interesting session

I went in not knowing what would happen after another bad weekend of memories and si. but it was good. somehow we moved passed my nervousness and my feeling such a huge seperation between THE T and weeny little me. my "altered states" drew a lot and wrote out angry letters so T came sat next to me and we looked at them... and somehow in the rational explaination of how it is good that the parts are doing this, and how we look at them together gets them out of my head (in the trauma part) and brings them grounded into my cognitive, collective self.
I actually felt like co-workers on the same project. it made sense, it felt real, i didn't feel scared to death or intimidated.
this is starting to feel "doable"
mind you, i'm sitting here feeling more isolated than ever at home in my weeny study.
but that felt like a GIANT step forward.

Kiya, im glad things went smoothly for you. Im sorry i havent been around but work has been hectic and my days are at least 13 hours or longer.

Let me know if there is anything I can do for you.

I hope you are well today.

Colleen

That is a really big step when you can come from feeling 'little' and T seeming 'big' to feeling as though you are equals, working on this project together. I like how she sat next to you during this. Good work. :-)

=)
(((((((( colleen, pink ))))))

yeah - it did feel like an accomplishment - not 'mine' per se, but a together thing. like we reached something - or someplace that pulled it all together, made it make some cognitive sense. I am remembering (because it is important) that she told me that doing the memory work is good, and talking about it in PC and with her is important because it brings it out of the trauma/shock state where stuff has stayed for so long.
like i need to tattoo that phrase to the inside of my eyelids so i can see it often and know it is not only ok, but good and important. i think this is the first time they/ I have felt validated in just doing memory work and having flashbacks... she wasn't scared or worried - but interested/concerned at a depth which is new to me. at first i felt repulsion toward her "curiosity" until i realized it wasn't that kind of curiosity - it was being attuned to me. and that made it ok.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Kiya said:
this is starting to feel "doable"

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">what an awesome, positive statement. I hope you will share that with your T. Glad your session went so well.