Couch 216: The Baseball Couch

I would guess it's okay.

Fires are terrifying hugs to people who are experiencing them

I just asked my T if he's willing to share the name of the extermination company he uses, as he mentioned having a regular contract with one for ants and that he's had mouse issues at times, too. Is that crossing some sort of weird boundary line? I said I'd completely understand if he preferred not to tell me and that I wouldn't take it to mean anything. But this is making me wonder, is it OK to ask a T about stuff like that? I'd never hesitate to ask a friend or relative, if we were discussing the topic. Ugh, the therapeutic relationship is so weird....

You missed a period. Eats shoots and leaves.

i dunno, it totally works the way it is written for where i am, the fires are in the mountains that kinda 'hug' the city and they are terrifying if you're up close to them...

I would think that's totally okay but my T and I have a very simple and uncomplicated relationship (I mean we've never had a rupture - we don't discuss the therapeutic relationship - we talk for our hour a week and move on). I cannot imagine this would be any invasion of privacy to ask for a recommendation such as this.

Not discussing the therapeutic relationship sounds like heaven to me.

And, conversely, discussing the therapeutic relationship is hell.

Hey couch, I updated my thread on the romantic subforum and would love feedback if anyone is willing. I hope everyone’s doing well!

Yes they are. Stay safe.

Dr. T says I've come to strike a nice balance in talking about the therapeutic relationship. Where at one point (last summer particularly), it seemed to be more focused on that, on the here and now of the relationship, rather than on other stuff. While now, when the relationship comes up, it tends to be more in a way that's tied into other things, whether my childhood, anxiety, etc. Though I do feel like this may in part be *him* coming to realize that reactions I have to him aren't all about him but are (usually) about bigger issues that affect other parts of my life. And that originate in places other than him. Like he took a course in transference and countertransference or something.


In exterminator (I keep wanting to say "terminator") news, it's possible our condo association could cover the costs. They requested a work order be sent to this one company. We're in townhouses, and it's kind of complicated, where the condo association deals with stuff in the outside structure of the house, while we're responsible for inside, So when the wind blew the exhaust chimney off the house years ago, they replaced it. But when we had a plumbing leak inside, that was on us. So I guess if the mice are coming in from outside (we're an end unit), it could possibly be their responsibility? If that's the case, I'm not complaining! I mean, good our condo fee gets used for something...

I’m having Twizzlers for dinner. Because I’m a fully functioning adult that definitely isn’t depressed. Yep. 100% okay.

I am trying to ring the guidance counsellor but usually to use the phone i have to be drunk or stoned. I managed to phone but she wasnt in her office so i will try after lunch

Had to look up Twizzlers. Yum!

They’re delicious and low in calories. Win win.

I'm pretty sure that's what L was trying to get me to see last week when she suggested I 'follow the bread crumbs', see what it reminds me of, let my whole being feel it and find where it's coming from. I did that, and I know now why it reared its ugly head again, and I don't want to talk about it with her anymore!

(that word "reared" looks so strange just now. I keep reading it as two words that sound like "re red" haha)

Ok rang the guidance counsellor , could feel myself dissociating, havent done that since i left therapy. Got an interview with the deputy principal in Thursday. Hoping i dont fully dissociate as schools really trigger me. I cant remember going to any of my girls parent teacher nights

There’s a new quarantine game on Twitter: your Kentucky Derby horse name is your latest mental health symptom + the last thing you ate.

So I guess you’re Depressed Twizzler. I am Anxious Apple.

ETA: Make that Anxious Rotten Apple.

Recent research shows that masks are better at reducing the droplet load coming from a person who is aerosling. So your masks protect other people from you, and vice versa.

People can dine in now in my country so all the food places near my new place are chock full of people eating close by at tables... Ugh no thanks.

About the fireworks in the USA, I heard one theory that it's cops doing "psy ops" so people will be too tired to protest? My chosen sibling in NYC says it's been ireworks every night for three weeks until around 4am.

In my country we arent encouraged to wear masks our only instructions are to keep 1.5 metres from people and wash our hands frequently.

Really missing talking to exT i am obviously choosing to ignore the way he terminated me.

Obsessing Grits?

Hi Couch,

I thought I'd pass this along. I find it really helpful.

H wants me to go with him to his therapy session tomorrow. He has a new T and has only seen her a few times. I went once with him to his old T. I personally wouldn't want to have him tag along to any of my sessions, but I think he's thinking it'll help him out since he messed up big time.

Hugs if wanted, SheHulk. Is H's therapist trained in domestic violence therapy for perpetrators?

It doesn't make any sense that he wants to bring you to therapy. In DV programs in my country, the victims (spouse, kids) never get involved in the perpetrator's therapy though they are in therapy too.