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Mountaindewed
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Default Jun 03, 2024 at 06:05 PM
  #621
I know I've mentioned this before but do you ever think of the part of the song that goes

"Some men you just can't save"

And think of me?

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comrademoomoo
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Default Jun 04, 2024 at 08:12 AM
  #622
I have started to feel things about you and that's a worry. No wonder I am telling you to Łuck off. I must find a better way to be appealing to the people I want to be close.
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Default Jun 04, 2024 at 09:29 AM
  #623
J: Out of any fking substance, out of any substance I have abused in the past, you choose the one that was the least of my problematic use that was still problematic.

Mania+downers=looks like I did uppers?

TJ: I know we're supposed to learn distress tolerance skills tomorrow, but I feel like mine are already adequate. I tolerate distress quite well...I just don't like to do it the boring way.

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ArtieTheSequal
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Default Jun 04, 2024 at 02:39 PM
  #624
Ah L. It feels weird to call you "ex-T" because you'll always be T to me. And I no longer want you to be anything else. I caught myself in another of those complexes you were always on about, and deleted my previous post when I realized it was a stupid complex driving those thoughts and not reality. All is well. I'm not angry. And because of the work we did, also thanks to Edgar Allan Poe's darker poetry, I've been learning how to partner with my shadow instead of fighting those parts to create my own poems inspired by his. It's interesting. I started out just googling his poems but ended up buying a hard copy. Easier for me to reference an actual book while I'm writing. For now anyway, writing every day is all the therapy I need.
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LonesomeTonight
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Default Jun 05, 2024 at 11:55 AM
  #625
Dear T,
After locating the new "leave" button on Zoom (thanks for giving me a few seconds to do that instead of just leaving yourself), I nearly reflexively said, "Bye, love you" like I would when saying bye to one of my parents on the phone. So glad I stopped myself after the "bye"! (Had all the "love stuff" not happened a year and half ago, I'm sure we could have both just laughed it off, but now I suspect you'd assign more meaning to it and it would be weird.)
I can say it here:
Love you,
LT
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Mountaindewed
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Default Yesterday at 12:37 AM
  #626
I think its the med increases helping with my agoraphobia. Plus I'm not normally too sick in the morning.

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Default Yesterday at 09:56 AM
  #627
It's amazing how a subtle shift from talking about how something 'made me cry', to 'allowed me to cry' can make such a difference to how I view it.

Feeling my feelings is hard, as you know.

Thank you for your presence while I do so.

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Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
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Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

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'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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Default Yesterday at 10:26 AM
  #628
Ma'am, I am once again politely telling you to fk off.

Just kidding

I do like how you call me a horrible person without calling me a horrible person though. After sessions I kinda realize things you said and think in a more elaborate way of what was discussed/why my answers were those answers. Just wish I could open up in the moment in a way that doesn't sound more extreme than it probably was, generally to make people I'm not on good terms with at that second look worse than they are.

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Mountaindewed
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Default Yesterday at 05:39 PM
  #629
You said today you've been thinking about me a lot. I think you think of me more then I do of you.

My mom called you a "large woman" in the car. Idk why.

I'm glad you think my doctor is also a quack.

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Default Today at 03:17 AM
  #630
In spite of all the ex t stuff, it's you I want to see. When you sent me the zoom link I wanted to reply 🥲
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Default Today at 07:29 AM
  #631
Three more sleeps.

Release, release, release...

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'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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