[emmaleemochizuki]

Ok so it might just be I'm still too young and I'm childish around this.

But I find it too weird to talk about relationships with my T? like because I have never talked about it?

to her knowledge I have never even been in a serious romantic relationship.

I just started uni. And have been asked out a few times, and I kind of felt weird about it. and I want to talk to her about it but I'm scared because what if she thinks I'm just a waste of time, and I'm just too childish, or ...

How do I start this conversation?

[SlumberKitty]

I would just go into the session and say, "You know, today I'd really like to talk about relationships." Then just dive in.

What do you usually talk about in therapy if not how you relate to others? I am genuinely interested, I am not being narky. I don't relate well to others but ironically a lot of my therapy time is spent talking about how I (can't) relate to others. We don't exist in vacuums.

[emmaleemochizuki]

Originally Posted by comrademoomoo

What do you usually talk about in therapy if not how you relate to others? I am genuinely interested, I am not being narky. I don't relate well to others but ironically a lot of my therapy time is spent talking about how I (can't) relate to others. We don't exist in vacuums.

I mean romantic relationships that I have never talked about.

not all relationships.

Ah ok. I guess romantic relationships don't have a special place for me.

[ElectricManatee]

It's weird until it isn't. Therapy is a good place to get comfortable with talking about weird things. I'd do what Kit said and just announce that you want to talk about relationships or dating or sexual attraction or whatever. Maybe preface it by saying that you're uncomfortable so your therapists knows to be extra gentle.

[Lostislost]

I know people in their 50s that are still too scared to be in relationships, have dates, have sex or connect with people...it makes sense to talk about it and figure out why it's awkward for you, while you are still young

[ScarletPimpernel]

I let L read a letter about my entire "intimate" history today. She has always told me that no topic is taboo in therapy. The other week, I wrote an email where I unintentionally dipped my toe in the water. I forget why, what prompted it, but I told L how frequent H and I are intimate. Oh! It was because we were talking about safe touch and how I don't really get that at home; that she is basically the only person I get safe touch from. She handled it well. Actually, she didn't bring it up. So I asked her if what I wrote was okay. She was gentle and just used the word "frequency" (and reiterated that no topic is taboo). All of the sudden I had an urge to jump in the deep end. That's what lead to her reading my letter in-person with me today.

She encouraged me to acknowledge and respect my gut instincts. If I felt ready, then she was ready. We did a lot of talking last week to prepare for today.

So my advice is trust your instincts. If you feel ready and have an urge to tell her things, you might want to try bringing up a small topic about relationships. "Test the waters". I will say this: if you write her, you may not want to do it through email. If you do it through email, it goes into your file. If you hand her a letter, you can take back the letter and shred it.