FWB?

So, I have a friend who is a girl. I like her very much, yet I am in one of these situations, and I don't know what to do. I have been out of a relationship of any kind for 2 years... I don't know how I should be, or if this will even last as a friendship now. Please advise, if you were me, and not capable of having a serious relationship right now. Is fwb a good option?

But,what is fwb then?

Are you talking about 'friends with benefits'?

***Ahhh....Lynn...you well-rounded woman....lol....Ugh I am silly...I'm like all giggly naow.

***I say,if you desire to propose the suggestion of being FWb,what can it hurt?Be very clear on your boundaries.These tend tho',to become sticky,sticky situations.But ,if you are upfront....you have that to refer back to?.....Personally I feel too much to not fall in love.If I share me...my heart comes with it.LOL.....But yeh...be upfront.~W~

Depends on what your or her values are about that. There are still some people in this society that do not believe in sex outside of marriage let alone FWB.....or as least they want to know that the relationship is going to be a long term one before giving themselves to it physically. Think it would be wise to know her values before springing that on her. Know I wouldn't like someone springing that offer on me

Isn't there like an Aston Kutcher movie about this? I heard they never end like you plan.

Thanks all. Yeah, I'm just scared about going into a new relationship of any kind.

Anyone out there who has done the friends with benefits thing? Movies say it ends badly, but what about in reality?

I don't believe in FWB. All it is, is sex on demand with no strings attached, and when one of the "friends" inevitably falls in love with the other and the feelings are not returned, somebody is going to be seriously hurt.

I know, because I was usually the one to fall in love and get hurt. Major ouch.

And then after that happens, you can't even be friends anymore, because it is too painful for both.

I actually had a friends with benefits situation for about 2 years before i met my husband. We were both very clear about our intentions - we were friendly - hung out, fooled around, and he went home. we contacted each other when we wanted to.....have benefits....and that was it. We saw each other when we both weren't dating someone....it suited us both fine. When I got engaged he was so happy for me and it was over just like that. I run in to him from time to time and it's not even awkward. Maybe we are an unusual situation, but we just had it worked out.

I can only hope things go this way. I'm really sure we're both on the same page there. She and I are cool with the arrangement so far. I'm optimistic. Things are looking good.

So basically you want sex? You're liable to end up having children with someone who will end up not your friend.

Foul. Don't presume to know more about a situation than you actually do. This will help in avoiding making bad remarks that make no sense. Instead, I recommend a more open minded view of asking questions and receiving answers. Better decisions and opinions are formed on the framework of understanding.

It is my hope that these words change a behavior, not exaggerate it.

OUCH

Well said.

I have never done a friends with benefits but I can imagine that if you are both on the same page, it can be a good way to ease back into relationships. BUT the only thing is, I don't trust that people can keep feelings out of the bedroom SO easily. But if you know what you want, you are both adults so I say go for it.

My only concern is that they might start out on the same page, but then someone finds their feelings deepening and gets hurt. I'm just tossing that possibility out there for consideration. The decision is of course up to the OP and the FW potential B.

I understand FWB is "friends with benefits" which is a euphemism for a casual sex relationship. Again, I say that to have sex with someone can result in children. That isn't "foul;" I'm not "foul" and what I said isn't "foul" -- I called it like it is: sex can result in children. Of course you might be 70 years old and your sex partner 90. Then I agree the likelihood of children resulting from any friends with sex benefits is slim. But given the many youth who visit this website, they need to know -- whether you do or not -- that heterosexual sex with someone can result in parenthood.

/sigh

I was hoping we'd not go the way of misunderstanding, but alas, here we are. Instead of making things worse for you, I'll simply apologize for any offense I have caused. I wonder if you really grasp the whole conversation, but I'm not really interested in educating you. I assume you can read, or, in absence of being able to do that, ask appropriate questions to address any misconceptions.

Fundamentally, I agree with your point. But I'm also not retarded, and do what I need to do to assure that sex is fun, and not a creative act. It's not something I take lightly. You don't know me, my situation, or anything resembling context. Don't assume that you do, not for my sake (because I know I'm right about my own life), but for yours. Please don't make yourself look rude or foolish at my expense. I offer you my friendship as someone who probably has a few things in common with you. I hope you take it, as I am a very good friend.

Thanks, respectfully,

Eric

I am interjecting only to say,I believe what he meant by 'foul' was actually just to say 'out of bounds' like a sports call.Not that you are foul.I believe he was inferring that you had made an assumption without really knowing what he meant.I apologize if I am out-of-line to interject.But I thought it important to point out that you were likely not being called...'foul'.Hope this helps.~W~

You asked. Some answered.

True. And also not in dispute. I value every response I have received so far. This issue is really important to me because of my life situation right now. Thank you, community, for your eclectic and informative responses. I am in your debt.

Larfu,they're under a spell.Your feelings are hurt too.This thread is sad.

No one likes Larfu. Even in the divorce forums... no one likes Larfu.

Good thing I have a ton of self confidence at the moment.

AH HA! IMPERVIOUS!

p.s. I love Sting

Don't be silly haha....Wolf likes you.Violet is correct.It is a spell.Sting rocks btw

Thank you for calling me eclectic It made me happy.

My thought is be very careful and clear about setting up boundaries and expectations and be prepared if things don't turn out the way you plan. What happens between consenting adults is really no ones business. Sometimes though, we forget that sex is more than a physical act...emotions and vulnerability come into play here.
That's my 2 cents anyways...

And to the underage on this forum - if that is something you are also considering, please protect yourself - both physically and emotionally