[faith224]

Today my man and I had a discussion because his good friend called him up today and told him that when we were all at this night club I was letting guys feel up on me. That is not true. We were at the place where my man works and all his boys work there and are always there. If I was to do that I would not even dare do it there, but I wouldn't do it anywhere because I really love the guy I am with and I am happy with him. His good friend told him that he heard I was a freak and that people are saying that they have messed with me and all types of things. My boyfriend knows that I wouldn't carry things like that when I was out that one night and he knows people are going to always talk and have something to say. I have been gang raped and raped in the past and my past is catching up to me once again. I explained to him why people are saying what they are saying. He is mad at himself for believing his friend when he knows deep down inside that I wouldn't do anyhting like that to hurt him. Now he is like he was never his friend if his friend is hating on him. He told me that from now on out we will not hang around any of his friends and I can not hang out anymore. If I am going to go out it can only be with him. I can't even hang out with my best friend. He said that he will be with me 24 - 7 and that is that. He said that if we are out with his friends I cannot talk to them unless they ask me a question first. He even grabbed me really hard when I wouldn't look at him and he scared me. I don't know where our relationship is heading. I mean he wasn't acting like this before. Now he laid down these rules and it makes me feel like he doesn't trust me anymore. I can't be with someone who doesn't trust me and I have not given him a reason to not trust me. He is very understanding and he is a good man, but now I feel like things aren't going the way I think a relationship is supposed to go. Does anyone have any advice on what I should do. I am just not sure of what I am in now. I don't know how to feel. Right now I am not feeling too good. Do you think things are going to get worse. Is he going to turn into some crazy abusive stalker or something. I don't know what to do or how to take it. I know that he loves me and he cares about me and he shows it everyday. Please I need some advice and any advice is well appreciated. Thanks and I hope to hear from someone soon. From men and women I need all the advice I can get. Thanks again.

[DocJohn]

I would talk to him about how you feel about these new one-sided rules, and tell him the truth -- that they are causing you to think seriously about the future of your relationship. Sometimes, the simple, direct approach is the best.

Rules in a relationship are okay and even necessary, but they are rules that both parties must help create and agree upon ahead of time. Rules created by one person won't work for very long, especially at the other person's expense.

DocJohn

[faith224]

Thanks for responding to my post. Yes, I will talk to him about how I feel. I need to know that he does trust in me, but he already told me that he wouldn't be with anyone who he didn't trust. I understand that he doesn't want me to go out much that is understandable and I don't mind cutting down, but he doesn't even want me to go anywhere with or without my bestfriend. He expects me to stay in the house while he is at work and he is like the truck better not leave my house. It better stay there the whole entire time and I put gas in it so don't let your brother take the truck either. He is being a little demanding latly and it is bothering me.