She's getting on my nerves

If you allow me to vent a little...
I just broke up with my boyfriend of an year and 3 months.So lets say I'm not completly ok, right? I'm a bit down and disappointed with life and feeling a bit on the depressed side of life...
But I have this friend, who doesn't seem to care at all for my feelings.
Let me explain.
She and her ex broke up last July and I was there for her until I couldn't hear her talking about it no more (like two months after it happened I started to give her a bit of tough love instead of the "it'll be alright, and you did nothing wrong"). Although I was super happy at that time with my recent ex, I never mentioned it to her out of respect...
I broke up last thursday.. when I phoned her to talk, to tell her she listened for 4 minutes before changing the conversation to our up coming exam..
It bugged me a lot because I needed to speak with someone and my other friends couldn't pick the phone because there're in class.
But I let it pass.
Every time I needed to vent this past couple of days she changes the topic and ignores me.
Today she even bragged about how good it was to ride the train with her boyfriend (a new one she's been dating for the last 7months) and how they were all over each other like one of those couples she hated to see on the train when she is riding it alone.
C'mon!!
I JUST broke up with MY boyfriend!! I was there for her when her ex broke her heart... I listened for hours, I held her hand, I wiped her tears... I'm not saying I want a prize for it, for I did it because I love her dearly. I just wish she could see how annoying and hurtful she's being rubbing her happiness in my face...
It's not only that. It's happening with her grades as well. She's becoming too competitive and alienating everyone in our group. I'm the only one that still talks to her normally and still defends her.
I'm getting tired of her attitude and I wish she could see it.

Am I wrong to expect some respect for my grieve? ok, I was the one to broke it but it still hurt, and it hurts more than breaking up with some one she only knew for some months like she did but I still heard her complain, I spoke to her on the phone for hours and hours... I never told her a single good thing about my relationship with my ex in that period because I didn't want to hurt her by rubbing my "sucess" in her face...

Maybe I'm being unfair.. but she getting on my nerves ever since the beginning of the school year and this was the last drop...

Should I tell her or let it pass?

That's tough one. But I'll tell you what I told my little sister about expecting things from people:

Don't.

Don't expect to be treated the same way you treat others. Because you'll be disappointed and resentful. Yeah, it'd be nice if people were there for you the way you are for them. But you do this to be selfless and caring. Not because you expect anything in return.

Because most of the time, they won't do it. They don't see things the way you and I do.

Yeah, you should talk to her. Be honest. Tell her you need a friend to talk to about this because it will help you move on. Don't be angry or upset, or even expect anything to change about her "bragging" and being competitive. I hope she'll empathize with you and be there for you. But don't expect her to do this. Just let it happen.

I'm not saying you should be a pessimist - just be real. Most people do things that disappoint because we expect them to be something they aren't. Talk to her about it and see what happens. At this point, it's the best both of you can do.

In the meantime, I'm really sorry about your breakup. It's tough (I'm divorced). It's hard to move on sometimes, and even harder when you feel lonely and sad. I hope you are OK, and remember to take care of yourself.

I totally agree with Looking For Calm (great name), I expect others to treat me as I treat them but it doesnt always happen.
At least you know you were there for her, you were a friend. Just always remember the way you felt when you needed some TLC and didnt get it from her, as I have a feeling, she will need you before you need her.
Take care = Keep smiling!

Thank you LookingForCalm and FlowerOfScotland =)
I indeed didn't do it and don't do anything expecting a reward from her or anyone but it sometimes can be hurtful to see people ignoring me when I'm always there for them when they need it.
She's getting very pricky I'm afraid and no one in our group can stand her but me. I'm like the one in the middle of the "war".
I guess I never expected her to be so cold to me when I'm hurting.
It's not that I'm not happy for her and D to finally hitting it off okey (as they had dated as friends for a while before she had that short relationship with her ex, and now they're actually in a relationship for over 6months and are very happy. As I was one of the people to support her decision to date him after all the wrong he did to her I'm happy to see it work) but I guess I needed my friend and she's not being one at the moment.

I guess I really have to tell her.
thank you for your advice and I'll keep myself sane and healthy =) even if I intend to lose some weight now that my sadness is making me less hungry but I'm keeping myself occupied and eating healthy as it's a good way to keep me away from the anti-d pills =) and on the plus side I've been struggling with my weight for some time and losing some (already lost 2,5 kg since I started worring about my relationship and then after breaking up, more or less in 2 1/2 weeks) is making me less unhappy so I'm coping okey. I just miss him a lot... he was my best friend this past year and not talking to him everyday is so weird, so hard...
Thank you for your support and advice, I really need to vent and put it out there

I also agree with LookingForCalm. You should tell her how you feel in a polite manner. You can always vent to us here. Break-ups are hard. Even harder when it seems like no one seems to care or want to be there for you. We are here for you anyway we can be. Hang in there Do somethings to take care of you.

eheh, you made me laugh PleaseHelp =) because I was thinking just that! Venting here so I wouldn't vent in front of her =/
My other friends are being very understanding and supportive. They know I rather be in my corner and talk when I need so they don't talk or ask about it unless I say something but this particular friend doesn't talk or ask or let me talk or say something without changing the subject or bragging about her boyfriend and her relationship.
I can't see to catch a break with this one... after I defended her reputation among our group of friends because of the atitude she's been having...I'm starting to be low on arguments in her defense when she's so cold to me lately.
I couldn't even tell her when I was starting to have doubts about my ex because I knew if I ended up making them go away and not breaking up with him she would never let me live that moment out...
I guess she did so much lately and I took it and kept my mouth shut that it's catching up to me.
I'm going to talk to her as soon as she does something like she did today (the train thing ).

I appreciate so much the support and feedback I'm getting here in PC =) I'm so happy I found this place when I need it the most =)
Thank you!!

(((((Hugggsss)))))

Haven't talked to her yet...
I'm feeling a bit blue today so I didn't want to add up more complications to the menu...
Today I just broke down. Haven't really cried over M. Just a bit here and there... I cried after breaking up but had to suck it up because I had a test the next day. So I guess I've been building up my emotions and today I broke down a little out of no where hearing to "Big girls don't cry"by fergie... the irony
And then watching grey's anatomy and then when my mom was joking about how maybe now she could present me to the niece of a dear friend of ours that died last year. I felt offended by this last thing.... mom has been very "happy" over my break up... says she's been right all along when she warned me he didn't treat me good enough for me to have a long relationship with him (although she says she isn't happy -.- she says she likes him like a son, as she has known him almost as long as she has my older brother but he was not what she knows I need in a guy... go figure...!! lol she's even worse than me when looking for stuff in guys... thinks I deserve the best of the best. newsflash mom! There's no such perfect guy!!) anywhoo... I'm been a bit of a daisy today so I didn't talked to C today but I must do so. Maybe tomorrow :/

Thank you Wolfsong

Hang in their hon. You are going through a lot. You do need to give yourself sometime to grieve. Grieve the loss of the relationship and possibly the friendship. As for C, you'll know when the time is right to talk to her about things.

Big hugs from me. PM if you'd like.