Unable to afford Psychotherapy

What is the next best thing, or strategy for oneself, if therapy is not an option?

I'm relatively honest about my behaviours and past and somewhat self-reflective. However, I now live alone, have no friends to offload to and therefore most of my thinking stays within my own head.

The most positive therapeutic experience I ever had was 3 months with a counseling service which specialised in adoption trauma. Sadly, I may never be able to restart this.


How can I hope to make progress without professional support?

Could you try to find a therapist who offers treatment on a sliding scale, based on your income?

Hello Lonesome

ATM therapy is not an option.
My question really concerns whether/how an individual can begin to explore and unpick one's past traumas or behaviour, perhaps even towards improving oneself, independently of a T?

Are there self help books around this area, for instance, perhaps based upon psychoanalytic theories..?

It just seems there's a particular emphasis placed upon therapy - with understandable reason - which caused me to consider alternatives for those open to change.

I recommend journaling

I know this will not fix your past but I have made tremendous progress this year using the Calm app. There are 3 daily sessions that are approximately 10 minutes each. Every day it us a new concept or way to think about or deal with life that include a short meditation.

While I also go to therapy, I use this app daily and often start each session with what I learned from Calm that week. It also has a million other things to do but I like to just focus on the 3 dailies based on my time frame. It costs about $60 a year but much cheaper than therapy. Personally I bought i to a lifetime membership for about $150 during mt second year. It is tge best investment I have ever made.

I personally don’t think that introspection and thinking in one’s head is helpful. I think it leads to rumination. Personally I think that doing things is more helpful, like exercising, taking up hobbies. For me, the helpful thing about therapy wasn’t gaining any understanding of my past, but the relationship with the therapist. I’m sorry, that’s not an option for you. But I do think that the things we do can be really therapeutic, and can help us to feel and think differently.

What about groups for adult adoptees? Or podcasts about the topic? (the Adoptee Next Door is a good one IMHO).

I don’t think one single thing replaces therapy but probably a combination of journaling, meditation, learning (whatever way you do that best), community involvement and exercise can all be helpful in training your mind to do new things.

I think there are quite a few books on psychotherapy out there. But maybe it depends what your trauma(s) comes from? There are workbooks as well.

Have you ever listened to a podcast called This Jungian Life? They have so many topics, I love it.

Another thought is to connect to other people who have had similar trauma. I imagine there's a Facebook group, subreddit, or something else where you can connect with others with similar experiences. Well, and this forum. I find some Facebook groups for parents of children with special needs to be helpful, as we can share our experiences. And there are other people who get it, so you feel less alone. Plus they might have other good resources (books, etc.) to share.

Have you considered support groups for adult adoptees? I just googled and it looks like there's a lot out there, and a lot online. While I'm sure there are useful books out there, it sounds like you're pretty isolated and finding a group of peers might be really helpful.

So many great ideas and practical responses. Thank you to all who chipped-in.
@AliceKate - Journaling is the next thing on my list to explore. I've promised myself a L...O...N... G time to commit to this. NOW is the time. I've every reason to, a new home, an amazing neighbor, living alone, interest in writing/reflecting, needed distraction from old habits....

@zoiecat - £££ is tight atm but the least I can do is take a look and find out more about the Calm app. Never heard of it before. Perhaps it could add an alternative angle to my efforts at self-healing. Thank you.

@Brown Owl 2 "I personally don’t think that introspection and thinking in one’s head is helpful. I think it leads to rumination. Personally I think that doing things is more helpful, like exercising, taking up hobbies."

Deep introspection is something I'd like to avoid so we're agreed on this point! Hobbies and daily exercise I already have covered and, like you, would recommend them wholeheartedly to anyone looking for ways to keep the mind healthy and positively occupied.

@Lostislost - A brilliant suggestion. TJL looks like it has the potentioal to be really enlightening, at very least thought-provoking/entertaining. Thank you. I will follow this up.

@LonesomeTonight @Salmon77
Thank you both. I've dabbled with like-minded groups in the past. Generally mixed results. I'm in a different place (psychically) now so perhaps time to explore this arena again. Thank you.

Can you get self help book 📚

Hey @wobblehead

Self-help books are gold dust, I know. Good suggestion. I already have a couple of quite specific one's re (trans-racial) adoption and they've been super for dipping into.

I suppose what I've been musing over is whether self-analysis, or a thing approaching this, exists. It sounds odd, I know. I'm sure it takes a special type of training/person to gently guide a troubled individual through their trauma.

So often I read responses which amount to: '...find a good therapist...' and it occurred to me that, whilst preferable, it may not always be practical or even wanted. Then I thought: can one possibly begin to explore one's own psyche?

So far I'm loving the idea and practice of regular exercise, journalling and specific podcasts. Perhaps with a combination of all, they can assist in relaxation and self-contemplation without necessarily leading to negativity.