why???

<font color="green">Why are affirmations so hard? Why do I hate them so much?!? T seems to think they are wonderful but I hate them. I feel like a fraud standing around saying = I am a good person. I like me. etc etc. I feel as if I were lying. How can telling myselflies help? sighhhh. Did I mention I hate affirmations?</font>

Are there any affirmations that might be more accurate? Like telling yourself you are having a good day, it's been a good morning etc.,?

They aren't for everyone. I think they are ridiculous myself.

I remember talking with T about affirmirmations, how angry they make me feel. T said because they don't change the past? I think thats partly it but not the whole reason. It always seems to contrived and I am to consious of what it is I'm trying to do, and, and then it just seems ridiculas.

My T said similar to PsyChris. I couldn't do a lot of them and felt the same way so we went through and she wrote down some things that we agreed on together. Some examples of mine were things like: "I love my children." "I go to work even when I'm feeling bad." "I have a sense of humor." (I couldn't say I had a good one so we settled for that.) "I journal when I can." It helped me to see that there were some things I could agree on that were positive. Good luck with figuring out some that work for you.

Dalila, why do you have to work on affirmations? Could your T use some other techniques with you? I think I would have a hard time doing them too, as they would feel very fake, like lies, and contrived, like mouse said. The closest I have come to this is that in EMDR I have to give a positive statement about myself so we can rate how true I feel it is before and after the process. I have a hard time with this. The one I tend to use is "I am strong," because I really do believe that. But it would be deceitful and counterproductive to say things I didn't believe. Authenticity is a strong value in therapy for me and my T.

Like PsyChris said, maybe saying things that are more indirect but yet positive, might satisfy your T. Like one thing I said to my T last session was "It feels really good to be here."

<font color="green">The ideal is to replace the negative tapes positive ones and build some self confidence. While I am not DID I have a tendency to see everything in layers but they often just various levels of negativeness. I don't much like me - I feel as if i have nothing to offer to anyone so I have problems even offering much support here. My T is always telling me to believe in me and affirmations are one way to get there, or so she says.

I do know that my self talk can make a big difference in how I approach a challenge. And challenge is a good way to describe my life. Thank you for all the encouragement.</font>