[pachyderm]

That was a thought that I had yesterday: my T is nothing special!

Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

It depends on my frame of mind...

[Mouse_]

Could be that you feel its best to destroy her just incase she lets you down? Could be that your safe enought now to begin to see her as human? what do you think?

[Perna]

I guess to me it would depend on my definition of "special"? My T was a regular woman, didn't walk on water or anything but did have a knack/experience with some things I wanted/needed to learn. She once surprised me by saying about herself, "I'm good at what I do" which, I suppose is partially why she did it. I once made the mistake of saying something along the lines that she was psychologist so did/thought thus-and-so when she met people in her regular life and she was offended and ascerbic in explaining it was her job, not "her".

do you need/want your T to be something special? does it matter if he/she isn't? why? i hate to do that but that is exactly what my T would say to me. Right now, at this point, i need him to be special, and he is.. he's not magic or anything wacky, but i believe no one can care about me, no one can know me and still like me.. so if i make him into a special case then i can accept some of what he does... it's a transitory thing i hope. Would creating such an aura for you T help?

you're a very guarded person it seems.. is it protection for you?

lol patchy.

there is an album that i really like. it is called 'death by chocolate' by the band de phazz. there is a song that goes like this:

'because you're special
just like everybody else'

but that seems to be the opposite

(or maybe it is just the same??)

as what you are saying?

[pachyderm]

I think, Alex, that you are the only one that saw the humor in the situation. So many here (including me) have relations with the T that are full of drama and seem to be a love/hate relationship. So when it occurred to me that my T was really nothing special, I found it an amusing contrast that I could think such a thing.

Mouse said: "Could be that you feel its best to destroy her just incase she lets you down?"

I guess I have already destroyed "her" -- since my T is male...

[Mouse_]

drama? Or the workting through of painful lifes?

Maybe it is that most of the time we are immersed in the love/hate feelings... So intense... So incredibly painful at times...

That Patchy just kind of stood apart from that, for a moment... And found the humor in the situation. Sometimes it occurs to me that it is quite funny... A relief from the intensity for a time... Humor as a healthy, adaptive, coping strategy.

My 'dramatics' can seem quite amusing to me, at times.
But when I'm immersed in them, don't even think to call them 'dramas' or I'm going to feel mortified / invalidated / angry / despairing.

Maybe they really are two sides to the same coin?

I'm not sure (this is something I think on a lot)

Between my therapist being the most special and precious person in the world to me...
And my therapist being just like everybody else

Everyone is special
But then does that mean that no-one is?

There is some kind of transcendence, here

(Similarly to feeling healthy self esteem where one feels valued and appreciated and important... Just like everybody else)

don't know how to embed it - sorry:

lol, i hadn't seen the videoclip before