know they are "acting", but that was a real moment.

Lawyers are your friend. I don't disagree about the one child should not disrupt an entire classroom and certainly not all children should be mainstreamed - I completely agree with that. I do disagree that it is lawyers who caused the problem or are the ones running the show - I blame parents and educators who looked to lawyers for implementation and enforcement of the insane ideas that come out of education administrators who have often (in my limited professional experience and from having a lot of friends who are teachers in elementary and middle schools) never spent time in a classroom. Parents are the most culpable in my opinion. I have been in guardianships of minors turning 18 - and the absolutely nutball ideas they have about what the school should be doing (and it is completely at the expense of other children learning) has often astonished me.

It's really trivial and i shouldn't get that upset over it.
T and I talked about it this morning. How I'm expecting him to care when he obviously doesn't. Yet he thinks he has the right to make me stop because it's been dangerous lately (and in the past a few times).

An earlier appointment opened up this Wednesday for my pcp so I rescheduled my appointment for then. Shes supposed to write a letter for my school for disability so hopefully it goes over okay. I managed through this course even with being in the hospital but I definitely need something in writing just in case.

I don't even recall what you are talking about. I just saw the end where the mother tells the therapist he doesn't get credit for it.

Lawyers are not our friend in this instance. They are not educators but we are at the whim of their opinions. Educational practice constantly concedes to the opinions and advice of lawyers anymore. Any threat of being sued, and all sound educational practice goes out the window. Districts have an army of lawyers making far too many decisions anymore. We'll have to disagree.

We usually do. Although here, I was actually trying to show sympathy for the classroom teacher.
But the lawyers only advise - it is the cowardice of the administrators to fear litigation. Or one could look to the legislators to change the laws.

You watched the young sheldon clip but not this? - watch this - it has subtitles - it really is a great loving speech. Plus the Prince is very emotional - I expect you would like such a thing. And I now have a crush on Princess Mary.

The reality of litigation is it is costly, further taking funds away from districts that are already strapped. It isn't cowardice; it's the path of financial least resistance; it's the reality. Sure, they can fight the legal battles, spend a buttload of money, possibly still lose anyway and have to implement more costly interventions. People don't realize how much of education is run by legislatures (who aren't educators) and the lawyers paid to enforce the legislatures' insane mandates/laws that aren't educationally sound. School districts have to make financial priorities, and dumping more money into the legal process just isn't feasible all the time. When our educators do stand up to the legal system, they are chastised by our governors and legislators who put people in charge who are further removed from education and are hell bent on undermining our public educational system with privatized charter schools, etc. It's a mess. I have no positive opinion of anyone in the legal system being in charge of public educational decisions. It's out of hand.