I didn't know where to stick this, so I stuck it in general. If you think it belongs better somewhere else, feel free to move it.



Well, you see...

I'm applying for VESID and one of the things that you need as a part of your application is a psychiatric evaluation, signed by a psychologist. My counselor lady was very surprised actually that I havn't had anything remotely close to an evaluation of that sort since kindergarten. (In fact, I havn't even seen a school psycologist since elementary school...I guess my old school sucked at providing proper care to their students like me who were technicaly disabled...but still functional)

So...I most likely will have to get a psychiatric evaluation if she can't find any from my old school (which I highly doubt) I don't know why...but I'm really nervous about this. Tell too much...and the truth will be known...and while it would probably be most helpful for me... I don't know..this sort of information would get spread around to the people who work with me and probably my parents too and I'd like to maintain my image...I don't let on how I feel because of this. Wearing a happy face might not exactly be truthful 100% of the time... but it's a role that I'm happy to fill. If my parents...or anybody knew otherwise, they'd just ask questions that I don't want to answer. I understand why they would...they care... but they just don't know when to shut up when it comes to stuff like this sometimes.

On the other hand...if I lie...(which I can see myself doing) ...I'm not doing myself any favors either. Because if people don't know, then they can't help me. Simple as that.

This is of course, assuming ths happens. Which there is a realatively small likelihood that it wont'. But still.

(((kaika)))) imo always tell the truth

Yeah...I know what the right thing to do it...just scared to do it

[Christina86]

(((((((((((Kaika))))))))))))))

Eep! Yep, that would terrify me. Who wants to be labelled as anything, really... nobody, I'd bet. I'll hope you won't have to have one done... if so though, perhaps you can find a way to keep the info more private?

Well, I'm just worried about privacy more so then labels because...

1. I'm assuming the staff will know about anything because they'll need to transfer this information
2. If my parents ask, the psychologist is required to tell them because I'm 17 and technically not an adult yet
3. If the psychologist thinks I'm a danger to myself or others they are required to tell my parents anyways

^
So yeah, if I was comfortable with these guys knowing my problems I'd tell them to begin with!

Although...it should be interesting...I've been dying to hear a professional's opinion for so long now... regardless of whether or not the outcome proves either my suspicions or denials true.

This is of course, assuming that it happens...which I am going too seeing as how it is required and I don't ever remember having one.

[kameo1991]

Seems as though I wasn't as lucky as you... where they would just pass me by through out school. I had a teacher of mine tell a school counselor(s) that I was "invisible" in her class and then the other teachers all agreed. So that is how I ended up in the counselors office alot and ended up going through two different counselors, before finally seeing the school psychologist weekly (he travels between many high schools)

Anyhow, they do ask alot of questions and it seemed like I had to write alot. Somehow they got the idea I had a eating disorder, because I skipped lunch (went to library instead) everyday and for the entire year.

But yes they will find out personal things about you that perhaps you don't want anyone else to know.

If you think about it being evaluated isn't that bad.... afterwards! That is the only time I could relax. Just trying to be honest here, not to scare you or anything.

Kameo

I still don't know if it is going to happen...but it is necessary, and because I never recall having one, it is pretty much imminent..so expecting it to happen isn't too foolish. I just have to keep on reminding myself that even if people do find out it probably won't be as bad as I think because I think my fear of rejection is what is getting me so anxious about it to begin with. I gotta trust that my relationships that I've already established with people are strong enough to withstand anything not matter what they figure out...

and HEY! on the exciting note if everybody offline knew anyways I could actually invite some people who I know are having a hard time right now and I think could benefit from PC without having a panic attack!

[kameo1991]

Err.. I am always more worried about what the psychologist/counselors/teachers think of me. I could care less what other students think... or even friends or people I know. Remember, you don't have to tell everything if you are uncomfortable in doing so.

See I was a complete chicken... when I was told to go to the counselors office for the first time, I cringed and debated hiding out in a random bathroom (at the other end of the school.. which are more or less empty alot of the time) that thought and many others crossed my mind those next few minutes. It was very nerve-wracking to say the least.

Well good luck!

Well, I talked to my best friend online tonight a teeny, weeny bit of how I feel, not everything, you know? But She said she understood! And then I told her how I felt that if I told her then she'd be creeped out and then she says that she's lived in Ticonderoga and works at SEARS so nothing could creep her out. I feel a lot braver now.

She's also really concerned about me being bothered by my brother and that "if anyone needs an evaluation it's him, he needs help." I told her that he's like my dad and doesn't want any help and you can't involuntarily commit someone unless they are going to kill themselves or are a serious danger to your well being. But she says maybe because he is being mentally abusive... but even if that would work... nobody in my family would support my decision, I told her that too. I talk a lot about my brother to her and she says he sounds manic.

Anyways, the cool news it that I'm going over to her house next week so I don't have to deal with that crap anyways...at least for a few days

[Rapunzel]

What matters is that you get what you need to help you. Make the most of what they offer. I wished that someone would have cared enough to offer me help. I think they always figured I'd move on soon enough and become somebody else's concern. (Air Force brat) And I was too quiet to really be noticed most of the time, anyway.

[ewingrrl]

ooh, good luck... I dread my next intake cuz I always end up runnin my mouth. I know if I tell all I will get a more severe diagnosis... there are some things you just don't tell those people!

Plan carefully what you're gonna say! Remember, ghosts, spirituality, etc is taboo and will get an eyebrow raised... no tolerance.

[kameo1991]

Coming from someone like myself who didn't have a choice really in meeting with a psychologist(I let him know I didn't want to be there), but did have say in what I was willing to tell. I'd say honestly is the way to go. This probably is because I am so stubborn that I usually push help/people away. But I also have a strong fear of doing just that, which makes me reach out for them at the same time I'm pushing them away. Like I don't want to completely shut him out. Err... can't explain it.


What if they can help us? What if I'm wrong on denying everything and they are right? Those are questions I dreadfully ask myself everyday. I sometimes wish someone would just force me to accept that I need to be put on antidepressants, but again I don't have anyone who really cares enough that is close to me.

If there is even a tiny bit of "wanting to get better" left inside of you, honesty is the key!


...so are you gonna do it or what?

Well, it will either be:
#1: I don't need it because they found one on record
OR
#2: I need one. No real choice in the matter

Because it is required of me for VESID.
This is what it boils down to.

Maybe, just maybe it won't happen and I'm getting worked up for nothing. But you know, if not with an evaluation, but with possible therapy outside of school it's going to have to come up eventually.

I know what I should do, I know what I have to do, for my own sake. That is to be honest with them and myself. But when and if the day actually comes, I wonder if I will be able to do it...? for me, it is a frightening prospect because I know this information is going to be passed around amongst the adults (my teachers, probably my parents) they are all expecting me to be a normal person which...honestly I don't think I am most of the time. So unless the person ends up saying that I'm completely normal and fine and stuff...which is something I find to be completely invalidating...they are going to ask questions. it puts me in a tough spot.

(PS: i know exactly what you are talking about)

Mini update just to say that (surprise surprise) they didn't find any records of me having an evaluation at their school district. Because you know me telling them that I'm pretty sure I've never even had one to begin with every time it was mentioned wasn't evidence enough to deter them from poking around my records. Now she's going to poke around my other records...but I don't think any sort of psych evaluation from 5-13 years old is really um...relevant anymore now that I'm going to be 18...but hey!

Yep, that's pretty much it.

Kaika,
Let us know how things go!

[(JD)]

If it's standard, then make sure you have one. It won't show anything that you aren't dealing with anyway, and just might afford you more and better treatment.

One of the issues with not telling the truth is it will come back to bite you...some where down the line. This is for everyone. While you never really want everyone to know what issues you have had in life, if you hide them from employers, for example, and then because of an incident you become worse and they find out you had a history you failed to tell them about, not only can you lose your job, but you might also lose any benefits and health coverage for it too. Other employers will be less likely to hire someone in that situation also.
But if you do tell the truth, and they hire you anyway, and you do have some issues, they can't fire you because they knew ahead of time.
It's a tough one, but at your age I'd say be upfront and that will help you get the care you need, and maybe work through things before you need to be worrying about working or such.

That's true...it's something I plan on doing...it's just scary for me.

Anyways, the only time I ever remember being tested (besides the PLAN test) was in Kindergarten, and hopefully I have different mentality now then I did when I was five. unless my memory crapped out on me and I was tested later...but that's just my recollection.