T's endearing habits

T has a few habits that are endearing to me and make me smile when I think of them.

One is this sort of wry smile he gives me when I am avoiding something, and we both know it. The other is his hand gesture. He sort of extends his right hand like the godfather with his fingers extended. LOL -- I think he does this when he is not completely sure what to make of what I am saying but he "sort of" agrees with me.

What endearing habits does your T have?

Patience. Some things she does are hard for me to tolerate, but in the end she has let me go at my own pace.

the way she takes in her breath before she says something hard to hear
the way she takes a sip of her drink every time she asks me an open ended question
how she plays with her shoe on her foot and sometimes it ends up falling off with a clunk
the way she puts her hand on her heart when she says she can "feel" my pain
just the way she is. everything about her demeanor is comforting to me.

I love how he says the human race is a %#@&#! up species!

I love how he isn't afraid of showing his emotions and tells me his own weakness or faults.

I love how he pats my shoulder or back after a hard session going past him at the doorway out.

I love that he tells me he doesn't like being the bad guy, making me face the bad stuff during EMDR, that he feels like a sadist sometimes but he knows he needs to do it in order for me to heal. lol ( I alway jokily say, Yeah, right I know you like being a mean bruit)

I love his quirky way of dressing even wearing socks with sandels, with a hole in the big toe of his sock!
But hey, he is in his late 60's, what can I say.

I like the way he has taken me under his wing and not only providing me with therapy, but showing me how to be a good T with the wisdom he gained with over 40 years of experience.

Krazybean, that is a lot of good detail you've picked up about t. =)

Happy flower girl - maybe your t's from the North West! Everyone here wears socks and sandals!

Right now, NOTHING. Absolutely nothing.

What a nice question, MissCharlotte.

I like when she will take a moment, tilt her head a bit and say "I'm imagining what that woudl feel like....." after I've told her something. It's so connecting.

I really like how she moves her chair closer, no matter where I sit but particularly if I sit farthest away, at the 'other' end of the couch.

And when she leans forward to make it even closer

Oh, gosh. everythingl lol I just love her.

HFG,
At least you have a good idea now for a Christmas (oops winter holiday) gift for him. (SOCKS)

Do ya' all remember that thread? It ran from like October --> December. Do I give... just a card, nothing, gift card, make something, knit something, color something, sing something????

Better start thinking about this, it's only another 9 months away :-) OMG I feel the anxiety starting to build.

Sorry, got off track...

My T's ability to deliver subtlety key points with direct eye contact instead of yelling or biffing me in the head.

The way he sort of just plays with his goatee/beard when I'm talking to him.

This one is funny-- it doesn't happen anymore, but it used to-- for some reason, before he moved the office and he would call me he was always identify himself by his full name and the name of the agency here he works. As if I know so many people with his exact name and voice, lol. (This was after we had been working together for 2+ years-- he has recently stopped).

The way he says "thanks" at the end of every message he leaves me, even if there is absolutely nothing he should be thanking me for.

The way he can be so detailed on the most obvious things when he leaves me messages (like his name and where he works, lol). For example, one time he called me and left a message about a book he thought I would like. During the message, he mentioned at least four places I could get the book (Borders, Barnes and Noble, Amazon, etc.) as though I had never bought a book before in my life. It was so endearing.

When I am saying something that he finds funny, but he is trying to supress the laughter-- I can see his mouth sort of fill up with air and I always say, "JUST LAUGH! I CAN TELL YOU NEED TO!"

This is a great topic, Miss C-- by the way, I LOVE your new avatar. YAY!!!!

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happyflowergirl said:

I love his quirky way of dressing even wearing socks with sandels, with a hole in the big toe of his sock!


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LOL.
I am surprised that is not uncomfortable all day to have his toe hanging out!

--sometimes my T will touch the top of his nose with his finger when I make an insightful interpretation about myself or my situation, as if to say "spot on". It is very cute.

--I like how he eats when I am with him and always invites me to join him.

--I like how he gets me a bottle of water without my having to ask because he knows my routine so well.

--I like how sometimes when I thank him he says, "thank you"

--I like how he tells me the same jokes over and over again, not realizing he has told me already. I enjoy listening to him tell jokes so I just let him repeat himself. It is very cute and endearing.

My t. is so gentle in everything he does with me. Sometimes it makes me feel like a piece of valuable china that migh crack. I find this so sweet. It's especially funny cause then he will tell me that " I am so much stronger than I think I am"

2) I think it's so, sweet when for no obvious reason he will say "so, how are we?" meaning is our relationship ok? Do I have anything he's doing that bugs me etc.?

3) It makes me feel really cared about when he practically BEGS me to call him. I never call cause I'm scared of being a pain. Occasionally, I e-mail a short note and he ALWAYS adds in his response " You know you can call me, right? Please?"

4) It's so cute when we walk in his office, he runs around getting things "right" for me. He knows I like the overhead lights off with lamps only. He moves the pillow out of the way like I do etc. He looks so cute.

He's just SO darn gentle with me.
sweet t.

tulips

I love how my T tells stories. Since right now we're mostly working on my OCD, that's what the stories are about. The best part about this is that she'll not only tell stories about other patients or her family members (OCD runs in her family), she'll tell them about herself, and the fact that she's open with me just makes me feel better.

That's the big one...Actually, the only thing that I've really noticed. I mean, I'm sure that there are more, I guess that I'm just usually so wrapped up in myself at sessions...Plus, I don't really look at T all that much anyway because I pretty much hate making eye contact with people. It freaks me out. But after seeing this thread, I'm sure that I'll take note at my next session.

Well, I have only seen my new T for 8 times, so I haven't found anything endearing....in fact she is rather cold.

But my old T who I worked with for many years, her most endearing habit was that she was so gentle and protective of me. She always made sure I was present when session was ending and if I wasn't she did not "force me out the door because time was up." She was more concerned with my safety.

And she would send me postcards whenever she went away!

I miss her so much....

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Kiya said:

Happy flower girl - maybe your t's from the North West! Everyone here wears socks and sandals!

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Nope Florida! lol He is just an old geezer! lol I will never forget his green pants that looked like Mr. Green Jean on Kapt. Kangeroo! Complete with green sweater, and greens socks, all shades of green that didn't really match. lol

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mckell13 said:
HFG,
At least you have a good idea now for a Christmas (oops winter holiday) gift for him. (SOCKS)

Do ya' all remember that thread? It ran from like October --> December. Do I give... just a card, nothing, gift card, make something, knit something, color something, sing something????

---LOL you are so funny! Oh, how would I decide which pair?

Better start thinking about this, it's only another 9 months away :-) OMG I feel the anxiety starting to build.

Sorry, got off track...

My T's ability to deliver subtlety key points with direct eye contact instead of yelling or biffing me in the head.

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---LoL, what a good quality your T has! lol

LOL.
I am surprised that is not uncomfortable all day to have his toe hanging out!

---Maybe I should ask him next time, but then he would start with the "I am only human" again, I swear if I hear that one more time.........grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. That is when I say humans suck, and then he says, yes the human race is a %#@&#! up species. Maybe I should make that my motto for my signature! lol

HFG, .... Mr. Green Jean on Kapt. Kangeroo! are you from the Philly area? You triggered a flashback.. a good one though. How about... "Send your pictures to dear old Captain Noah, send today, send right away..." T I never did see my rainbow picture on that damn show. LOL. I'll date myself here but I remember as a child having an old B&W TV-- color TVs were out but my parents were really behind the times. (They didn't have cable until I was in college.--Thriller era ). We had to wedge a match pack behind the old UHF dial to watch the Wee Willie Wonka Cartoons Hour. Can you image a kids today only getting an hour of TV? Intolerable. Ah, the good old days, when the youngest had the honor of serving as the TV remote.

Sorry I digress yet again..

I don't have any more endearing T qualities to share. My T is human. We've had a few missed connections over the past 8 months but I've survived. She makes me mad sometimes, but usually Perna, Sky, Sunrise, Mouse, and others usually set me straight and I'm fine after that.

Something that really endears him to me is that he bought a water cooler a few months ago and hasn't set it up yet. It sits against one wall of his office, still in its box. He continues to provide bottled water for his clients out of his fridge. This is endearing to me because I do similar stuff so it makes me feel "twinned" to him. I have a hard time following through and can so see myself buying a new piece of "equipment" and letting it sit there untouched for months. I have wondered if I should offer to set up the cooler together with him during one of my sessions, but I decided he needs to get past this himself.

Okay, maybe I can answer this one now.

When he starts statements with, "I'll have you realize that . . .
He says it in a really calm tone. I love it.

When he rolls his sleeves up. He does it so quickly it's unbelievable, LOL.

Lately, he's been drinking CapriSuns in session. He looks like a kid doing it. It's too cute.

The way he puts up with me. What a job.

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mckell13 said:
HFG, .... Mr. Green Jean on Kapt. Kangeroo! are you from the Philly area? You triggered a flashback.. a good one though.

--- lol, no the midwest, it was on every morning , wasn't there a moose or something?

But you know when you had only so much TV to watch as a kid, you learned to do something else.

I have to add her phone calls. How I love her phone calls.

Yesterday I called twice, once sending the message 'urgent' only because of my phone malfunctioning. For some reason my phone rings back sometimes, doesn't disconnect. (I think my phone loves T too!). So it rang back and it was still 'recording' on her end and was asking me to choose how to send the message, 1 for normal, 2 for urgent... so i just chose urgent. Normally she doesn't even pick up her messages on weekends but she happened to yesterday. When she did, she called me to see if I was okay.

I just love her. The deal is she'll call if I ask. This is the 2nd time she's called when I haven't asked, to see if I'm okay. I have never felt so cared for in my entire life.