[nothemama8]

I think what has happened is a failure in communications
In my opinion a few ppl have given constructive support to a person and gotten attacked for this
If we have to walk on egg shells here why even post, techniclly we are enableing the person if we candy coat things just so they feel good
I for one am insulted that one person can manipulate soooo many threads on this forum
I too have feelings as do others
Angie

[wi_fighter]

I agree.

Just because we don't all wear our hearts on our sleeve at all times and APPEAR to have things held together, the truth is that many of us are just as close to falling apart as some of the more likely suspects in these forums.

And saying that some of us are viewed as lacking compassion and our suggestions are not appreciated could be the thing that sends us seemingly "held together" people spiraling into our own pit of despair.

[sqrlb8]

It seems a fair consideration to me to examine the benefit/burden ratio in relation to a member's activities here. Sure everyone has a right to participate and receive support, but if it consistently means alienation and offense to many, is it still worth anything? How many people should suffer so one can have their way? How many people should be asked for restraint to accomodate the excessiveness of one?

I'm sure these aren't easy issues to administer around on a site like this, and I have respect for those who are trying so hard. But it's also fair to be able to question the situation to eachother in this way.

Two cents from a sqrl. What might that be worth at current exchange rates? Sqrls are so bad at math.

[Shaymus]

It doesnt seem like so difficult a thing to me. Some people rub me the wrong way as well. Do i walk on eggshells with em? Nope, i just dont reply to their posts unless i can restrain myself. If i dont feel like restraining myself i just dont post in their thread. There are lots of people here i do get along well with so its never a problem. If only real life was like that id probably be slightly more sane.

[nothemama8]

bump

[nothemama8]

Thanks for the input Shirley, Sgrl, and Shay, it means alot
Angie

[MacD]

Angie...I agree...we have to stand up and take the medicine that we ask for when we publicly ask for input...and recognize that though we may not agree w/ the responses we receive...that doesn't make them wrong...Let's keep the communication open and flowing...(& maybe develop another layer of skin for the occaisions when we receive feedback that WE FIND hurtful)...much love....grace

[Wants2Fly]

What Shaymus said.

[SeptemberMorn]

If you're talking about the locked thread, there was no miscommunications there. It was obvious what the intent of some people was, and that was to ingenuinely help someone to leave the board.

That wasn't EVEN nice, much less supportive. Like Shay said, only he said it much nicer... if you can't support then shut up!

[Kathyanita]

I've been here long enough to allow myself an opinion:
I believe I have seen some occasions of "bait and switch" and I have been able to not take the bait. Then when the switch happens that allows one to be defensive - I'm not ripped off because I wasn't in it. So I agree with the advice of avoiding where it smells like bait is being offered.

[SeptemberMorn]

Just a comment on your comment, if it's okay.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
maybe develop another layer of skin for the occaisions when we receive feedback that WE FIND hurtful

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

For some time now, I've been "trying on" any hurtful comment that's made to me, especially if it's an opinion of me. If I find that there may be a smidgen of truth, I try to correct it. If I don't feel there's any truth to it, but rather, just a misdirected putdown, I don't mind adding that layer of skin.

[jmo531]

*********************HI-JACK IN PROGRESS******************************

I struggled with replying to this thread. I feel that I need to however.

Yesterday, after reading the post's in the other thread I became very disturbed about the obvious unsupportive comments that had been made to Angel. So much so, that I felt compelled to reply and make my feelings known. (If you knew me, you would know that getting angry is a last resort.)

I have a hard time getting to the point so bare with me...I'm getting there. LOL

I like everyone here. I have never had a problem with anyone. I have grown closer with some more then others but I think that it to be expected. I try my hardess to be as supportive, loving and offer whatever advice I can in any post that I reply to. I guess, being the type of person that I am, I find it easier and more productive to show love and support rather then "Tough Love".

I have grown very fond of AG over these past few months for several reasons. Not only has she supported me when I have needed her, she has shown me what friendship is about. I find Angel to be a very kind, sensative, gentle person who hurts very deeply. I understand her pain and try to offer my support, love and hugs to her when ever I can.

I do find it very hurtful when ppl go out of their way to be nasty and inconsiderate of other ppl's feelings. I just dont think it is necessary.

Angie, I have come to know you as a very kind person and I like who you are. So much in fact, after that post I PM'd you and apologized because I didnt want your feelings to be hurt and I still dont. I in turn PM'd Pat and try to explain my point of my post as well because I think it good to be open and honest and discuss matters rather then, NOT discuss them. I try my hardest to stay neutral on matters but I feel like I have been put in a position to pick sides and I dont like that feeling at all. I may be the one who has caused myself to feel that way so I will take responsibility there. I want to be clear here so there is no mistaking what I am trying to say.
I like it here, I like the people here. I like the fact that we can offer love and support when needed. What i dont think is needed is cheap shots, pettiness, and unkind comments. I think we all get enough of that IRL.
I am fond of you Angie. I am also fond of Pat. I just hope that this does not change our relationship because of this post.
I must express what my heart tells me and right now, my heart tells me that AG needs me to be there for her because she is hurting.
If I could ask for anything out of you guys it would be to think before you post. Think how you would feel if you received the comments you make to AG. It hurts. Let's just all wipe the slate clean and start anew. We all have the right to be here and to be supported. Sometimes, some ppl need it more then others and thats OK. There is enough of us here to go around. Love to all of you.

[oksomaybeimnuts]

Thank you (((Jen))) for such a thoughtful sensitive post.

[jmo531]

(((((((((((((Karen))))))))))))))))