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#1
Nov 28, 2009, 01:42 PM
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hi i got a weird problem and i was hoping maybe someone can give me some advice cause there's really nobody i can talk to about it. im bi and i think i'm starting to get feelings for my best friend. i'm marryed and my wife knows i'm bi. she's ok with me looking at stuff online but not doing stuff with anybody for real and i dont want to cheat on her anyway. its always just been sexual like i dont think i could fall in love with another man like how i love my wife but this is different with my friend. he's been my best friend for about five years and i never thought of him as any different then that but i seen him on thanksgiving and can't stop thinking about him that way since. i can't tell my wife cause she'll freak out and i can't tell him. i'm afraid to tell my therapist cause my wife comes to therapy with me once a month and i got a feeling she'd want me to talk about it with my wife anyway. i really hope it just goes away but i don't know if this stuff does. i don't know what to do
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#2
Nov 28, 2009, 03:18 PM
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well, you have a therapist who knows you, so i think you should schedule at least one appointment alone. i hope your wife understands this and will let you go, because you seem to need to get everything out.
best of luck to you! |
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#3
Nov 28, 2009, 05:09 PM
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I think that you should tell your therapist. Tell your thearpist your not ready to tell your wife yet. I seem to think that your going to need to work on these feelings, so no one gets hurt.
__________________
Live in the moment. Right now is the only thing we really have.  |
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#4
Nov 28, 2009, 05:37 PM
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I am bi too and it is natural to be attracted to people. But choosing to act on those feelings is up to you. If you want to stay happily married to your wife you know you cannot have an intimate relationship with anybody else, male or female.
It is okay though to have fantasies. I think sometimes the fantasies are better than the real sex anyways.
__________________
The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honorable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well. anonymous |
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#5
Nov 28, 2009, 09:11 PM
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It would be positive to talk about it. Anything you say in confidence to your therapist (clarify that) does not leave the room. You indicated that your wife only comes once a month. If your therapist knows you are bi then this will not be surprising to him/her and should open things up for a real good decision. Trust your therapist.
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Phoenix47 |
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#6
Nov 30, 2009, 07:45 PM
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thank you for writing back. now that if i've said it i realize i'm being a jerk and i gotta be a adult and just get it out of my head and pay attention to how good i got it. i think i'm gonna talk to my therapist about it though.
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#7
Dec 03, 2009, 12:14 PM
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((((((((((((Sincity))))))))))))
I agree with the others talk to our therapist about it but clerfiy you want it to stay between you and your therapist and not your wife Sending peaceful thoughts Typo |
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