Just can't take it anymore

I hate my boyfriend... I really do. It's been back and forth with him for almost 10 years now.. Such a waste of my life! We have a beautiful 7 yr old son together, but we still live in seperate homes (in which our son has to go back and forth between), and live seperate lives... he makes little or no time for me. Why am I still here? He tells me that being Bipolar 1 and dealing with Borderline are "just in my head"... Well DUH! They're MENTAL ILLNESSES!!! He's not supportive in any way.. I know I need to end it but then he becomes this hateful man who uses our son to get back at me. That's why I've always gone back... I feel so lost... Thanks for lettin me get this out.

It is very hard to stay away from abusive people. Contrary to popular belief, one would think it was easy. But abusive people can get a grip on you.

He likes to control you. Lots of men are like that. They are on a power trip. He uses your son to control you. If Bi-polar was just in my head, it is, but if it was imaginary, I could get hypnotized and cured.

he's ignorant to the fact that you are not well , he is controlling and he sounds like an idiot , breaking free would make u feel better in the long run trust me x

I told him the other night I was going to start seeing other ppl.. He looked hurt but kinda ignored me.. I explained a little more as to what the problems are (for the 100th time) and he told me I "Nitpick" too much. I told him that's me and he has no choice but to deal with it. Keeping my fingers crossed this time is it!

Hello, tattoogirl33. My suggestion for you is to see an attorney to find out what you might do to protect yourself in the event the father decides to take off with your child.

You have been with him on and off for ten years. Does your state recognize common law marriages? Has the father acknowledged paternity? Have custody and visitation rights been spelled out? How about child support? Who has been claiming the child as a deduction for tax purposes? Especially if you are serious about ending the relationship it is paramount to have these issues sorted now.

You might want to call you state's bar association to see if you can get a free consultation with a domestic relations attorney. You may also want to find out if you are entitled to representation by a pro bono or reduced rate attorney. Look in the yellow pages under Attorneys for the state bar association number.

It is not my intention to alarm you. Nonetheless, you definitely will benefit from being knowledgeable and prepared.

What I am not understanding is - you live in separate homes....he isn't supportive....and you just said you hate him.....why is he your boyfriend? You only need to be civil with him due to your son. Go out and find yourself a guy that respects you.

THANK YOU for your concern!! Lucky for me I'm a paralegal and due to him not being at my son's birth and denying him until he was almost 2 yrs old everything has been taken care of. We do have a Court Order that spells it all out since I knew not to trust him back then. And he pays a good bit of Child Support so I figure that's really the only reason he wanted to be with me in the first place.

Part of me blames him for my Disorders and part of me blames my Disorders for putting up with him... Either way it is over now.. I made it very clear to him I'm done with his BS and my family and friends are backing me 100%!

On to better days Again thank you

It's never been that easy for me.. He would never "allow" me to break it off with him and would make my life HE** (and my son's) when I would. He's in for a big surprise if he starts his crap this time..

Thanks for your response though.. you are soooooo right!!

BTW I just finally (this past Feburary) got my true dx and although I've been on the max dose of Cymbalta for the last 7 yrs I just recently started Serequel XR.. I'm gonna be just fine!! (yes I'm a little hypomanic at the moment.. LOL)

I know it's hard to let go, but you really need to. In the end it'll be better for both you and your son. I hope you get out of this situation.