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#1
May 04, 2009, 02:59 PM
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My T appointment is tomorrow! I stayed home from work today because I don't feel 100%. My throat hurts a little, and I called my dr. but he's booked up today. I don't want to postpone my T appt. but maybe I should.
My concerns seem to dissipate when I actually see my T. I mean, I felt so strongly about some incidents that happened a few weeks ago, and that's what I want to talk about. Issues relating to feelings of rejection and loving myself. But I don't think I can "feel the feelings" when I'm there. I sometimes gloss over feelings when I'm sitting in the session, and I don't want to do that. This session is very important to me, and I want to get the most out of it. I'm so afraid I will just "report" the facts to her instead of getting to my feelings, which are by now buried. Does this make any sense? I won't see her again for a few months, so there's a lot at stake. I can always call if I'm distressed afterwards, though. If I felt up to par, I'd be more anxious about my session. I'm spacing out, will maybe take a nap. Maybe my dr. will call back and let me come in today. 
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#2
May 04, 2009, 03:35 PM
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(((((( rainbow )))))) sounds situation normal for me... every session...
if you feel a cold coming on you could get some pineapple juice - your body can't store Vitamin C, so you can take in all you want and it will be gone tomorrow but maybe knock out a cold on the way. be well 
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#3
May 04, 2009, 06:00 PM
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Im sorry you're feeling anxious and unwell - rest today and take care of yourself so that you wil be better for tomorrow - just a thought - I somtmes get cold like symptoms when I ma going throuhg tough stuff in therapy .
Hope it all goes well - let us know ok 
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts  its how many times you get back up!   (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture  )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#4
May 04, 2009, 07:02 PM
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I can totally relate to what you're feeling....
2 sessions ago, I brought some serious past SA to the surface...and I was filled with anxiety for days afterwards. During my last session, I tried to bring it up - but couldn't - and afterwards I felt awful because I felt like I wasted the session tip-toeing around what I really needed to address. I hope you feel better soon. Get a good night's rest, drink plenty of fluids...and hopefully you'll be able to make it to your appt....
__________________
Don't follow the path that lies before you. Instead, veer from the path - and leave a trail... 
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#5
May 04, 2009, 07:08 PM
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I came home from work today because I didn't feel well, too. And they are all paranoid about the Swine Flu. Honest, it's just a cold I have... Anyway, I considered cancelling my appointment tonight. For one, to be considerate to T and not give her my cold. Then I remembered that she often has a tissue in hand, so who knows maybe I got this there. She was fine with it and the session was fine too. I had less energy for resistance  I hope you feel better soon! |
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#6
May 04, 2009, 07:50 PM
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Thanks for the replies. I feel okay, not great. I should have rested all day but I didn't. Now I'm starting to panic big time, about seeing my T after so long. After reading the posts about crying in therapy, wanting to go in, look at her and cry just because I've missed her. Knowing I'll probably just sit there, and stumble over my words instead. I've tried not to "rehearse". I don't want to know what's going to happen. I'm afraid I want it to be emotional but it won't be, and then I'll be disappointed.
The problem is that therapy for me has been too much about my relationship with my T. I need to have a middle ground tomorrow. I've got to talk about my issues, but I also have to acknowledge my attachment to my T. Usually one or the other predominates. Last time I was totally "adult", talking about a particular issue. I so much want to feel connected to her, but not enough to make me miserable when I leave. It's not fair to expect so much from one session. We both know that, but of course I'm the one who has to live with the outcome. It's like a performance to me. I want it to go perfectly, but it won't because it's real life, not a play. I've got all these strong emotions inside, but they won't come out, and they aren't even appropriate for my T. I want to stay focused and mindful, but not rigid. I don't want to recite facts. Maybe I should tell her what I posted here, right away, so she can head me in the right direction. She will tell me to relax, breathe, and slow down! She always used to tell me to slow down, and stop spinning my wheels. Okay. I'm breathing. It will be good tomorrow. It will be good tomorrow.
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 sittingatwatersedge
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#7
May 04, 2009, 09:19 PM
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rainbow8 I hope that your session goes well tomorrow.
__________________
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#8
May 05, 2009, 07:28 AM
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Good luck, Rainbow!
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#9
May 05, 2009, 07:38 AM
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How did it go?
__________________
Its not how many times you fall down that counts its how many times you get back up! (Thanks to fenrir for my Picture )When you have come to the edge of all light that you know and are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing One of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly. by Patrick Overton, author and poet |
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#10
May 05, 2009, 09:16 AM
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Have you gone yet?? If so, was it good?
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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