What do therapists want from clients?

Omers · Jul 20, 2020, 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by susannahsays

This would strike me as condescending - like the therapist thinks I'm so sick that I don't have agency over my own actions and must be treated like an infant. Honestly, it would feel insulting to me to be told that the therapist would "contain" sexual harassment and physical assault on my part. I really don't understand how allowing a client to assault him or attempt to assault him translates to having a boundary and it would be hard for me to respect a therapist who is ok with being treated that way.

The one I see is very receptive to my anger, but physically assaulting her would definitely be a deal-breaker.

I think by “contain” he does mean block or stop the behavior but he would not want to make the client feel ashamed. He isn’t suggesting he would just sit there and tolerate or allow it but he would not terminate therapy over it unless it was ongoing. I think the problem is more in my bungled attempt to explain what he means than in him not having boundaries. He certainly isn’t OK with a client doing those things to him.

LonesomeTonight · Jul 20, 2020, 08:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Omers

I think by “contain” he does mean block or stop the behavior but he would not want to make the client feel ashamed. He isn’t suggesting he would just sit there and tolerate or allow it but he would not terminate therapy over it unless it was ongoing. I think the problem is more in my bungled attempt to explain what he means than in him not having boundaries. He certainly isn’t OK with a client doing those things to him.

My T has also said he wouldn't terminate over the trying to seduce him thing, that it would be something we'd have to talk about, and he'd say it wasn't OK. As for physically threatening him, he's said the only time he's terminated a client is when they physically threatened him, to the point that he called the police. I could never see myself physically threatening him though, as I'm a flight or freeze person.

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What do therapists want from clients?

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