[natnatasha]

my boyfriend and i have been together for almost 4 years. i can say that we have trusted each other and never kept anything to each other. we've talked about our past relationships, families, religious views and pretty much everything. i do feel insecure about her exes because each one of them is pretty and independent, and fun. i, on the other hand, is average and weak and shy. i know how much we love each other because we are still together. recently, i saw pictures of him fooling around with his exes. we have talked about it but i still cant forget how hurt i am. he told me that the fooling around only happened when he needed me and i wasn't there to comfort him so he turned to his exes. His exes supposedly made the first moves and, as a guy, he couldn't resist. i feel so betrayed because first of all we talk about problems that he share. second, i allow him to go out with friends. third, i am absolutely sure that he is satisfied, sexually. the days the pictures were dated were the days when he "talked" to a friend or "fell asleep". i dont know how to trust him again.

[Belle1979]

Don't put yourself down natnatasha, I am sure that you are a wonderful person who is not average, weak and shy - proving it by posting here to express how hurt you are.

Do you want to continue being with him if he has betrayed your trust like that?

My therapist has said to me many time in the past, trust can't be earnt, it either there or it's not... open you heart and think deep and long - sound to me like you deserve better xx

[allme]

No dont put yourself down!

In my opionion, using the reasons you wasnt there etc is nonsense. Dont blame yourself for this or let him.... it's not your fault at all.

We cant tell you whether or not to trust him again.. you must follow your heart on that... but you must not lay any blame on yourself or worse, let him blame you. Its not your fault.

*hugs*

[AkAngel]

Originally Posted by natnatasha

His exes supposedly made the first moves and, as a guy, he couldn't resist.

If you weren't feeling so bad already I'd tell you that got me mighty offended. It didn't, but I'd probably tell you that.

I'm a guy - don't ever let anyone tell you that they couldn't resist because they are a guy. That's bull. My wife has been in prison for the last 22 years and we get no conjugal visits. What I'm about to say is going to sound arrogant as heck but I want to make a point...

I've dropped a few points on the cuteness scale since my twenties but I have charisma coming out my butt. I'm a professional poker player, author and member of mensa. I've been on both national TV and radio countless times. I've held national sports titles and made the junior olympic team as a teenager. I have $3600 in my wallet right now walking around money. There isn't a night I couldn't go out and get someone - maybe not anyone I wanted, but someone. Opportunity abounds and yet I haven't. I vehemently and violently reject the 'as a guy, he couldn't resist' argument.

As far as putting yourself down and comparing yourself to her... she's sleeping around with someone elses boyfriend. If I know NOTHING else about her and NOTHING else about you - I like you so much more than her already that it's sickening.