[jesyka]

I’m 50 years old & have been going to various psychiatrists, psychologists & even a hypnotherapist for 30 years.

Inhave tried so many different medications & have tried CBT, etc. Nothing works. I’m angry that I wasted thousands of dollars on useless treatments & mostly useless medications.

Some medication only helped a little bit. What’s worse is that a lot of these professionals didn’t seem to take me seriously. They’d mostly sit there & not say much. Or worse, they’d talk about themselves or other paitients. No names were mentioned, but thst was inappropriate & unethical.

One doctor constantly took non emergency phone calls during sessions. I said nothing as I thought that I needed him for medication at that time. He was a psychiatrist.

I no longer trust any of them. They ALL use the SAME cookie cutter one size fits all approach to treatment. They get frustrated whenever you aren’t making progress fast enough & try to make you feel bad by comparing you to other people at times, ugh, so rude & unprofessional!

A lot of the times, they use the same cliches that are annoying to hear like, how invalidating! It sounds insincere & rehearsed like they say that to everyone.

A few times I think I overwhelmed a few student thetapists as the zoom meetings got cut off with ME only & they never had this issue with anyone else.

It was so frustrating that they couldn’t be honest with me. I hate passive aggressive behavior! It’s rude & unprofessional too!

Has therapy not worked for anyone else too? It’s a joke! At least most of the so called professionals I went to were a joke.

Never again! I’m officially done with this b.s!

[Therapy reviewed]

I've had some internal changes. The relationship was what helped with that to a degree. But to be honest, after all the years and money I'm not sure the results are any different to time just doing it's thing.

[stopdog]

I never figured out the point of going in and handing a stranger money to sit there while I talked. Therapy is not the universal panacea some like to sell it as. I am a thousand times happier not hiring a therapist than I was hiring one - I found therapy to be worse than what I was trying to fix

[ArtleyWilkins]

I don’t think anything is a universal panacea. But therapy worked well for me. I no longer deal with depression, my PTSD symptoms are by and large gone. I’m able to cope healthily with very difficult life situations now without spiraling into a crisis. I was very fortunate to have worked with very good therapists and psychiatrists, and I am quite certain I am alive and well because I had that support in place.

[jesyka]

Originally Posted by ArtleyWilkins

I don’t think anything is a universal panacea. But therapy worked well for me. I no longer deal with depression, my PTSD symptoms are by and large gone. I’m able to cope healthily with very difficult life situations now without spiraling into a crisis. I was very fortunate to have worked with very good therapists and psychiatrists, and I am quite certain I am alive and well because I had that support in place.

You got lucky & found one of the few caring & goos therapists our there. Most of them only seem to care about the money.

[ArtleyWilkins]

Originally Posted by jesyka

You got lucky & found one of the few caring & goos therapists our there. Most of them only seem to care about the money.

Actually I have found several excellent therapists and psychiatrists along the way. I don’t consider it luck. It was work on my part and consistency on theirs. Several of them were unpaid because of the organizations they worked through; they definitely weren’t in it for the money.

[stopdog]

From my observation of that ilk - it is more admiration and worship they want - money is important but being adored is more seductive to those guys.

[ArtleyWilkins]

Also not typically my experience but it is definitely an issue (not just in therapy—see it in multiple professions). I found my Ts and Pdocs (that I chose to work with long-term) to be largely pretty grounded: family people, flawed human beings just like we all are. But supportive and consistent. I ran into a few along the way that I only saw a few times because they were not good matches for what I needed, but I didn’t give them enough time to care.

I wasn’t one to keep seeing someone who I didn’t trust/like/respect. Didn’t have the time, and when I did start paying definitely didn’t have the money to waste. I’m pretty picky that way. I think all the years of working to find truly good specialists for my husband’s medical condition made me very impatient with incompetence and very weirdly skilled (is it a skill or just careful diligence—not sure) at honing in on the right person for the job. Get burned once or twice and you become really focused on finding the right fit and avoiding the turkeys.

I did totally “luck out” with my pdoc. The first time I was hospitalized I was randomly assigned to him. He offered to take me on as a private client after my discharge—something he doesn’t routinely do. He was a kind person—very soft-spoken and kind—so I stuck with him. He ended up being fantastic. Good thing because I had no idea otherwise where to start in wading through the list of providers on my insurance. Sometimes things just work out well. That was one of those times.

Not every therapist is good. Not every good therapist, even, is necessarily the right therapist for a person. Not every person needs therapy. And when we do, it can be difficult to find the right fit. All I knew was not to stay with the ones that didn’t feel right for me (and I got that sense pretty quickly).

[The_little_didgee]

A psychiatrist once told me psychotherapy isn't suitable for every client.

It definitely didn't help me the first time. I was actually harmed by it, along with my hospitalizations and medications. At one point I was on so much medication I was being diagnosed with illnesses solely on the side effects I was experiencing and reporting. -- The lack of critical thinking was outrageous.

The "industry" tends to be extremely concrete especially psychiatry. It can promote dependency, over diagnosis and inappropriate prescribing of medications.

There are definitely other options out there.

[LonesomeTonight]

I was just having a conversation with my therapist today about the progress I've made since I started seeing my therapist. We both agreed that I've increased considerably coping skills, security of attachment (in general with people), and some other things. And I'm working on improving some areas of my health now (increased exercise, reducing drinking) and doing better than I think either of us expected.

I think so much of it depends on fit with the therapist. And finding one who does tailor their approach to you (even if it's not necessarily their normal method of working with clients). Things like CBT haven't really worked for me, for example, and I learned to just tell therapists that from the start. As Artley mentioned, consistency is important, too.

But it's also important knowing that changes can take time and aren't generally linear (and having a therapist who understands that as well). Change can be very gradual and involve some steps forward, then some back before moving forward again.

For jesyka: Have you tried anything different from typical talk therapy or medication, aside from hypnotherapy? I considered changing therapists a few months ago (decided not to) and looked into somatic therapy, which includes EMDR, and also guided imagery. There's also TMS (brain stimulation), which has helped my mother-in-law. Or ketamine therapy, which helped one of my friends. Just something to consider.

Another option could be to see an integrative doctor, who could check into things like vitamin/mineral deficiencies and other root causes for psychiatric symptoms with more natural treatments (like, maybe your body doesn't absorb vitamin B12 from food well, so you could benefit from B12 injections). Or, even thinking of regular medical doctors, have you had things like thyroid levels tested recently? As that can affect mental health.

[here today]

I'm 75 and it didn't work for me. Over 50 years of trying, on and off.

I thought it did, or was going to, for a long time. Eventually the doubts I read on this forum resulted in me experiencing more fully my own doubts, which I believe I wasn't able to experience or consider as valid because of issues I went into therapy with.

The last therapist, a specialist in trauma and dissociation, diagnosed me with what I believe was a useful diagnosis, in terms of understanding my difficulties. But her "therapy" did NOT help much, although I kept feeling like it would eventually if I was honest with her about my feelings. After 6 years she terminated me saying that she didn't "have the emotional resources" to continue. That triggered, or retraumatized, the original trauma that I had/could never experience. It was quite awful for a number of months and even years. But eventually I have gotten over it somewhat, with the support of this forum, and some others, and with a real-life support group I had lucked into a year before the therapist terminated me. Also my years of research help my intellect provide some support and understanding for my emotional life, for which the term "dissociation" or "fragmentation" was probably accurate. Nevertheless, how do you move on from that?

"Never again!" is my philosophy, too, although I have tried a couple (keep my cards very close to the vest). I did have some luck with a therapist whom I asked just to tell me how I come across to her, so that I could try to regain, or gain, some confidence that I could get along with other people.

I now live in a supportive (senior) community and that helps a lot, too.

[Blueberrybook]

I am 45, and I have been trying off and on since I was 20. Some of the therapists were caring individuals, just not right for me. I did hypnotherapy, CBT, nothing worked and along the way, I had my share of bad therapists, constantly late therapists, forgotten appointments therapists (yeah, that makes you feel real good to be forgotten about by your T).

I know therapy works for some, but I have decided to stop throwing away money on it because after 20 so therapists, I just draw the line.

[Rose76]

Over the years, I too spent a lot of time and money on professional "help." I never found that it made much of a difference, other than kind of feel good while I was sitting there, getting this person's attention. The insights and changes I needed to make I pretty much figured out on my own.

Most of these professionals struck me as decent people with good intentions. However I've come to look at them in the following way: that professional sitting in front of you is there to make a living. He or she probably has a mortgage to make payments on and a car loan to keep up with and some student debt and maybe some kids in need of all that kids need. This person is earning a livelihood and trying to do so without getting burnt out. My problems are my problems. They've got their own. They'ld probably like to be helpful, but I don't think there's a lot they can do. Over the course of a week, they see client after client with problem after problem, and I think they get a little bored with it all.

A therapist's ad may say she's offering help for the following problems: marital difficulties, depression, gambling addiction, career dissatisfaction, child rearing problems, sexual issues, eating disorders, sleep irregularity, unresolved grief, personality disorders, substance abuse, and on and on. I guess these people should get hired by the United Nations to solve all the issues that cause all the wars on the planet. It's ridiculous to think that getting MSW or PhD or MD after your name makes you some kind of wizard who can solve all the problems bedeviling the human condition. I'ld be more impressed if each professional stuck to one specialty issue.

I've known some psych professionals. Some were pretty screwed up themselves. Yet, over the years, I've seen how what they get paid for 45 minutes of their time has gone up and up and up through the roof. When your health insurance covers it, I guess a person has nothing to lose by going to these professionals. When it's your own money, there's possibly better ways you can spend it.

[Rive.]

Oh please, let's be real. Nobody can 'solve' anyone else's depression, marital difficulties, gambling additions etc. This is not only unrealistic but a pretty absurd expectation to hold towards mental health professionals.

Therapists can 'help with' particular issues, yes but anyone who claims to be a 'wizard who can solve all problems' is ridiculous. And anyone who goes to such people need a solid dose of reality check.

Therapists can offer support, help manage symptoms or conditions, provide tools or coping strategies, address beliefs, help to make peace with a difficult life circumstance etc. but that's it. NO ONE can 'solve' anyone else's problem(s).

Not saying there aren't unethical and/or incompetent therapists but of course, these people are making a living. How on earth would they live if they offered their services for free? If you want greedy and despicable, look at lawyers - more cold-hearted, soulless, money hungry creatures, one cannot find on this planet.