[silversky]

Hello guys,

I am debating whether or not I should go to therapy. Do I even need therapy? I am a 19 year old female. Just the whole thought of picking a therapist and making that phone call is so intimidating and causes much anxiety. Plus it’s expensive and I do not have my parent’s support.

They think the whole field of psychology is a crock and pseudo discipline.

There is no sudden turning point now but time itself. Time is passing and something needs to change soon. As for me, same girl with the same uncertainties, but now 19 instead of 15 or 16. Nothing changes. I feel a huge chunk of my life as passed me by. But I am worried as to what the following months will hold for me. I don’t think I will do well let loose. I am awkward and clumsy. How am I to fare in a real life career?

Where ever I go I feel disconnected and misplaced.

I was never one to cause any controversy. I continue to get some of the highest grades in my class with little effort. It is just a matter of un-motivation, procrastination, and then memorizing information a few days before the exam and getting an A.

Also,I have a painful (and quite strange I know) obsession with fingers for almost 3 years. I tug on them all the time and want to get them surgically lengthened. If you knew anything about this, it is not even a surgery on the market. (Ok body dysmorphic disorder can be added to my basket.)

Even when I was really young I would consider myself peculiar.

I think I might have Asperger’s syndrome or some other type of disorder with similar symptoms. Outside people have told me ALL my life since I was young that I need to speak up. When people came to me, I would avoid as much as I can.

It seems that naturally people have this compulsion that they just need speak and have to remember to be quiet. I have the opposite problem. It feels like I’m talking at a person instead of with them. When I make eye contact if feels as if I’m staring at them so I do it only sparingly.

I don’t know how to think or what to think anymore. It is this bottleneck effect I feel is in my brain. Recently when I drive to school I talk loudly to myself reading signs and passing plates so the speech centers in my brain don’t deteriorate from lack of use.

I really only have two friends that I keep in contact with. I sit on the computer for hours a day instead.

There is more but details can be cumbersome. Sorry this post is long but thank me it could be longer

[Christina86]

((((((((silversky))))))))))))

Welcome to PC

I'd say if you're thinking about getting therapy, that there is something in your life that you want to change and that therapy could prove to be useful.

I'm almost 22, and I started therapy through my university 3 years ago... so you're not alone in that regard.

Is there any way you could see a counsellor through your school, or find a place that has lower fees for students? There are many different places one can go for counselling if you don't have a lot of financial resources and don't want your parents involvement.

I wish you luck in finding someone to talk to!

[sidony]

Hey silversky!

Welcome to PC! And yes, definitely give therapy a try. Just getting a chance to talk about this kind of stuff would probably be helpful. I wish I'd had therapy when I was a teen. I did have a church counselor back then -- that was helpful but not really quite right for me. Figuring out interpersonal difficulties with a therapist has had an enormous positive impact on my life. I personally think everyone could benefit from it! And if you're having a hard time talking to folks (feeling like you're staring them down, etc.), it'd be a really good opportunity to practice having better interactions. And of course it's the perfect place to talk about things like body dysmorphic issues where you can figure out what that's about, etc. You're at a really stressful time in your life when you're about to be out in the "real world" and everyone needs help with that!!!

I think checking with the university is a good idea. I know a lot of universities will offer some counseling and won't be required to notify your parents.

For me, therapy was the best thing I ever did for myself. I strongly recommend giving it a try!!!

Take care,
Sidony

[ECHOES]

hi and welcome

It sounds like you want your life to be more comfortable in ways that therapy can help you with. Give it a try if it sounds right to you. There are always those who don't 'believe' in it. I mentione to my therapist that my family doesn't "get" therapy or the reasons for therapy. They say take a pill or get over it. My T said "Oh, families often don't 'get' therapy."

You are very aware and articulate and I think you would enjoy the intellectual as well as the emotional facets of therapy.

Therapy is something you do just for you. Your family doesn't even need to know you are in therapy. You can share that with those you feel comfortable sharing it with, or not share it.

[silversky]

Thank you guys for all your support. I go to a community college so they don't have those services but I will find my way somehow.

[krazibean]

Hi silversky.

I am also a 19 yr old female that goes to a community college, and let me say that i love therapy and i've made a lot of progress in the last 7 months.

My opinion is that everyone should be in therapy their whole lives. Even if there is nothing "wrong" with them, i think life is stressful. It is a journey and things are constantly coming up that you need support with. Therapy is the perfect place to deal with things and a healthy way to cope!

That being said, if you feel you might need to be in therapy, you probably do. If there is something you want to change about yourself or something you need help with, or coping with, therapy is a good outlet. I think you should go for it. I agree, it is hard to take the first step and make the call, go to the first apt, etc. but when you finally find someone you like and begin to trust them, let me tell you it feels amazing.

hope this helps

[Christina86]

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silversky said:
Thank you guys for all your support. I go to a community college so they don't have those services but I will find my way somehow.

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Bummer. Is there a health services or some place that can give you resources or places you might be able to call for discounted therapy?

Wishing you well ((((((((((silversky))))))))))))

[splitimage]

It's too bad therapy is so expensive, but some therapists will work on a sliding scale based on income - if you have a women's centre near you, they might know where you can get low cost councilling.

I love therapy. I honestly don't know where I'd be if I hadn't gotten into therapy when I did. I'd probably be dead. My family doesn't understand it either, but they don't have to it's my life. I spend a fortune on it every month because my insurance doesn't cover it, but to me it's totally worth every penny.

--splitimage