Going nuts

My roommate came to me awhile ago and asked me to help her with her eating habits. Picking the right foods to eat etc.
She weighs almost 300lbs so I said I would help. She is 65 yrs. old and needs to lose it. Anyway, Everytime she picks something eat that she really doesn't need, I say to her, thats not really good to have. Then she starts, well why not, I want it so and so on. This happens everytime! I backed off from helping her because I was tired of listening to her whine. But then all she does is complain that I won't help her and that she needs to lose the weight.
I can't win for losing. You guys have any ideas how to handle her? Thanks JB

doesn't sound to me as if she really wants to lose weight for herself. she "asked" you

doesn't sound to me as if she really wants to lose weight for herself. she "asked" you to help and when you do, she refuses your help. tell her straight up that you're happy to help, if she will use your help...however, if she is only going to go ahead and eat things that aren't good for her...you're sorry, but you don't have time, etc. etc. etc. whatever you want to say. you cannot "help" another person lose weight who only wants to play games with you. good luck, pat

YES.... she wants to loose the weight, but she is probably holding on to it for some emotional safety - she needs to find the reason she personally keeps the weight around and solve it and then - and only then will she be able to loose it.

Please keep in mind that extra weight (being fat) is a lot like mental illness.... there is some thing deeper controlling it.

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

JB, Hi and welcome!

This is something only she can do for self, and she has to want it. Her asking you to remind is only going to make her want the food that much more in a rebellious kind of way, I think, and feel like someone is trying to take what she wants away from her. I was able to lose a good deal of weight several years back, and it was something I had to journey in alone as far as friends and family went (excepting progress reports, etc.).

Maybe she can be held accountable at weight watchers or a similar program, letting you totally off the hook excepting the great "high five's"?

good luck!

Kd

Thanks for the imput. I just get frustrated when she asks for help, then gets mad cause I do, and then says I won't help her when I back off. Ugg. I'll suggest WW. JB