How to stop doubting myself...?

First of all....I love your photo....so artistic and girl you are cute
cool that he's friend of your friend now.....no problem with that....It looks like he really likes you and he wants to be closer to you by being friend with your girlfriend.....
I used to be a big fan of Facebook two years ago....then I got all obsess with Aaron after our rocky relationship.....and that was no fun....I really think he used facebook to hurt me....whenever we had argue, the next day he was posting photos of him and other girls on the dance floor....and I was getting so upset....then I stopped myself of login to the FB for awhile, but then it was like addiction, I was getting back on it and catch up, looking at his wall and photos....and then again depression and sadness....then I thought WTF...this is not doing any good to me....and now, I blocked him....actually, it was your suggestion my friend
Now, I'm just using it very little....and I'm happy about it....
I was so happy when Brandon told me he's not on Facebook.....I could see a big smile on my face....hehehe....
We don't have any plan for the next date, but he asked in his email probably a dinner this week.....I'm going to email him back....wish he was calling me sometimes.....got to work on that....hehehe....
but base on my past experience, the relationship that is growing so fast is not good and it gives me so much stress and headache.....I need to slow down and then get used to the person....even I think Sunday was too much from 10am till 7:30pm to spend time together, it's almost 10 hours!!!! however, It was awesome.....
I'll keep you posted....and tell us all about your exciting date....

have fun
Marjan

Marjan is right again....he is befriending the friend to be closer to you. Sounds like he is excited....as he should be. You are a catch and he realizes it (Now if we could just get you to realize it too, that would be great)

Thanks Muser and Marjan

Yes he did befriend her on facebook because he wants to be part of everything in my life and as she is my best friend (we have been through so much together.. the most recent being that I was there with her for the birth of her little boy a few weeks ago).. So it is a good thing.

Well he's BACK... at least for a week He stayed over the first night he was back... nice night, just being able to cuddle was great then yesterday I went and met his parents - nerve racking!!! but they seem nice, normal people LOL I just freak out at the thought of meeting family.

After that went and saw my friend.. and cuddled with the baby.. Louis had to see him.. he'd heard som much about the birth haha
The rest of the day was very lazy, went out for lunch... back to mine to watch a DVD - we both feel asleep - late night the night before out for dinner and went looking at cars... (both want new cars ). Then he went home and I had a good nights sleep...

So after a brilliant day.. why am I still worried that he will turn around one day and tell me that it's just not going to work.... stupid thoughts... he's loving, caring, holds my hand or puts his arm around me in public... fun to be around, financially secure, lots of 'suprise' kisses out of the blue AND we both feel like we have known each other for ever.
I can't expect him to continually re-assure me that he likes me - his actions do say it all - I just need to get it into my head that it is REAL

Trust your instincts. Oh, darn...I said that four letter word again T R U S T (OK...that's five but you know what I mean() Sometimes there really are happy endings.

If we are a little wary it comes from those tough lessons we had to learn.

I had a breakthrough moment today....one step at a time.

Thanks Muser I have to go with my emotions (the good ones!) rather than my instincts.. they are telling me to run so I don't get hurt LOL The heart isn't meant to rule the head hehe but in this case I think it has to try to do just that for a little while...

Yes Trust is a four letter word

What was your breakthrough moment?

((((Belle))))

You've been sent someone very special, someone who was made for you, and whom you were made for.

Just think if that turdburger hadn't left you wouldn't be feeling this love now. I know you don't want to use that L word yet but this is me...

You are going to be worried for a while because of what happened to you, that is normal; I just hope you can see the happiness in your words as you write about what you do and where you go. This guy has helped you to feel again he has literally helped you to feel something you never thought you would again...and I am so happy for you...and very happy for him because I can intuitively feel what a wonderful woman he has found for himself...

(((( (((( (((( ((((hugs)))) )))) )))) ))))

Rhiannon

Thank you so much! Your words brought tears to my eyes - tears of happiness that is. I do hope that you are correct in what you are thinking. I'll try to stay on the positive side of my thoughts. I think you are right, it may take some time for me to not worry but one day I should be 110 % secure in my thoughts and feelings.

((((rhiannon))))

no worries Belle....one day you will....just be patient my friend

I guess what I meant to say was...to remember that you have good judgment and to rely on that and not let fear spoil your day. We've talked about some fine qualities you have and I just want you believe in yourself. Someone made you feel "less than" and I just want to remind you how awesome you really are.

I don't blame you for being cautious....I would never throw caution to the wind. I would just like to see that foundation (your self esteem) strong enough to be that confident, self assured gal I think you are.

There will always be bumps in the road....so we need good shock absorbers to keep us balanced. That's where that patience comes in

Thanks everyone! I am feeling really good today

Louis stayed over last night, even though it meant he had to get up at 6am when I left for work LOL now that is dedication! It was a lazy nice night, dvds, cuddles and just talking... He's a nice guy and I think that I can trust him... it will just take a little while to accept that hahaha

soooooooooo happy for you............

Thanks Marjan

Everything seems to be going REALLY well.. now if i can just accept that everything would be PERFECT LOL

Had a good weekend with Louis. he went out Saturday night with the boys.. and I didn't hear from him the next day until late in the afternoon. All that went through my mind was that he didn't want to be with me anymore.. he was SLEEPING... so the paniced thoughts are just getting over the top. He came over after he woke up, was really guilty about sleeping the day away and sucking up etc.
I jokingly said that I thought he must have met someone else while he was out.. and he hugged me, told me to stop having those thoughts as he had what he wanted right here, and he wasn't going anywhere..
I need to stop (at the very least) expressing the thoughts.. surely it will turn him off eventually that i am so insecure and jealous... I NEVER used to be this way.. it's horrible!!

Everything is going great.. there is romance, spark, great companionship, he's sociable (Mark wasn't), the feelings are there but it's not LOVE... well not how I have defined love in the past....
It's very relaxed, feels like we have been together for many years not just a few months. He's a wonderful person, kind, caring, sweet. We want the same things out of life.
I know that in the past what I have had for guys has bordered on 'infactuation' at the start.. and now this feels more mature, sensible and NICE.

Does the 'love' feelings change as you get older? Do you look for different things?

Heck no!!! It might be different or more at ease but when you've been together a long time but the feelings I have for my guy are very intense and we've been together a long time....and I'm old...LOL

I think we all go through stages....waves....up and downs. It's not easy to put into words. When you're young you are building for the future and when you get older you are maintaining what you have. Hopefully the love will stay. People get scared when they feel a temporary flat spell but you get comfortable. (safe)

There is nothing better than waking up next to your best friend knowing you are right where you are supposed to be.

Thanks

this time around just feels different... more secure I guess, less infactuation and more stable. Think I am used to 'bad' boys LOL ones that have issues that i want to help with... Louis is just NORMAL/SANE/HAPPY and wants to make ME happy and do everything I want for a change... The little things that I do for him (such as buying the drinks he likes or putting lavender oil on his pillow - he loves that) aren't taken for granted.. they are really appreciated.. I am not used to that.
This feels more 50/50 - previously it has always been me giving 110% and the other (Mark for instance) giving only as much as I would let him... a very small amount as I wanted his life to be perfect, stress free and happy and wasn't worried about me and how I was buring the candle at both ends making everyone else around me happy...