[NuckingFutz]

i may be posting a lot until i kick out my abusive roommate. There is no kind side to this man...that was an act of manipulation to win over me and my neighbors. He did not even ask to stay, just stayed more and more. He's homeless because he would rather spend his money on dope. All his friends do dope. He chose me because he thought i was an easy mark and i will admit, i am until i get mad. I am raging mad! I cannot wait until tuesday night when he leaves. The tension in the house is palpable. I am taking my klonopin regularly just to function. He works both days so i will barely see him. I hoped i could heal from that suicide attempt in peace. But with your permission, i hope you do not mind me coming here to rant under this post until i can breath a big sigh of relief on tuesday night. Love, nuckingfutz

Hey rant away ......

I will read it !

[NuckingFutz]

was getting ready for work today. My state id card are missing. Last time i saw them they were on the bed when i was unpacking. I have looked everywhere and in all my pockets...even looked through his stuff. Then it occurred to me...maybe in his wallet. I found another id with his stuff and unless he turned into a white woman over night, it is not his. I hate criminals. I have one place left to check...his wallet tonight when he is sleeping. I hate doing that, but i need to check for peace of mind...does that sound crazy?

[AAAAA]

I’m glad to hear that you’re standing up for yourself and taking your life back. Just out of curiosity, what made you decide to give him 40 hours to leave? Based upon what you’ve said that’s just giving him time to ransack the place before he goes. I’ve taken in my fair share of “strays” and I’ve learned the hard way it’s best to say enough is enough and it’s time for you to leave. If you think there will be a problem, call the police and have him removed. Good luck, please let us know how it turns out.

[NuckingFutz]

he leaves on a trip to washington tomorrow night. I am not telling him he is no longer welcome here. He is not on the lease, he does not have a key. People like him prey on vulnerable people. Well, he preyed on the wrong one. I would not hesitate to kick him out now, but then he would cancel his trip and try and work on me some more...then i would have to call the police. This way i can talk to my t and find the best way to do it. I really don't need the stress right now. If he does come back, i do call the cops, and addicts hate cops. I hope this answers the question. Bottom line is that i will feel safer telling him when he is safely in another part of the country. Love, nuckingfutz

[AAAAA]

Oh that does make a difference. That sounds like a very intelligent way of doing things. Will he have any property left in your home when he takes his trip? Has he given you any indication as to whether or not he plans to return to your home? It sounds like you’ve got a firm grasp on things.

[Yoda]

Post all you need. I will be here.

If you need somebody to talk to PM me your telephone number and I can PM you mine and you can call me anytime some support.

Hang in there. You are making a positive move.

[NuckingFutz]

thanks for the support! Never know when i will need it. As soon as my roommate came home, i started going through everything again. I asked him if he had seen it...he immediately offered to help me find it. If they are found, guess who will find them? Hmmmm. He's acting nice so at least tonight won't be bad...will keep you posted. Love, nf

[0ldsoul]

Good luck,

I hope all goes smoothly, its never nice being taken advantage of.

You deserve more.

0ldsoul

What a cheeky bugger he is ! Good luck I know you can do this !

[NuckingFutz]

thanks. He has stuff here but will arrange to put his stuff outside or come and get it. He knows he has screwed up and is trying to suck up...unfortunately for him i know it is an act and will not work. I just can't be around his drugs and his druggie streetwise friends. Will keep you posted on what t says @ our session tomorrow.

[NuckingFutz]

12 hour delay. I sure am glad i have a therapist to run this by...the words to use, precautions to take. I deserve to have a drug free home. Keep me in your prayers?

[NuckingFutz]

and he's gone! The goodwill sheets are off my big beautiful plush couch, i reclaimed my make up mirror and put it in a sunny place on window and had fun putting it on. I had my cousins cd playing. The cats didn't get stuck in the hot sun! I got a lot of complements on my looks. And i got approved for long term counseling after my suicide program counseling is over. And then...i came home to the sound of silence as i felt jade and cymbalta's furry little bodies rub up against me in hello...sigh

[Rmdctc]

so glad you were able to get him out. I hope he doesnt come back.

[NuckingFutz]

i will not even open the door to him! If he calls i say i can't talk. Can't even wrestle with my guilt. But right now i am enjoying my peace. love, nucking futz

[0ldsoul]

good for you!

It must be a new found peace. Good luck

[NuckingFutz]

thanks! Decided to put off the major cleaning and have scheduled it for this weekend. I am still exhausted from having to deal with him. Can anyone relate? Need cyber hugs too. love, nuckingfutz

[0ldsoul]

on thier way

Originally Posted by NuckingFutz

thanks! Decided to put off the major cleaning and have scheduled it for this weekend. I am still exhausted from having to deal with him. Can anyone relate? Need cyber hugs too. love, nuckingfutz

[Elysium]

Just wondering.....

Does the CH know that he has officially been banned from returning? Does he have a clue, or is he going to show back up on your doorstep expecting to "come home"?

I hope he gets it and just doesn't even bother. I'm just worried he's going to give you a difficult time....

Take care!!

[NuckingFutz]

he does not know. T said to tell him when he calls. She said if he just shows up to tell him when he does, not to even to open the door...to tell him through the door. Never had a key, and even if he had one made, it does not have a key to this lock. You know he never asked to stay...he just stayed and stayed. I did not tell him to leave because he was not doing the drug, he was helpful around the house, he charmmed my neighbors, he actually helped with the bills. T said these were all manipulations. I need to take of myself, and this is how i am going to it. I will not give him a chance to manipulate me again. I will offer no excuses and will not listen to any of his. I will use the broken record technique. I have my bases covered. T said these people are very paranoid and are afraid of the law and especially of jail because once they are in jail...no more crack! T says coming down off this drug is like someone with depression or bipolar hitting their worst depression. Go to crackreality.com for more info.

[AAAAA]

I would offer one suggestion. If he still has property at your house I would contact your local police station and ask them how to deal with this situation. Different states have different laws, some states give unwelcome guests a lot of rights. Try to deal with this before he comes back. Since you stated that he helped with the bills, even though you may not consider this “rent” it can be construed as such depending upon the state that you’re in.

If you report his stuff as abandoned property now you’re covering your bases.

[NuckingFutz]

now i am scared. I do not know what is in his stuff. I do not know when he is coming home. Right now i am not feeling very strong about this. :-(

[AAAAA]

Stick to your guns but cover your bases so that you’re not surprised later. Make a phone call to the local police non-emergency number, anonymously if it makes you feel more comfortable. Let them know that you had a temporary guest that has left and will be unwelcome if/when he returns. Ask them how you go about disposing of his abandoned property. Some places you have to hold it for as little as a week, others as long as 90 days. Do document whom you spoke to.

They will not house the property, they will only tell you what you need to do to protect yourself legally.

If the police tell you that you must give him x amount of days to pick up his property, contact him and say something like your landlord has discovered that you have an unauthorized tenant and if he doesn’t leave you will be evicted.

[NuckingFutz]

okay...when i get to a working phone at pdocs tomorrow. I went through his stuff. Tossed the porn and drug stuff though because i doubt he would report that missing and only would serve to get me in trouble. When i when i went to the hospital, i gave him my phone because i couldn't talk and so he could call me and also to contact family. I found out last night that he contacted no one including my neighbors. Everyone had to ask. This from someone who has apparently been acting friendly towards me and my neighbors to gain our trust. This man will not cross my door again. I just relised that he was part of the of the issues that drove me to the attempt. I feel stronger now and half done with cleaning the house. I also glad you all are here! Cyber hugs needed.

[AAAAA]

(((Hugs to you!))) I'm proud of you, just trying to make it so you have less friction later.