Does your therapist Curse or swear alot....?

Does or has anyone ever been to a therapist, who uses alot of

curse words? Mine does on occassion not directed at me but

towards other people in my life from the past who may have harmed

me.

I was also wondering Lots of people in my family use to curse

especially my dad when he was like inpatient/ upset. The "F" word

was classic. Then there was my uncle who my mother carried on an

affair with since I was age 2-30 he was an avid curser. Sounds

messed up I know. I used to curse alot in my teens and 20's.

Know being middle age when I get inpatient or stressed I tend

to hold it all in. I don't curse like i used too. Anyone think

cursing is good to blow off stress? I can't see doing it in

public but I'm talking about around the home environment?

All questions & comments welcome
Thanks Ziggy1
ziggy1

I think it's a habit and from what I've seen and experienced of it; I don't like the habit because the cursing has to take the place of "real" words that might actually communicate. Having to work to think of words, to try and communicate is always a good thing in my book.

I'd be startled by a therapist who swore. I guess only occasionally would catch my attention so I'd look at and think about what they were swearing at?

My T doesn't swear. If something makes him angry he tells me it makes him angry. I think if he did much swearing it would be disrespectful. He has used the D word or the H word a few times, but not using it as swearing.

I don't swear at other people, I might say something to myself if I make a mistake, but I don't think it sounds good.

she has only a few times. Can you share with your T why the cursing triggers you a bit.

My T has no problem using curse words. I tend to use them quite a bit so I think he's just matching my abilities, hahaha. Actually, he's just being real. Something I really love about him.

My T and I both swear occasionally, but not a lot. We do it more now than at first, as we know each other better now and so can be more informal. I remember after months and months of seeing him, he swore in session and apologized ("excuse my French" sort of comment). I thought that was sweet. Now we don't feel the need to apologize for swearing, but just do it if the situation warrants it. For people who swear very little, like the two of us, when a swear word is used, it communicates a lot! (I would say it is less than every five sessions that a swear word is used.)

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sunrise said:
(I would say it is less than every five sessions that a swear word is used.)

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I would say that it is more than five times in every session that a swear word is used... at least by me, lol.

T has only sworn when repeating back to me what I am saying, ie, I may say they %#@&#! me up, and she reply something like even though they %#@&#! you up......I think she does this to show she is on the same page....though she did use the word snot spontainously once LOL, I thought, YOU GO GAL! LOL

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pinksoil said:
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sunrise said:
(I would say it is less than every five sessions that a swear word is used.)

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I would say that it is more than five times in every session that a swear word is used... at least by me, lol.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">I have a session today, and I am going to keep tabs. I want to talk about something today that makes me quite angry, so I predict I will be swearing, lol. It is a way of saying hey, I'm angry! because usually I am so contained.

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sunrise said:
have a session today, and I am going to keep tabs. I want to talk about something today that makes me quite angry, so I predict I will be swearing, lol. It is a way of saying hey, I'm angry! because usually I am so contained.

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I have a session, too, so I will keep tabs as well and we will see who wins, hahahahaha.

I think that swearing is something that a therapist should ideally alter to be in keeping with the clients terminology in the same way that a therapist should ideally alter their terminology in other areas.

Probably better for a therapist to not swear and not offend than to swear and then offend. I swear a little. My therapist doesn't swear at all. So I try and swear less. I've had therapists who have seemed happy to reciprocate my frequency, though.

I guess it is most effective when used in moderation. Individual decision, I think. There are (or there certainly can be) other forms of expression that convey a similar emotional tone - but they can be hard to find at times.

LOL thanks so far for the feedback, sometimes i swear quite a bit

using the "F" word. And so she has too. I don't use it as much

as i used to in real life. Although when i use it in therapy she

realizes my sense of heightened anger, i seem to feel better

afterwards too..LOL. But I won't swear at anyone directly only

when i become inpatient with myself.....

how odd.. we talked about this just today. Mine swears.. i swear.. we're cool with it. He swears spontaneously when it is "right" if that makes sense. We don't swear a lot, but one of us will pretty much every session, yeah. i won't repeat the phrase as it prolly would offend some... but it didn't offend me. He was making a point and as an illustraion of it, he used this swear phrase... and he said "i know i can say that with you and you won't be offended, you're one of only two that i'd say that with... and i think in fact, that you'd rather i swore occasionally to make me more 'real'." He's right, i would.

i replied to him that what i prefer is that he be who he is, period. If that includes swearing or not, so be it. How can i feel i can be myself if he can't be his? My biggest challenge in therapy is to learn that it's ok to be who i really am.

it was hard to let him finish his point.. the swear phrase caught me off guard and i was laughing too hard to really let him talk... so, i suppose me laughing got in the way?

i can see swaering being triggery for people.. and swearing in anger (by the T i mean) can't be so good i think.

I know he has a few times but not more than I do!

my regular Dr. does.

He'll swear or curse about insurance, bad medical practices, getting meds thru mail, politics, whatever comes up. He likes to use one or two everytime he see me but perhaps that's because I usually take his last appt. of the day. Anyway, it's kind of funny to me.
He also seems more comfortable with me after 10 years.

My therapist has never sworn, although I do on occasion. I just don't think it's her style in real life either. If she did swear now, it would probably shock me, only because after so many years, not even a darn it.

My T doesn't swear that much, but I do frequently!!!!!



I drop F bombs left and right. I also curse a lot at home. I know--lovely for a mother--and my husband is none too fond of it but it works for me! If someone is offended by it though I try to honor the need and curb my enthusiasm.

If your T is using language you are uncomfortable with tell him or her. If you want to curse at home and are not offending anyone, go for it! Yes, I think it can be very therapeutic to rant...

Peace

I had a t who swore quite a bit when she was mad about the things i told her happened - mad on my behalf because i couldn't be.
then i had a t who swore regularly - but even more so when i did. like i'd say a swear word and then she'd add 3 or 4 more in rappid succession - i have no idea why.

currently, this t does not at all as far as i can tell. i have used a few "minor" words and she never blinks an eye. i usually sneek up on them as if in appology.

My T isn't using words that offend me ..she is really pro-

fessional. She just concerned for my well being and my past

issues. She drops the "F" bombs too. She's a real person, I

don't mind her style. I am really comfortable with her. I just

wanted to get opinions on the subject...but yeah i think its good

to blow off steam like that as long as your not saying it around

people who would be offended by it...Thanks for your comments!

ziggy1

My t. didn't swear until after a few sessions and then he heard me swear. I think he took that as a sign that I was comfortable with swearing. Maybe that's what a lot of therapists do.......take their cue from the client and wait to see what the client is comfortable with. Just guessing. I had my session yesterday and I know I swore several times for sure

tulips

I just had my session. The entire second half I was very angry (not at T). I think I swore at least 10 times, maybe 20? This is the most ever for me in session. I really am not much of a swearer. T did not swear a single time. I was definitely alone in my anger.

Pink, how about you today? What's the score?

I'd say my therapist swears more than what I'm hearing here...but it is real and matches how I talk too. He would never swear at me, although I think I've said a few choice words to him...

Something I've just realized - If I'm feeling very young and small, he never swears. He is just soft and gentle and uses simple words - again matching me.

One of the things I struggle with is that telling the abuse stories isn't polite. I want to use the correct terms but when I'm upset or angry, it gets more graphic and crude. My therapist tells me "there was nothing polite about what happened to you - so just say what you feel." It is still hard though.

My T has said the F word only when I said it first. She asked me, quite a while ago what my fear was about being there and I said "I fear that you'll say get the F___ out of your office." She repeated back to me that she would never tell anyone to get the F___ out of her office". I about fell over when she repeated what I said.

She has also called my mom a ******. She wanted a reaction

My T wasn't the type to swear and that made me pay attention to my own wording. I feel awkward when I swear because I don't do it very often, it's like trying to learn to smoke when you're a kid I think.

LOL sunrise...I had a session on monday and swore quite a bit
myself. Another reason I think I swear alot is because I can't
cry anymore.

I used to be able too when I first had problems but I'm all blocked up all stopped up.

So the release comes out threw swearing and bitterness.