Couch 224: 2day, 2morrow, 4evah!

I try!

I'm sorry, that seems really difficult. Do you know how much longer you'll be able to keep seeing him? And have you looked more into another T you could see?

The date keeps getting pushed forward. He told me last week that he only needs to be in person for two weeks during summer term so now he's thinking end of July or August. I hate to sound ungrateful, because I am so grateful we have more time, but the moving target date is making things hard for me as well. It's like being in some kind of limbo.

I drink one cup of coffee a day. It is delicious. But when I have 2 -the second one is never as good - so I just have one and switch to green tea.
Tiramisu -I like the individual ingredients but I don't like them all combined into tiramisu.
We are all going to die with or without coffee. But we are not all going to die from lack of coffee. Lack of coffee will just make some of us hope for a swift death or a cup of coffee

This would really aggravate me. He either needs to commit to being your therapist, period, or commit to a date when he will stop being your therapist and that’s that. Basically what he’s doing is a form of emotional torture (pardon my French) because it does leave you in limbo. And no one struggling with mental health issues should have to deal with that.

I'm sorry, NP. That sounds so difficult.

Fancy, creamy, cake desserts are not italy's strong suit. They are almost naïf.

I could use some encouragement. I’m in a bad mood and getting another story rejection is not helping. I like this story. It’s the best one I’ve written. Real authors think it’s good. So although this is only the 5th rejection, and they probably have little to do with the quality, it feels deflating.

I'm sorry - that would be deflating. I'm not familiar with the process but hopefully something will come through for you.

I'm sorry ATAT. I'd be deflated, too. The fact that people you consider real authors think it's good is very encouraging. I hope that someplace accepts it soon.

I am sorry to hear this. It does get discouraging. But I hope eventually the publishers see the light.

The process, at least for me: write a story, submit it to publications (I do ten simultaneously), then as you get rejections replace that submission with another publication and keepit at ten under consideration at once. So I now need to send out the story to two more to replace the latest rejections.

This time I did choose publications with lower acceptance rates than I had last time I was submitting stuff.

I won’t do vanity self-publishing, though, so I just need to keep on submitting.

Sending encouragement. I hope you get success soon.

Keep going. You only need one.

@@ you know your story is good, real authors know your story is good. Eventually someone will see how brilliant it is and you will get published. Just keep trying. Keep your head up and straighten your crown!

My doctor's appointment was okay yesterday. The BP reading at the dr's office was fine. Sigh. Even though it has mostly been high at home with a few days that have been fine. Dr didn't seem to want to believe me even though I had the results there in black and white. She did seem to believe me more when I told her I had gone to donate platelets but couldn't due to low iron and they said my BP was high. Though they didn't tell me what it was and I didn't ask. She was like you should have brought your machine so we could test it. Well no one told me that so I didn't know. She got on me for not doing my labs even though my labs were not due until April. Then she said I needed But she keeps changing her mind on this because I am a so she says I don't need it and then yesterday it was all about how the insurance is on her case because she hasn't done one for me and I'm like....who cares what the insurance says. It's my health and you're there to advise. But I didn't say that out loud. I just thought it loudly. So she gave me a prescription for some BP medicine but told me to not take it if my BP is normal (duh) so I took it this morning because it was high and now I have a headache. I don't get headaches. I get migraines. But not headaches. So this is weird. And I don't like it. She said to be prepared next time for the even though I have always freaked out and never been able to get one done. So yeah. This ought to just be a blast. She asked me if I would prefer to go to a gyno and I was like no. I'd rather not go to someone I don't know. She didn't ask me about my mental health which kind of made me upset because she always asks about that. But there was a patient in after me that she seemed eager to get to. An older woman. She even stopped my exam to go talk to her nurse about the patient. So I sort of felt like I didn't get my $30 worth. She did check on my asthma and checked for Covid symptoms (negative) and checked my heart and lungs. I told her I started noom and she's like good, keep doing that. Then for some reason she checked my ankles. I think for fluid retention. Boy I'm getting old. And she said watch the salt. Which I don't add salt to anything to I just need to make sure I am not eating anything particularly salty. Which I don't usually, except the occasional french fry. She was actually there in person though I was told I would see her on Zoom. So I did get to see her in person, which was nice.

Hugs, Kit, that all sounds really stressful. Did she send you to get any bloodwork done? Just wondering because the platelet place said your iron was low. Or did she say to do anything about that? I think anemia can affect blood pressure.

Was the BP medication a beta blocker, like, say, propanolol? I was asking because I was given those maybe 5 years ago to try to help with my anxiety, and they gave me a headache (non-migraine--and I do get migraines) each time I took them, so I stopped. So wondering if that's what you got?

As for the ankles, when I went to the cardiologist, he actually listened with his stethoscope to my ankles, which seemed really odd (I guess they seemed OK?). I'd guess she was looking for swelling, as that can be a sign of heart issues.

I second what the others said, @@. Sending sparkles of encouragement your way!

Just thought I'd share that you're miles ahead of me just by submitting like you do - I haven't actually submitted any poems since I got the first round of rejections and that's been awhile ago. I'm still writing, but everything I've written in the past 6 months is still hiding on my laptop. I haven't even shared any poems with L in quite awhile.

I've started using certain dreams to create short stories from, and here's another place where you rock! You finish stories! I have 3 that are again, hiding on my laptop, half-finished.

So, don't let 'em get you down. I'm betting you'll get an acceptance soon!

Hi LT,

No, the doctor gave me an ACE inhibitor called Lisinopril. She was supposed to write it for 60 pills so if I needed one in the evening I could take a pill then too, but I only got 30 pills and it says once a day. Even though when she discussed with me she said take one at night if I need to and in the morning if I need to. Or maybe she is assuming that the BP will be high only half the time. (Both my parents have high BP and I'm overweight so it was pretty much inevitable I think, though I am working on losing weight but can't change my family history). She didn't give me new labs because I have a set of labs that are sent to the lab place already for April. But she didn't say anything about the low iron. I do tend to be borderline anemic. Next time if I go to give platelets it will probably be fine. I know it was more of an issue when I was a child. But now it's like half the time.


Thanks for your advice about the I'll try it with her I guess if she pushes it and if I can't do it then I'll go to the gyno I suppose. I don't know why it is an issue with her sometimes and sometimes it isn't. I was relieved when we had phone appointments because she couldn't bring it up. But now that we are back in person I guess the rules have changed again.


Next time I will bring my blood pressure cuff so she can test it and next time I'm going to have pages of data as it is about two months before I see her so hopefully she takes the BP thing more seriously. It felt like she gave me the 10 mg of the medicine just to shut me up. I didn't like how she seemed much more focused on the next patient than me. Although I know the next patient could be in worse health than me or just had a serious crisis or something but it was still my turn. My appointment. My money. She should focus on me. Sorry if that sounds selfish but first in person appointment in a year, I would kind of like my 10 minutes.

Its amazing how dealing with physical health complications and complexities can have an impact on our mental health. I know today I feel more "down" and "depressed" and "hurt" and "angry" than yesterday. But I just gotta sit with the feelings and see how they come out.

Because you blood pressure was normal in the office and you haven't previously been on anything for it, it is pretty normal to start only with a low dose of something to see if it helps. My husband has always had high blood pressure, and we've gone through several blood pressure meters over the years - they can get a bit off over time.

Hopefully, you'll figure the Pap smear thing out. I'm not sure what your age is, but the occasional Pap smear probably needs to be done. They don't insist it be annual anymore like they once did thank goodness. Once I got past child-bearing, I used my family doctor which was fine. Unfortunately, I developed polyps now so it's back to a gynecologist for me these days.

I know it can be frustrating when a medical doctor steps out to deal with another patient (although my medical doctors seem to come in and out a lot anyway), but sometimes that has to do with the urgency and condition of that other patient - they may be closely monitoring that patient for some reason and frequent updates become a necessity. They may get calls from other doctors or the hospital that have to be handled at that moment. I helps me to remember a medical doctor works on a completely different paradigm than someone like a therapist. Even when I saw my psychiatrist, I knew he headed the psych unit at the hospital, and it was not unusual for him to have to deal with something of urgency during my appointment.

Hugs, Kit.


I don't really understand the difference between beta blockers and ace inhibitors as far as which one they prescribe for blood pressure (I work for a pharmacy, but I haven't taken the pharmacy tech training yet where I imagine I'd learn stuff like this). i've been on atenolol (a beta blocker) for 22+ years now, they've adjusted the dosage here and there. Maybe one difference is how it's prescribed? I take it once a day every day. Except when I forget, and I can always tell when i've forgotten, because i get a headache.

Thanks Artley that does help. Now I feel a little bad about feeling put out that the doctor was way more focused on the other patient than me. One thing with the that I am worried about is the doctor might implant a tracking device while doing the procedure. Although that may be a delusion. Or hallucination. I mix them up. I did let one doctor try but she didn't get finished and I freaked out so she stopped. Then I didn't have that doctor anymore. Too bad because she was pretty kind. This doctor is always kind of irritable. But she is usually understanding about the Mental Health issues so I keep her. She's a bit snappy with her staff though. I imagine she is a micro manager.

Thanks Artie.

I don't know the difference either and I don't know what my parents take. Maybe I should find out. That might make a difference in what works for me. I'm hopeful that as I lose weight my BP will stabilize and I won't need the medicine for a while. But I fully anticipate needing it at some point. I have all the bad genes from both of my parents.

My PCP feels my ankles to check for good circulation (I have a small varicosity on one calf from an old sports injury).