[BrnEyedGrl]

Hi all.
I just made my first appt with a Therapist on Wednesday. It took me quite a while to get up the nerve to call, but I finally did it!
Does anyone have any suggestions for me? Since it is a first appt, should I ask any questions? Or just go in and see what happens?
This may sound weird but I am soooo nervous that Im afraid I will either forget something or be so intimidated that I won't speak up and let them know exactly what I need.
(Also, I have seen someone a while ago, should I have this new T request records from the old one?)
Thanks everyone for your help.

[Fragmented]

Brneyedgrl,

when I changed therapists I did not want the new one to have the information from the old and he did not suggest it was necessary. He started over from scratch and I am glad we did. His way was different and much better. More straight forward, chronological, and got to the root of things much faster. The old one and I rambled forward in a haphazard fashion that i felt was going nowhere. I would wait to see what the new one suggests.

I went in as an emergency so I was everywhere. I had no agenda and the therapist took over. Good thing. I was too upset to do anything but react and he knew it.

If you have particular things you want to address then I suggest making a list to make sure you don't walk in there and forget something. I am so bad about that. I have even just handed over the list. I have read the list. I have emailed the list in advance. Think about things you would like to talk about, goals you might want. See if any of these are things you might can talk about. For me it was so hard. Hard to talk to him. I just wanted initially to see if he would confirm the first therapists dx and how much different he was and if he was a better fit for me. And he was. We just clicked. The very difficult things I knew somewhere down the road I would need to talk about I felt like I could with him whereas with the first one I knew I never would go there with her.

Hope this helps.

If I think of more I will add them. Good luck.

fragmented

[sunrise]

Just be yourself. Relax. Breathe. Try to let yourself get a sense of the therapist and whether you would like to continue. Does it feel right?

The therapist will want to know what brings you to therapy, so be prepared to say why you are there. If you might forget, write it down. The therapist will want to know this partly to help him assess whether his expertise and training is a good match to your needs.

Unless your case is really complicated, there is probably no need for record sharing with the old T. The new T can just ask you what he needs to know.

Good luck!

Hey!

I was like you a couple weeks ago when I started with a new T. I was so nervous I almost threw up in his office.

Try and breath. If it helps maybe you can write down what you are seeing T for (if you know). Sometimes I find that helps if I can't talk. Also, they usually take over in the beginning and direct you.

You made the right decision and hopefully you will feel so much better when you get past your first meeting!

T will be welcoming!

[tulips30]

Try to think of this way....Every single person who has ever gone to therapy has had to do the 1st appt. It's hard for everybody. I think the best advice was 1) to have an idea in mind that you feel comfortable sharing as to why you are there. 2) TOTALLY be yourself. Bet it goes fast and much easier than you thought!

tulips

[BrnEyedGrl]

Thank you everyone for the replies already. You all have been so understanding and really helped me relax and just know I CAN get through this 1st appt.
Wouldn't you know that there is supposed to be a huge Winter Snow Warning the night before, wonderful, lol.
Anyway, I am using all of your advice, writing down what I need to say, breathing, and just letting it all happen so I can decide if this person is right for me.
Oh and just as a general question to all of you.....how often do you go to therapy now? weekly, biweekly, monthly? Just wondering what to expect, thanks again and I will let ya'll know how it goes.

[sunrise]

BrnEyedGrl, I go to therapy weekly right now. I started out weekly, then for a period, I went to every other week, now I am back to weekly. I find when I have two weeks between sessions, I get quite shy with T (OMG, we've been apart for 2 weeks, who is this guy?!), and it takes me longer in session to get unshy with T and open up. For me it just works better to meet every week so we don't have to go through that "getting unshy" routine.

[tulips30]

I have read that the "average therapy" is 1x weekly for 50 min. That has also been my experience. However, when my t. feels it's necessary, he sometimes suggests we make it 2x weekly until things settle down. I think this is pretty standard. But, I don't think there are any hard & fast rules.

tulips

[SingDanceRunLife]

You've already gotten great replies on the first appointment...But to answer your second question about how often...

I go weekly, unless there's a scheduling conflict, then I'll skip a week (however, we try extremely hard to avoid this). My sessions are an hour long slot, but half the time we start late so it's a little shorter, and the other half the time, we go a bit over.

I personally am so messed up that I need 2 times a week. And T agrees... Otherwise I lose connection and get crazy abandonment issues with lead to SI, etc.

There is nothing set in stone though. Things can change. You might ask what your T normally does. It also might depend on your $$, your "diagnosis", your time, and your T's time. Also, it might depend on how many client's T has with the same problems, whether they can deal with more time, etc.

Good luck

[BrnEyedGrl]

Well my appt is at 9am and I am still a little nervous which I am sure is normal. Like I mentioned earlier, of course the snow started coming down about 8pm, yippee.
But I am not going to chicken out and use the snow as an excuse, I know I need to just start.
Thank you again for all of your replies, it really does help. (Is it crazy that I am so nervous? I just can't shake it.)

[Doh2007]

It's perfectly normal to be nervous. I can't wait to hear how it went.

[sunrise]

BrnEyedGrl, did you survive? How did it go? What do you think of the therapist?