[sparkles]

Hi,
I'm not sure how its going with my bf. It seems like we're going further and further apart, or at least I'm realising we're more and more incompatible with each other, but usually I can't stop myself seeing him. Usually we get sexual in some way. But it ends up with me feeling hurt.
It's hard to explain what is happening, but he gets really annoyed with me. Thoughout the months its varied with reactions like, he wants to be left alone, he's walked out of my apartment, etc, ie. in he just feels like he cant stand me, yet he usually asks me to come back, and promises that it'll get better. But we don't really have anything there. I mean we talk about some things and he's understanding sometimes, but I don't know what we have anymore. I feel like he gets frustrated with me unreasonably, or that if its so frustrating, why does he even want to be with me. I don't feel very appreciated when it's like that. I feel like I can't even explain that fully to him sometimes incase he gets offended. It feels like I have to hold back my words because he gets moody. And then he says im stressing him out, so I've never just been able to say it straight. I said that i was sad because we hadn't gone out many times in so many months, its always my house or his house, or close by the house, it feels kinda like its just convenient for him or something, and he doesn't make an effort to ask to hang out with me or take me out, more like some kinda takeaway service that he orders in.
I feel sad. And I don't feel happy or appreciated in this relationship.
in my last relationship I was underappreciated also, should I just spend time alone? I'm also depressed sometimes, I don't even feel like trying to find another guy or another relationship.

[thaboyfriend]

its really hard to say what his issues are without knowing his background. It sound like hes young and not sure if he wants to be in a relationship, but yet still loves you. Thats very common with young men. The not going out thing, well thats common among guys from the hood (i don't know if he is), but i don't like to go out alot, and my girl trips just like you, but some men are like that and some are not. You need to decide if you happy in the relationship. if you are your gonna have to accept him for who he is, if you not try to move on. i hope this helped!

[Miracle1986]

(((((sparkles)))))

[sparkles]

Thanks for the reply! Yeah we are quite young i guess, 20 something. Yeah, I mean he keeps telling me he only does sports really, and he has some excuses alot of times, but he did make an effort to go out with me anyway when I reminded him that I mean literally we've only been out once in a few months or so ... I think I'm happier cos I talked to him a bit now, he's really sweet sometimes. I don't know if I can stand the changes in his mood or the way he can be sometimes, but I guess I'll work it out. Thanks for the advice and support! Thanks for the hug Manda

[jerrymichele]

I'm sorry that your upset. A lot of guys don't know how to talk to women. Meaning they really don't understand what you mean. You should try and talk to him about what your feeling. You can't blow up on him or he won't listen, not that I'm saying that you are. Only blow up when you tell him 15 thousand times and ask him if he's stuck on stupid. lol Really it sounds like you miss being with him, and he won't spend any quality time with you. You have got to tell him. Tell him that it's not asking to much if the two of you go out once a week or something like that. And when you go over to each others house don't always give into him. If you feel like your being taken advantage of then put your foot down.

[RomanSunburn]

It's kind of funny that you posted this... I've been going through this same thing wth my boyfriend.. Only... I'm the one being moody and causing problems... I'll be honest, I can't tell you why. There are some nights where I just get so frustrated with him, sometimes for reasons I dont even know myself. I have a tendency to pick fights at 2 in the morning after he's been asleep for a few hours... I really dont know how to control myself, or even what I want from him or what I even want from myself... But anyways, I'm babbling now. I dont really have any advice to offer, since I'm looking for some myself... But I wanted to let you know, I hear you, and I'm sorry youre going through this. It also helped me think more about what I'm putting my boyfriend through, so.. Thanks.

Best wishes, and I hope everything works out for you
Ro

[gagirlinpc]

Mood swings, not going out??? That sounds so familiar to me. It is really hard to be in a relationship where you enjoy going out, and I mean ANYWHERE as long as it isn't the couch and the other one says no. That has bothered me in my relationship so much. My boyfriend has NO idea how that bothers me. How it makes me feel like I have had to eliminate the idea of us having fun anywhere. It sucks......

[babydoll233]

Hi, I am sorry you are having these issues. The bottom line is you need to be happy, that is all it is. If you feel stressed out, unappreciated, not loved or used, then it's no good, be by yourself. He sounds like he doesnt know what he wants, and if it isnt you, then you have to move on. All relationships take hard work and you BOTH have to work at them, if you really think he is worth it, then you need to sit down and communicate that, if he hesitates in any way, then you need to move on... life is way to short to be feeling unloved, good luck, i will send good thoughts your way!