Trying to Figure Things OUt

I am new here, searching desperately for some help. I was just diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder 6 months ago. I have been divorced longer than I can remember but have been seeing someone for a year and a half. Well, when i came home from the hospital, he ended up leaving me because he couldn't deal with me any longer. I was totally withdrawn and depressed and over medicated. After a month apart, I started feeling much better from a med change. By then he had gone out with someone else much younger than I. We talked and he has come back but I am a rapid cycler and I am having so many misgivings right now and feeling obsessed over his date and mutual sexual relationship with this other woman. I live in fear that something else is about to happen...that he won't be able to handle me again. Or that he will use it as an excuse to go back out with her. He is not like that but my mind will not give me a break from the thoughts triggered by the disorder. Can anyone help me?

((((((((((((shayla)))))))))))))))))

welcome!!!!

((((((((((((((((SHAYLA))))))))))))))))

i'm sorry that your life isn't going very well right now. what meds are you on? you know we have a bi-polar forum here. i have bi-polar and our group is very supportive of each other. i'm glad that your meds have smoothed out your moods somewhat. hang in there...i don't know what to tell you about the boyfriend. is he also seeing the other woman now? have you been able to discuss your fears with him? xoxo pat

You have to talk things out. If he is willing to stick around, then he probably should discuss this with you and your T or pdoc so he knows it's a real disorder and he has to be there to support you when you need it most!

It's ok for him to say no, now. It's ok for you to say no, also. Take care of YOU, ok?

I really appreciated all the replies I got. I am on Lithium, Seroquel, Lexapro, and Trazadone. While they do help they cannot completely keep me from dipping into the darkness of depression. I am much better. As far as the relationship, he is not seeing her intimately right now but really that is not my problem. I think my disorder makes me have thoughts and feelings that have no basis. And he is afraid of me because I am B/P. He is afraid I will get him involved and then just up and leave so he is acting different which makes the insecurities grow. It is like a never ending battle. I am glad to know I have people who will listen and understand.