Difficulty hating/judging religious people

DivideByZero · Jan 03, 2010, 03:58 PM

I have a _huge_ chip on my shoulder against all forms of religion. I know this is a problem.. I can't even have a conversation with a person that is religious without wanting to attack their beliefs. It is horrible.

I don't want to hurt anyone, I need some tips on how to just sit with the feelings of revulsion at the beliefs and recognize the human under the beliefs even if I don't like what they are doing. I want to be nicer/kinder to all people regardless of their beliefs. Anger is just killing me at the moment and I am such a hypocrite because one of the worst parts of religion is the polarized morality and judgement and I just do the same thing that I hate, but under a different banner.

How do I start being kinder/gentler to people that I have real difficulty dealing with?

lynn P. · Jan 03, 2010, 04:17 PM

Where do you think this anger is coming from? Is it because you feel some religions have set rules, therefore excluding some people? Do you believe in God, but just prefer not to be bound by the religious group itself? I was raised a particular religion but struggle accepting some things and as a result, I really don't feel I belong to one particular group, but I do believe in God and try to be a good person. All we can do is be responsible for ourselves and we have to accept there are many different beliefs in the world and they may conflict with your beliefs. You could agree to disagree - maybe that would help. This is a very interesting topic - do you think the anger comes from not feeling accepted by certain groups? Some say fear is behind anger and one should ask themselves - what am I afraid of? Sorry for all the questions, but I'm very curious why people become angry about religion too sometimes. I have, several times become defensive when I feel one group is judging the other and I'm working on that issue myself, so I'll be observing this thread hoping to learn from it.

Rapunzel · 06:00 PM

First of all, I would like to thank you for being open, honest, and willing to work on this problem. That you can recognize the problem is a first step and shows that you are recognizing that you have a bias, rather than that 'all religious people are bad.'

Lynn makes a good point about understanding where your anger is coming from. I am a religious person and I don't believe that I have ever done anything harmful to you. Most likely, either someone has hurt or offended you in some way, or perhaps you were taught to hate religion by someone who was hurt or offended or taught to hate religion. When you over-generalize this hate to all religious people, you are transferring feelings from a situation from your past when you felt this way for one reason or another to a new situation based on a single cue that reminds you of the past situation(s). One word for this is transference. Another is stereotyping, or discrimination.

Stereotyping based on religion is very similar to stereotyping based on race or gender or any other trait that could define a group of people. While I don't know your experience and how your bias developed, I know a few general theories that explain prejudice. George Kelly http://webspace.ship.edu/cgboer/kelly.html theorized that people categorize the world in dichotomous categories, starting with the basic construct of good / bad. We tend to group things (or people) up into categories. Sometimes we make errors and need to reconstrue our mental map of the world. Sometimes our constructs can be too tight, and do not readily admit new items or experience. If your construct is "All religious people are hateful and judgemental" then it will be hard for you to accept that people can be religious but not hateful and judgemental. Changing our personal constructs is disorienting and we tend to resist it, but it can be done, especially when we are aware of the contructs that we want to change.

In other words, maybe open yourself to the possibility that there are religious people who are accepting and kind to others. Look for them. Try to accept them. (I hope you will be able to see me as religious and also accepting, kind, and nonjudgemental).

Maybe it would be hard for you to jump in and discuss religion with me, but if you can start small and get to know people who are religious as people, find things that you have in common with them (people are generally more alike than different), etc., it would help you to form new constructs such as maybe:
"some religious people have similar concerns about the environment as I do"
"some religious people do their best to be good friends, neighbors, parents, ..."
"some religious people enjoy some of the same sports or books or leisure activities that I do."
You probably get the idea. It isn't really different from how someone might overcome a prejudice against people of any race or culture, etc. When we get to know people as individuals, steotypes fall away.

The other theorist who stands out in understanding prejudice is George Allport. He describes "pigeonholes of the mind" into which we try to make everything fit. Here's a nice summary:

Quote:

The Nature of Prejudice

Featuring Material from:

Allport, Gordon W. The Nature of Prejudice. Reading, MA: Addison-Wesley, 1979

Framework

Man is not born prejudiced; rather, prejudice is learned. By its very nature, prejudice denies individual human dignity and breaks the fundamental unity among people. Gordon W. Allport defines prejudice as a hostile attitude or feeling toward a person solely because he or she belongs to a group to which one has assigned objectionable qualities. Allport stresses that this hostile attitude is not merely a hasty prejudgment before one knows the facts. It is a judgment that resists facts and ignores truth and honesty. Thus, prejudice blinds one to the facts and creates a kind of poison in a relationship. Although prejudice in daily life is ordinarily a matter of dealing with individual people, it also entails unwarranted ideas concerning a group as a whole. Negative religious, ethnic, or racial prejudice (based on grouping by religion, nationality, or race) is an antipathy based on faulty and inflexible generalization or stereotyping. According to Allport, it may be felt or expressed, and it is directed toward a group as a whole or toward an individual because he or she is a member of that group. Religious, ethnic, or racial prejudice persists for several reasons. Prejudice gives an individual a false sense of identity and self-worth; that is, a person may discriminate against others to make himself feel more powerful and to elevate his own self-esteem. Also, categorization and stereotyping often offer a convenient scapegoat for individual or group problems.
Prejudice, then, is generally the way one thinks or feels about a particular person or group. Discrimination is acting on that negative prejudice. Allport further explains that negative prejudice and discrimination are expressed in escalating levels of violence. These escalating levels of discrimination move from spoken abuse to genocide in the following order:
1. Spoken Abuse (which he calls Antilocution)
2. Avoidance
3. Discrimination or Legalized (Institutionalized) Racism
4. Violence Against People and Property
5. Extermination or Genocide (the systematic attempt to destroy an entire people)
Allport contends that minor forms of prejudice such as spoken abuse have a way of growing into more virulent and destructive forms of discrimination and violence. In the following excerpts from The Nature of Prejudice, author Gordon Allport identifies the problem of prejudice, describes the escalating levels of violence associated with prejudice, and defines the meaning of scapegoat in ancient and modern society.

The following excerpts have been taken from:

THE NATURE OF PREJUDICE

By Gordon W. Allport

a member of Perseus Books. L.L.C.

From: "What is the Problem?"

For myself, earth-bound and fettered to the scene of my activities, I confess that I do feel the differences of mankind, national and individual . . . I am, in plainer words, a bundle of prejudices—made up of likings and dislikings—the veriest thrall to sympathies, apathies, and antipathies.

Charles Lamb

In Rhodesia a white truck driver passed a group of idle natives and muttered, "They’re lazy brutes." A few hours later he saw natives heaving two-hundred pound sacks of grain onto a truck, singing in rhythm to their work. "Savages," he grumbled. "What do you expect?"
In one of the West Indies it was customary at one time for natives to hold their noses conspicuously whenever they passed an American on the street. And in England, during the war, it was said, "The only trouble with the Yanks is that they are over-paid, over-sexed, and over here."
Polish people often called the Ukrainians "reptiles" to express their contempt for a group they regarded as ungrateful, revengeful, wily, and treacherous. At the same time Germans called their neighbors to the east "Polish cattle." The Poles retaliated with "Prussian swine"—a jibe at the presumed uncouthness and lack of honor of the Germans.
In South Africa, the English, it is said, are against the Afrikaner; both are against the Jews; all three are opposed to the Indians; while all four conspire against the native black.
In Boston, a dignitary of the Roman Catholic Church was driving along a lonesome road on the outskirts of the city. Seeing a small Negro boy trudging along, the dignitary told his chauffeur to stop and give the boy a lift. Seated together in the back of the limousine, the cleric, to make conversation, asked, "Little Boy, are you a Catholic?" Wide-eyed with alarm, the boy replied, "No sir, it’s bad enough being colored without being one of those things."
Pressed to tell what Chinese people really think of Americans, a Chinese student reluctantly replied, "Well, we think they are the best of the foreign devils." This incident occurred before the Communist revolution in China. Today’s youth in China are trained to think of Americans as the worst of the foreign devils.
In Hungary, the saying is, "An anti-Semite is a person who hates the Jews more than is absolutely necessary."
No corner of the world is free from group scorn. Being fettered to our respective cultures, we, like Charles Lamb, are bundles of prejudice.

From: "Acting Out Prejudice"

What people actually do in relation to groups they dislike is not always directly related to what they think or feel about them. Two employers, for example, may dislike Jews to an equal degree. One may keep his feelings to himself and may hire Jews on the same basis as any workers—perhaps because he wants to gain goodwill for his factory or store in the Jewish community. The other may translate his dislike into his employment policy, and refuse to hire Jews. Both men are prejudiced, but only one of them practices discrimination. As a rule discrimination has more immediate and serious social consequences than has prejudice.
It is true that any negative attitude tends somehow, somewhere, to express itself in action. Few people keep their antipathies entirely to themselves. The more intense the attitude, the more likely it is to result in vigorously hostile action.
We may venture to distinguish certain degrees of negative action from the least energetic to the most.
1. Antilocution. Most people who have prejudices talk about them. With like-minded friends, occasionally with strangers, they may express their antagonism freely. But many people never go beyond this mild degree of antipathetic action.
2. Avoidance. If the prejudice is more intense, it leads the individual to avoid members of the disliked group, even perhaps at the cost of considerable inconvenience. In this case, the bearer of prejudice does not directly inflict harm upon the group he dislikes. He takes the burden of accommodation and withdrawal entirely upon himself.
3. Discrimination. Here the prejudiced person makes detrimental distinctions of an active sort. He undertakes to exclude all members of the group in question from certain types of employment, from residential housing, political rights, educational or recreational opportunities, churches, hospitals, or from some other social privileges. Segregation is an institutionalized form of discrimination, enforced legally or by common custom.
4. Physical attack. Under conditions of heightened emotion prejudice may lead to acts of violence or semi-violence. An unwanted Negro family may be forcibly ejected from a neighborhood, or so severely threatened that it leaves in fear. Gravestones in Jewish cemeteries may be desecrated. The Northside’s Italian gang may lie in wait for the Southside’s Irish gang.
5. Extermination. Lynchings, pogroms, massacres, and the Hitlerian program of genocide mark the ultimate degree of violent expression of prejudice.
This five-point scale is not mathematically constructed, but it serves to call attention to the enormous range of activities that may issue from prejudiced attitudes and beliefs. While many people would never move from antilocution to avoidance; or from avoidance to active discrimination, or higher on the scale, still it is true that activity on one level makes transition to a more intense level easier. It was Hitler’s antilocution that led Germans to avoid their Jewish neighbors and erstwhile friends. This preparation made it easier to enact the Nürmberg laws of discrimination which, in turn, made the subsequent burning of synagogues and street attacks upon Jews seem natural. The final step in the macabre progression was the ovens at Auschwitz.
From the point of view of social consequences much "polite prejudice" is harmless enough—being confined to idle chatter. But unfortunately, the fateful progression is, in this century, growing in frequency. The resulting disruption in the human family is menacing. And as the peoples of the earth grow ever more interdependent, they can tolerate less well the mounting friction.

From: "Meaning of Scapegoat"

The term scapegoat originated in the famous ritual of the Hebrews, described in the Book of Leviticus (16:20-22). On the Day of Atonement a live goat was chosen by lot. The high priest, robed in linen garments, laid both his hands on the goat’s head, and confessed over it the iniquities of the children of Israel. The sins of the people thus symbolically transferred to the beast, it was taken out into the wilderness and let go. The people felt purged, and for the time being, guiltless.
The type of thinking here involved is not uncommon. From earliest times the notion has persisted that guilt and misfortune can be shifted from one man’s back to another. Animistic thinking confuses what is mental with what is physical. If a load of wood can be shifted, why not a load of sorrow or a load of guilt?
Nowadays we are likely to label this mental process projection. In other people we see the fear, anger, lust that reside primarily in ourselves. It is not we ourselves who are responsible for our misfortunes, but other people. In our common speech we recognize this failing in such phrases as "whipping-boy," "taking it out on the dog," or "scapegoat."
http://schoolwires.henry.k12.ga.us/4..._Prejudice.doc

If we can recognize our prejudices, then we can change them. Pretty much everyone has prejudices. Most of us simply are not aware of our own prejudices because we are used to them and have not questioned them much.

Shangrala · Jan 03, 2010, 05:46 PM

Perhaps, you can first begin by asking yourself if YOU have any kind of belief, (not necessarily religious, but of any kind of beliefs which provide you a sense of guidance).
If so, from that, allow that to be your understanding to provisions of a means of acceptance/tolerance of other's choices....Maybe tell yourself, that since you have your own choice of belief, then they, too have the same right to choose theirs?

I believe that since ALL religions and/or beliefs of superior guidance is from ONE source, anyway, (although many dispute that fact...their choice), it only makes sense that we ALL have the equal right to our individual choice of HOW we perceive that one belief.
So, in other words, (that is if you do have your own belief), what you believe is the same as what other's believe. The only difference is in individual choices, that's all. It's all one in the same, despite how we choose to perceive "IT".

Hope this makes sense to you, and that it's helped some.

Shangrala

sunflower55 · Jan 03, 2010, 07:35 PM

Do you feel love anywhere?
Why not start to build upon that emotion.

I've found, in my experience, anyway,
that love drives out hate.

So, when you begin to feel the experience of hate,
substitute the emotion of love from whatever source you know it comes from in your life.
And even if, for now, you can't seem to find that source of love,
just say the words, "I Love," out loud, or scream it aloud inside your head, (if you can't speak aloud for some reason).

I actually did this.
It worked, for me.
The anger began to disapate.
And the feelings of love began to fill my being.
Not overnight, mind you. But, it happened.

Try it just as an exercise.
It can't hurt.
It could help.

So, where did you say you feel love?

Peace!

Jan 03, 2010, 07:41 PM

I have been plagued with anger issues. My therapist at the time asked me to make a list of anger triggers. After the list was prepared, I was asked what it was about these topics that got me going. Then I practiced to be on alert to where conversations may head and to prepare myself for a proper reaction to a possible trigger.

At first this was extremely difficult for me. Sometimes the only way I could avoid another angry rant was to walk away. Now I am better at managing my anger. Even so, at times my anger still takes off like a drag racer before I have a chance to put on the breaks.

Maybe you might consider a similar exercise?

VickiesPath · Jan 04, 2010, 06:27 PM

There is one important question to ask before considering all of the posts above: You are definitely sure you are talking about "religion" as opposed to "faith" or "spirituality" in any form? They are entirely different things.

Jan 04, 2010, 07:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DivideByZero

How do I start being kinder/gentler to people that I have real difficulty dealing with?

A good place to start is by being kind to yourself. This is not my idea, but one I have been taught...and it seems to work!

www.shambhala.org/teachers/pema/tonglen1.php

DivideByZero · 12:06 AM

Mostly it is how good humans can support such hateful beliefs, every single one of these belief systems are at best irrational, and at worst have resulted in horrible acts of cruelty. The good people that I talk to in these belief systems have all gone to great lengths to interpret the literature associated with the belief systems to allow for more compassion, why do we need to do that instead of just tossing the entire thing out and starting from scratch. Starting a new human-friendly/community based belief system from scratch. I loose faith in humanity when we resort to calling on a supernatural force to assist us in whatever problems we are facing. I get tired of people thanking god for the efforts of others. i.e. "Thank god this person gave me food." I think it would better fit to thank the person or the organization. I have been deeply hurt by these beliefs and the people that support them through my life. I have even faced into family choosing an invisible god over their real family members. There is something wrong with this we readily treat other mental illnesses why dont we as a culture begin to treat this grand delusion?

Jan 06, 2010, 12:50 AM

Perhaps the energy you expend denying the viability of current belief systems might be better used to help those less fortunate than you?

Rapunzel · Jan 06, 2010, 01:05 AM

Because everyone has the right to choose to believe as seems best to them. And you have the right not to believe. We all get to choose.

My beliefs make sense to me, and from my perspective it seems irrational to reject it out of hand. Seeing and hearing are not the only ways to know what is true. I have felt that God is real. It's much harder to share an inner feeling than to show something that you could look at and touch, and experience the same way that I do. Yes, I believe that God created this world and sent us here, and provides for us, often through other people as mediators, who respond to His promptings, ask what He wants them to do, or sometimes are not aware that they are serving God at all. But the purpose here is not to convince you to believe as I do - it is to try to explain that I have as much reason to believe as I do, as you do to believe (or not) as you do. Religion has been important to people since the beginning of this world. Anything important to someone enough has the potential to be used in hurtful ways. Why not eliminate money, land, oil, sex, ...? All of these have been associated with horrible acts of cruelty, because they are valued. Or, maybe we could all try harder to accept each other and treat each other as human beings with choices, and differences, and rights, and needs and values that may not always be exactly the same.

One of the kids that I work with recently decided to tell his family, who are very religious and had been encouraging him to follow the religion, that he is agnostic. I was impressed with this family because they listened to their son and allowed him his point of view, asking questions respectfully and not pressuring him or pushing him to change his mind. They exercised their belief in agency, or the right for all people to choose for themselves. It is a principle of this religion that God will never take away a person's agency and we should not either. This family has continued to support each other, listen to each other, and do their best to understand each other.

Christina86 · Jan 06, 2010, 11:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DivideByZero

I have a _huge_ chip on my shoulder against all forms of religion. I know this is a problem.. I can't even have a conversation with a person that is religious without wanting to attack their beliefs. It is horrible.

I don't want to hurt anyone, I need some tips on how to just sit with the feelings of revulsion at the beliefs and recognize the human under the beliefs even if I don't like what they are doing. I want to be nicer/kinder to all people regardless of their beliefs. Anger is just killing me at the moment and I am such a hypocrite because one of the worst parts of religion is the polarized morality and judgement and I just do the same thing that I hate, but under a different banner.

How do I start being kinder/gentler to people that I have real difficulty dealing with?

I think you've taken a huge step in realizing your beliefs, and wanting to change. That's something great, and it shows you are in fact a nice and kind person, even if you hate or judge religious people. (Keeping in mind that we *all* judge others within seconds of meeting them, but most of it is subconscious).

I'm just running out now, but I saw your post and wanted to respond to start off. I've had difficulty with people in the same way, so I'll share some advice when I get back tonight.

A_Long_ways · Jan 06, 2010, 02:26 PM

Just wanted to drop in and let you know you're not alone in this. As the forums have strict rules concerning religion, I cannot go into any details. But, I know how you feel.

05:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DivideByZero

Anger is just killing me at the moment and I am such a hypocrite because one of the worst parts of religion is the polarized morality and judgement and I just do the same thing that I hate, but under a different banner.

Quote:

Originally Posted by DivideByZero

I have been deeply hurt by these beliefs and the people that support them through my life. I have even faced into family choosing an invisible god over their real family members.

since you are finding yourself falling into those same behaviors you despise in religious folks, when you have left religion behind, i think the problem you are dealing with is not really one of religion but more likely of abuse, namely spiritual abuse. abuse takes many forms and sadly some particularly damaging abuse happens in the name of religion. i am so sorry that you have experienced this and i've met plenty of others online who have experienced it as well. i used to hang out on a forum of a new movement within my faith and a number of the people had come from abusive spiritual backgrounds. unfortunately, i only know of resources for this for people who are still within their faith, but i'd encourage you to google something like "spiritual abuse" and "recovery" as there are probably some good resources out there that can help you heal. seeing a therapist for this is also a good option.

DivideByZero · Jan 06, 2010, 11:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bloom3

since you are finding yourself falling into those same behaviors you despise in religious folks, when you have left religion behind, i think the problem you are dealing with is not really one of religion but more likely of abuse, namely spiritual abuse. abuse takes many forms and sadly some particularly damaging abuse happens in the name of religion. i am so sorry that you have experienced this and i've met plenty of others online who have experienced it as well. i used to hang out on a forum of a new movement within my faith and a number of the people had come from abusive spiritual backgrounds. unfortunately, i only know of resources for this for people who are still within their faith, but i'd encourage you to google something like "spiritual abuse" and "recovery" as there are probably some good resources out there that can help you heal. seeing a therapist for this is also a good option.

Thanks this was particularly helpful.

Jan 08, 2010, 12:59 PM

I can understand having an intolerance for people who try to convert you or who demean you because of your own beliefs, but hating people simply because you don't agree with their beliefs seems to go against your own issues with religion. Not all religious individuals are out to demean you or convert you. Can you not just respect the fact that there are many different types of belief systems out there and not pass judgement on people for their beliefs? That is what you would want them to do for you, isn't it? Calling belief systems delusional and mental illnesses is certainly not respectful of differences.

I am a person of faith, but I have respect for the belief systems of others. I may not agree with them, but I certainly wouldn't demean them.

Jan 08, 2010, 04:16 PM

Anger and intolerance are the enemies of correct understanding. ~Mohandas Gandhi

jerrymichele · Jan 08, 2010, 04:33 PM

It really amazes me how religion gets blown up. I had a guy from another site ask me what my religion is. I just told him that I really didn't want to get into the conversation with him, because I might offend him. He sends me back a email telling me what he believes in. Making it a point to scream it out to me. The real weird thing about it. I have never even had a conversation with this man before. Imo I think that people should only talk with people in their oraganzation about what they believe in. I would just say if something like this sets you off then I would tell the person that you wish not to talk about it.

youOme · Jan 08, 2010, 09:16 PM

Divide..

I used to be angry towards religous people... very angry.
My dad was a minister.. a very religous man. I'd say to the point of extremist.. he made religon look like a cult. When I was 12 I moved in with my dad, it was the first time in my life he had taken care of me. It was a HUGE culture shock. He put immense pressure on me to become a devoted Christian. It all blew up when I was 14 and out of control. I realized then I was Athiest... which according to my dad was the worse sin imaginable...blasphemy.

I think the issues I had with my dad and his abuse correlated with Christianity. I was very bitter towards Christians. When I was locked up.. I'd debate religous people, I've even gotten into physical fights over it. I was very disrespectful. The second somebody claimed they were a Christian.. I was on attack mode.

NOW, my attitude is different. I completely respect Christians and their faith. I actually believe faith is a beautiful thing.. it's in human nature. I'm still Athiest... but I've learned to basically suppress my beliefs for myself. Just like with being gay, you'll get people who'll discriminate against you. But it's better to go beyond that. If your discriminating against them, then your only going down on their level. I think respect is important regardless of your beliefs or religon.

Basically, keeping your beliefs to yourself in a private matter... between you and your higher power (or self) is the best thing to do since there's a huge umbrella of beliefs.

lonegael · Jan 09, 2010, 03:29 PM

Perhaps the things that you dislike most in "religious people" are the things that you have a hard time with in yourself or your own personallity. That would explain the feeling that you are being a hypocrit. It might be more of a matter of seeing these things more easily in others than you can in you. It seems to me you aren't really comfortable with the state of things, dear. Very understandable. Huggs, and see where this takes you...

Hunny · Jan 29, 2010, 12:11 AM

Dear Divided,

Why did you come into September's chat tonight and ask your question and then leave before reading my answer or anyone else's answer?

.

bipolo · Jan 29, 2010, 08:03 AM

you say you hate that others believe in a God they can't see or give thanks for powers unseen yet you can't see gravatity or atoms or viruses yet they exsist. You base your belief that there are not forces out there that you can't see yet we are surrounded by unseen forces. I agree you should stop and try to determine what it is specifically that you are angry about. where you learned your angry

Hunny · Jan 30, 2010, 03:11 AM

I just found this site and hope that it can be of some help for you DividedByZero. I'm terribly sorry for what has happened for you and know that this type of abuse can be far more insidious than any other type.

Please know you are loved.

http://www.churchabuse.com/links.asp

There were several other sites but this one struck me as a having some integrity.

.

Shangrala · Jan 30, 2010, 06:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DivideByZero

Mostly it is how good humans can support such hateful beliefs, every single one of these belief systems are at best irrational, I agree. Although, despite that I am in agreement, it is still MY belief vs that of the other's, who in my opinion, have just as much right to believe what they choose to as I do. Therefore who am I to pass judgement upon another's belief simply because it isn't what I believe? I am no better, or worse for my choice in belief. Same applies to anyone else.
and at worst have resulted in horrible acts of cruelty. The good people that I talk to in these belief systems have all gone to great lengths to interpret the literature associated with the belief systems to allow for more compassion, why do we need to do that instead of just tossing the entire thing out and starting from scratch. Starting a new human-friendly/community based belief system from scratch. This concept sounds wonderful and something that I would support, however unrealistic as there are far too many belief systems that have been practiced throughout our history, which of course include all the invested followers who have already made their individual choices in their own beliefs.
I loose faith in humanity when we resort to calling on a supernatural force to assist us in whatever problems we are facing. Perhaps, these "supernatural forces" is exactly what provides those who believe in that force the sense of comfort, direction and hope that they may need in order TO get through the difficult life they have to endure.
I get tired of people thanking god Maybe this is more of a metaphor, (or simply out of habit), than anything with a "specific" application to any "one" belief to a particular "God"? (even though in the US, "God" is the most common "name" used).
for the efforts of others. i.e. "Thank god this person gave me food." I think it would better fit to thank the person or the organization. Again, I agree. It only seems right to thank those who actually do provide the grace of relief, rather than applying it to what one cannot actually "see"....(but, just because it cannot be seen, does that really mean it "isn't"?).
I have been deeply hurt by these beliefs and the people that support them through my life. I have even faced into family choosing an invisible god over their real family members. There is something wrong with this we readily treat other mental illnesses why dont we as a culture begin to treat this grand delusion? Maybe that depends on which culture you're refering to? If you are referring to the U.S. culture, (and my apologies if you are not), then it stands to reason that with our culture comes vast variety or origins. With that comes equally vast belief systems, which is impossible to unite as one entity of belief. But, again, who's to say that one is "better" than another?

DBZ~

I am sorry for how these belief systems have effected you personally. I know what it's like having to deal with family placing a belief before that of a loved one, which hasn't resulted exactly favorably for anyone, really....just more distance and even exilation...and for what? I don't understand it, myself.
As with any REAL love, comes understanding and acceptance. Yet I have learned, too, that there are others who require more TO endure what this life demands from us in order to cope, which is perfectly okay.

I wish you all the best on your search for the root of your anger and can only hope that you, too, find a sense of your own placement....

Shangrala

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