How to flirt?

I have noticed that now that I am losing weight I have been gaining some attention from the opposite sex. Either that or I have t.p. on my shoe all the time LOL.

I haven't had this happen except for losers and don't know how to react. I have had this happen with some nice looking respectable looking types and want to flirt back but don't know how.

So how do you flirt?

Jan

The best way to flirt is to be suttle and demure. If there is a a guy you are interested in, tilt your head when you talk to him, touch your hair from time to time. When he says something funny and you laugh, touch him lightly on the arm or shoulder. Learn about what interests him, and study up a bit. Men love it when women show an interest in their pastimes and hobbies. and When you end your conversation and are walking away, make sure you glance back and smile.

If he has half a brain and is truly interested in you, he will get the hint and will want to pursue you (in a good way) Have fun but limit flirting to guys that you are really interested in. You do not want to send these signals to the wrong guy and have to hurt his feelings later on.

Congradulations on your accomplishments with your weight, and keep up the good work! Best of luck out there!!!

Belive deep dwon that you are kind, respectable, loving, well rounded, if you truly believe all this deep down, then you will attract a man who truly loves you and all you have to offer! Throw in a little about YOURSELF into the conversation too, think of things that interest _you, because you matter, beautiful!

I don’t think flirting is something that can be forced. I think when find someone interesting you smile naturally, laugh automatically whether you want to or not. I think Junerain had the right idea, be yourself.

FASCINATING!!!!

But I agree with Junerain.

I'll note one thing. Don't start flirting with just anyone. You may find that your 'new you' attitude is looking for a guy to flirt with and date. You may jump on the first boat that floats by. However, you also may not look carefully into what is needed in terms of the person you flirt with - seeing their true self. Are they a great person or is your desire to flirt and land a potential boyfriend spreading the fishing net too widely? In business terms - sometimes we say "it's a solution looking for a problem."

Be careful - as someone with a new "skill" is always looking for a problem to solve with it. Tread carefully and look for potential mates who would be good friends first (in my opinion) rather than a "boyfriend".

In high school I was so "eager" to date. Never did. In college, friends introduced me to various girls and I was not filtering and just going for it. Things I didn't learn from my mother (raised only-child by an older mom) were social skills and ability to read people - she was kind of a hermit herself and didn't teach me much. So, any girl was fine with me whether mean-spirited, too young, too old, etc. I wouldn't trade my life for anyone else and I learned a lot - but I will say that I had some events in my life I would surely want to not experience again and definitely wouldn't with the "brain I have now".

I need to clarify, I am not saying to be deceptive or misleading. Yes nature has a process of attraction, but sometimes guys (like me for example) are very shy and need a bit of encouragement. Something to let them know you really want to get to know them better, thats all.

Just be yourself and smile and enjoy. Look who's talking though, been married over 23 years, and the closest I came to attracting another male was Wednesday in church when an eight year was sleepy and wanted to cuddle to keep warm and sleep. His mother wouldn't let me take him home though.

This is so sweet. My bf he would flirt with me, but he never would ask me out. I had to ask him if he would like to go hang out with me. lol, I even had to tell him that I loved him first.

Jbug I tend to agree with Bonaire. When you date you don't want to just settle for any one man. When I was dating back in the day, I would date a couple of guys at the same time, but that doesn't mean sleep with them either. Just go out and have fun.

i always thought flirting came naturally for women . lol ... being a bit shy myself i think you should be careful how much charm u turn on .... but let your real self come out be fun and have fun...... caution is always advised when dealing with your heart and others hearts... best of luck and congradulations on your new lighter self....

Thanks guys for all your help.

I am thinking about trying out your tips next week on this guy my Aunt was telling me about at Borders. He works there and she said he was very friendly and she told me what he looks like and then we thought about what I could ask for help with. I said what about help with a cookbook since I like to cook and just saw the Julie/Julia movie so am thinking about that line.

So what do you think about that. It would be a safe environment he is working so he shouldn't be able to hurt me but I would be able to practice flirting.

Jan

Let your inner beauty shine, and you will be noticed, trust me!

Not sure if I wrote this before in this thread or another but use the Zen koan of "expect nothing ... be prepared for anything".

The Borders guy in fact may have a girlfriend now but may flirt innocently with you but nothing may come of it. At that point - keep on going and don't be discouraged - it's not a "no" it's a "I can't" type situation. Then again - he may not have a gf and things go great (crossing fingers).

I've found that women and men are more open to experience new relationships than I ever thought. The disapointing part of my life has been what may be a low-level agoraphobia which came from my upbringing - to assume someone isn't interested in me and I shut down. My mother called me "shy" and I call it "debilitating". I never learned that "No" meant "try again". No just means "keep going". Just as racers don't quit racing when they lose a race - we can't quit looking for experiences in life when we hear "No".

You can even ask someone out just for practice expecting a no. The best part of being hurt (carefully) is it can make you stronger. There is a good learning experience in disapointment as long as you're "ready for anything".

Somethings I've never done in my life. Never asked for a raise. Never asked a girl to go out with me. Things just happened. I'm married (imagine that!) and my wife was the one who urged me to get engaged (oh lots of words to write about that)...