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#1
Dec 14, 2011, 11:11 PM
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Hrmm I do need some input for this particular bothersome situation but I feel a bit of history will help to make it clear why this is a problem for me.
December last year, my ex-girlfriend and I of three years broke up - it was a particularly messy break up with 3rd, even 4th parties involved, and it was a nightmare. Especially considering I had undiagnosed BPD & bipolar. I went insane, it's safe to say after we broke up - I was a danger to myself and everyone around me, not to mention completely unmedicated. I had my first manic episode in January, and it lasted a month. I didn't know at the time it was mania, nor that I would even qualify for a diagnoses of bipolar. My diagnoses of bipolar and BPD are only in their infancy, being assessed only 2 months ago by a psychiatrist. My psychologist recommends I don't have a relationship for at least a year while I heal. Onto the next part. There is someone at my work that I'm interested in; we're a part of a small office, only housing maybe 17 people at a time, but we're like a big family nonetheless. Anyway, my object of interest is a male, and usually I prefer females, so when a guy comes along that I'm interested in, it always piques my interest as to why. But my last relationship was born and bred in my last workplace, which was ultimately a complete disaster. Also, what my psychologist said never leaves my mind; I'm okay being single, but I get unbelievably lonely; however, once I start having feelings for someone, the obsessive side of my BPD rears its ugly head and sinks its claws in. I'm in some sort of limbo right now, so I don't really want to mess around with it, but I also don't want to be alone for so long.. This post probably makes absolutely no sense but I would like some opinions of what you would do in this situation. (Please feel free to ask questions for clarification if you're so inclined.) Thanks to anyone who read this whole thing. 
__________________
“For a long time I believed the opposite of passion was death. I was wrong. Passion and death are implicit, one in the other. Past the border of a fiery life lies the netherworld. I can trace this road, which took me through places so hot the very air burned the lungs. I did not turn back. I pressed on, and eventually passed over the border, beyond which lies a place that is wordless and cold, so cold that it, like mercury, burns a freezing blue flame.” ― Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia Last edited by birdnesthair; Dec 14, 2011 at 11:12 PM. Reason: Grammar |
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#2
Dec 15, 2011, 05:04 AM
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I think I'd have to agree with your psychologist about waiting for a year or so. You ARE early in your diagnosis, and don't really know how your condition "works" --- what are triggers; when do you get manic & why; etc. Once you become more "comfortable" with your condition, and understand it better, then maybe it will be time for another relationship. Also, you might still be smarting from the last one.
 Just take things slow & concentrate on YOU for a change. God bless & take care. Hugs, Lee |
 birdnesthair
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#3
Dec 15, 2011, 07:28 AM
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Thank you for your input. I'm inclined to agree that I do need time for myself. I guess the feeling of loneliness is overwhelming at the best of times. Thanks again.
__________________
“For a long time I believed the opposite of passion was death. I was wrong. Passion and death are implicit, one in the other. Past the border of a fiery life lies the netherworld. I can trace this road, which took me through places so hot the very air burned the lungs. I did not turn back. I pressed on, and eventually passed over the border, beyond which lies a place that is wordless and cold, so cold that it, like mercury, burns a freezing blue flame.” ― Marya Hornbacher, Wasted: A Memoir of Anorexia and Bulimia |
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#4
Dec 15, 2011, 11:08 AM
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I would leave one-on-one relationships alone for the time being and try to make some good friends I could hang with so I wasn't so lonely all the time and could practice social interactions and sharing myself with, and learning about, others.
__________________
"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius |
| birdnesthair
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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