[ScarletPimpernel]

Not literally or physically. Do I dare process what happened with ex-T with L? I've tried to keep her out of our relationship, but after I found a pm from someone here and I shared it with L, I feel like I already let her in. And I regret it. I feel like she's going to taint my relationship with L. She already took so much away from me and I've worked so hard trying to get it back. Bit her ghost rears her ugly head every once in awhile reminding me I'll never be free of her. I want L to know what I went through. Ex-T helped shaped who I am today. I think it would be helpful to L to know my past. But I'm so scared it will ruin my relationship with L.

Any thoughts?

[ElectricManatee]

Your relationship has weathered a lot of things, right? Your secret, your anger, your other intense emotions? I bet you anything that your relationship can handle the topic of your ex-T too.

[ScarletPimpernel]

Yes. Very true. I have been open and honest with L about EVERYTHING but ex-T. It's not that I've been dishonest about her, it's that I don't bring her up. But you're right. L knows my secret, my intimate history, my feelings for her, etc. And she already knows the worst I did with ex-T: yell at her and slam the door. I guess I'm scared that if I let ex-T "out of the box" she'll ruin the relationship I have with L somehow.

[elisewin]

It obviously still bothers you (I don't know what happened with your ex-T, but sounds traumatic) so I suggest you bring it up with your current T. "Letting her in" sounds a bit heavy, instead it would probably help you getting her out your head when discussing things that still bother you.