[Beautiful_Pain]

<font color="purple"> How do you make friends?

I don't have any...and don't know where to start??

I would love to have someone I could talk to about Anything...either in person or on the phone at the least. *feels strange and dumb*

Hopefully this thread is ok in this topic, too, btw </font>

[CMFox]

Hi.

I'd like to answer but first I'd be interested to know what you do. Do you work? At school? Secondly, how often are you interacting with people -- be it in a professional or casual environment?

You don't have to answer but I was just curious... it'd help me take the right angle with any advice I end up dispensing.

Take care.

[eskielover]

I guess the first step I would take would be to figure out my interests. The best place to find friends are others that share a similar interest, & enjoyments. I have many different interests & different people that are friends in each area.

When I was showing my dogs, I socialized with others that showed. When I was playing my flute professionally, I socialized with other musicians. When I was working as an engineer, I got involved in the management club & socialized with those people. I enjoyed ballroom dancing & joined the club at work....then I started taking private lessons I socialized with other who enjoyed dancing. I loved playing racquettball....I set up lunchtime games with the people I worked with & then competed in tournaments along with joining a racquettball club where I met many people to enjoy sports with.....now I am training in dressage horse riding.....there are clubs all over that meet monthly & then we have show days & social events also. I found that the best basis for friends are my interests......& initially the people are just acquaintences.....but those are the people who grow into friendships as you get to know each other.

Your question is not dumb at all.....it is a question that is asked all the time....you are not unusual. Just remember that common interests provide common subjects to talk about & finding groups with common interests will provide you with the people to draw from. It does take some digging to find groups but is the first step in locating people who may be possible friends.

I hope this has made a little sense,
Debbie

[kimmydawn]

Hi, Beautiful welcome to the forums!

can you check into some groups or classes in your area? you know, fun stuff that interests you?

also, are you "out there" opening yourself up for friendship, or is that difficult for you to do?

i wish you well and look forward to getting to know you better.

be safe,

[JustBen]

Yep, I'll join the chorus on the "interests" thing. When you can get together with a bunch of people that are interested in the same thing you are, not only do you get a bunch of people to talk to, but you have a built-in conversation topic -- a big help, I think.

[wi_fighter]

I got into a conversation one day with a lady at Barnes and Noble. We started pointing out books to each other and really had a nice conversation. It only lasted about 10 minutes, but it was a start. She mentioned that one of the local glass bead studios holds classes for all levels.

I'm really shy in person and always expect someone else to start a conversation, but that's pretty self sabotaging when you think about it. Other people are probably expecting the same thing of me. LOL

I've found when I'm doing things with my kids it helps break down some barriers. When I'm with the kids, it gives me free reign to lighten up and act silly and have a darn good reason for it. That usually makes people more receptive to you when they see you having fun, unless they're a bunch of stuffed shirts and I probably wouldn't want to be their friend in that case anyway.

Good luck with your friend search.

[Beautiful_Pain]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I'd like to answer but first I'd be interested to know what you do. Do you work? At school? Secondly, how often are you interacting with people -- be it in a professional or casual environment?

You don't have to answer but I was just curious... it'd help me take the right angle with any advice I end up dispensing.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">
<font color="purple">

I'm a housewife...no kids (can't have any), no pets. Just dishes and laundry for me. I spend at lot of time at a few sites online. How often do I interact with people?...besides my husband, once a week, If I'm lucky. And those would be my husband's friends from work. But sometimes its longer...2-3 weeks and I'm alone all the time (husband works nights--while I'm sleeping, I'm awake while he's sleeping). I get to see him for an hour or two at most each day. Besides that, I'm alone in the house. </font>

[Beautiful_Pain]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
I guess the first step I would take would be to figure out my interests. The best place to find friends are others that share a similar interest, & enjoyments. I have many different interests & different people that are friends in each area.

When I was showing my dogs, I socialized with others that showed. When I was playing my flute professionally, I socialized with other musicians. When I was working as an engineer, I got involved in the management club & socialized with those people. I enjoyed ballroom dancing & joined the club at work....then I started taking private lessons I socialized with other who enjoyed dancing. I loved playing racquettball....I set up lunchtime games with the people I worked with & then competed in tournaments along with joining a racquettball club where I met many people to enjoy sports with.....now I am training in dressage horse riding.....there are clubs all over that meet monthly & then we have show days & social events also. I found that the best basis for friends are my interests......& initially the people are just acquaintences.....but those are the people who grow into friendships as you get to know each other.

Your question is not dumb at all.....it is a question that is asked all the time....you are not unusual. Just remember that common interests provide common subjects to talk about & finding groups with common interests will provide you with the people to draw from. It does take some digging to find groups but is the first step in locating people who may be possible friends.

I hope this has made a little sense,
Debbie

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

<font color="purple">
Thanks Debbie for taking the time to reply, I don't have interests that are inducive of friends though. =/ I play online games, like to build web sites, read etc. </font>

[Beautiful_Pain]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>

Hi, Beautiful welcome to the forums!

can you check into some groups or classes in your area? you know, fun stuff that interests you?

also, are you "out there" opening yourself up for friendship, or is that difficult for you to do?

i wish you well and look forward to getting to know you better.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

<font color="purple">
Thanks Kimmy, I'm glad to be back here, took quite a hiatus. Thank you for replying =)

The town I live in is very small. As far as I know there are 2 classes (free to public type) One is 1/2 hour away (which pretty much rules it out) It's a Native language class. The other is a little over 10 mins away (but I have no car available) and is a beading class. 1) I can't bead anymore...my hands are bad and I can barely type or pick things up most days. 2) Its a beginner's class and I've been beading for quite awhile (until recently, obviously).

'Out there'? XD (sorry laughing at me not your words.) I don't go out anywhere, it wouldn't matter if I was the friendliest person...I see and meet no one. Not that I am the friendliest person--One of the most shy, more like. I even had trouble sending the new topic post XD
</font>

[Beautiful_Pain]

<font color="purple">

Thank you JustBen and wi_fighter for replying. =)

</font>

[Beautiful_Pain]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Most likey the Dumbest Question ever, but...

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

<font color=" purple">

OMGosh

I can't even spell

</font>

LOL Beautiful.
You'll find someone soon. Don't worry.
(((((((Beautiful Pain))))))))

[Beautiful_Pain]

<font color="purple">
Thank you Jax =D
{{{{{{Jax}}}}}

I hope so
</font>

[Estee1]

Beautiful pain, you're qoute is so good. i love it. pain is bad but how would we know good if we never had pain. Don't know if i'm making any sense.

[misty]

deffinately not dumb question. Have to know how to be a friend first I'm learning.
larks

[Beautiful_Pain]

<font color="purple">
Thanks {{{Estee}}} =)

Thanks for replying larks, I'm not sure what that means, though =/
</font>

[(JD)]

I think larks was thinking what I was too... first, be friendly! Try and not be shy... open up some... greet ppl on elevators, meet your postal clerk... (not that you aren't, just ideas of where to begin??) TC

[Beautiful_Pain]

<font color="purple">

Thanks for replying, Sky. =)

I don't think my point is coming across well, or something. I see NO ONE, I'm always in my house, no transportation, and can barely walk around in my house--let alone 'walking somewhere'. The only people I talk to are the people here at PC and my husband.

Does that help anyone to understand my situation better?
</font>

[bonaire]

That's a tough situation to be in. I feel for you and hope you can find peace in the situation you are in.

My wife has a similar friend in Michigan who is home-bound (wheelchair, polio victim). Her husband goes to work and sometimes out of town. She's truly stuck in the apartment.

The good thing is now with PCs and internet, our ability to share with people and meet fellow souls actually is far bigger and wider than we ever had "before". Imagine without the PC or the internet in the 1980s or before (back in the stone-age, huh?) Find beauty in what you have - it's there.