Question

I am friends with my sister's exhusband's wife. She is really nice. Do you think it is back stabbing of me?

I think that it's nice. Friends are important.

I am friends with my first ex boyfriends sister... and we love still talking and have kept in touch for over 8 years after the split. We try not to talk about him or what happened between us.

I think that as long as you aren't discussing 'bad' things then it's all good

Took me a minute to get my mind around the connection...anyhow, you are allowed to be friends with whomever you want, no matter their relationship to someone else. If you were talkng trash about your sister to this other friend, that would not be good...but otherwise...just enjoy being friends with someone 'really nice'!

How is that backstabbing? All's good, Michele.

The "EX" is a title which indicates what is past tense, anyway.
Besides, there shouldn't be any 'title' which should precede friendship...wouldn't you think?

Shangrala

We have talked about the kids. I haven't talked to my sister in 3 years. I guess my sister found out that I'm friends with her ex's wife, and I guess she isn't happy about it. I really don't say to much about my sister.

Michele~

Seems to me that what you do with your own life is your business. Who you choose to befriend is of your own accord and shouldn't have any effect on your sister.
Apparently, your sister may have some serious jealousy issues about you, perhaps?
Your sisters ex husbands wife? I can't help but to wonder..why would your sister even give a rats rear about what her EX does, anyway. let alone his wife?

Sounds to me this may be a sibling rivalry issue with her. Regardless...this is HER problem...let her keep it for herself. Try not to allow her to affect you. You're doing nothing wrong.....

Damn...If I had a dime for every time my family disapproved of my choices & behavior, I coulda bought Kristian's way out of Holland by now....

Shangrala

I see where you're coming from, with this question. You and your sister aren't close and you think if she knows you're friends with her exes wife - she might think you're taking sides and she might think "oh she can't be nice to me, but she can be nice to my exes wife -right?

I really don't see anything wrong with you being friends with her, but I share the mentally of not villainizing the ex. If your sis is the type to be enemies with the ex and wife, then she might be offended. Could you drop her an email, saying something like - "don't take it personal but I just like her as a person and not because she's your exes wife and this has nothing to do with you or your ex". Best of luck Michele.

We have discussed her kids. I knew that she was going to find out. I just wanted to know if everyone here felt like I was doing wrong. Really I don't think that I have. My sister does some mean things to people. As a result of her actions it has really impacted the people who are suppost to be close to her. My kids give me grief, but they always talk to me. Her one son just started talking to her again and the other doesn't want anything to do with her. Her youngest son wanted to live with his dad, and the other did live with his dad, and as a result from all of this my sister has punished her kids for it. This is one of the reason's why I won't have anything to do with her, and I don't like anyone trying to control me. I love my sister, but it is so hard to be around her. There is way to much drama to want to have a relationship with her.

I really wish I could do that Lynn. I really believe that my sister needs to really see how her words and actions really hurt people. I think with her it's going to be one of those things where she will need to hit rock bottom before it really has an impact on her seeing things for what they are. My sister LOVES drama. She's one of those people who can't leave well enough alone.

To thine own self be true.

I guess how I felt would depend on if my sister knows? I wouldn't keep it from her. I'm good friends with my husband's ex-wife's sister, similar? LOL However, I also like my husband ex-wife almost better than he does, try to include her in things more than he does. But his ex-wife and her boyfriend, his ex-wife's mother and sister and sister's boyfriend come every year to our house for Mother's Day (with their three grown sons and wives/girlfriends and grandchildren, etc.).