[Michaela00]

My husband left me and our 3 kids about 9 weeks ago. He's been back and forth not knowing if he wants his family or not. He was just diagnosed 2 weeks ago and can't see a doctor for meds for another month. Could his feelings of not knowing what he wants be the illness... or does he really not love me anymore? He's making bad decisions everyday concerning other parts of his life as well. Could his illness be the reason why he doesn't know what he wants?? I'm so confused!

[Leed]

What was his diagnosis? Is it bipolar, depression, anxiety, ??? It would help to know.

It's possible it could be due to his illness. How long has he been unable to make decisions? Has this been going on for some time? Has he been making bad decisions for quite awhile or just recently?

Probably after he's stabilized on his meds, he'll feel better about himself. Give him some time to get used to the meds. They won't work immediately -- it takes time for them to become affective. Plus the doc has to make sure he gets the proper dosage. So this could take awhile. Is your husband also going to be in therapy? I hope so, as it sounds like he could use it.

I wish you the very best. Try to be patient -- he needs some understanding right now. God bless. Hugs, Lee

I looked on your profile, so yes to Bipolar. Yes Bipolar can really flip peoples live upside down.

I'm really sorry this is happening. Leed asked some good questions about his past behavior. How did he take the diagnosis? For some of us, we already kinda knew and the news wasn't too bad. For others it comes as a complete surprise and that can really leave the person shaken up, even if you see the diagnosis coming it can still be very difficult to wrap your head around, much less accept.

There was one time in my life where my Bipolar played a big role in my decision to break things off with my boyfriend. I went through a very manic period followed with some heavy medication. The medication in part made me feel less attached to him, the mania tho made the problems we were having seem very huge. Also I felt like a burden to him with my illness, and I decided he would be better off to meet someone who was not mentally ill. Most of this was the bipolar talking, we did have some problems but they were workable. We did get back together after a few months, but it was a really hard time.

I was convinced that because of my illness that I should live a lonely existence and not involve anyone else in this or be a burden. I'm not sure what is going on with your husband, that was just my experience with this.

Hopefully he will get some medication to help and things can be worked out. This is so hard for everyone involved. The medication like Leed said can take a while to take effect. Bipolar is very treatable with medication, lifestyle choices, and therapy. Getting the meds right tho can be a really tricky process. It takes patience and percerverience. Some people do find meds that work well faster than others.

I second the therapy, medication alone can help, but therapy is very very helpful to someone with Bipolar.

I wish you well, I hope your husband will be able to get the help he needs soon, hopefully you both will be able to work this out. Take care, and don't be afraid to post on the bipolar forum either, if you have any questions.. People will be more than happy to help you. I hope you keep posting, I think you could use the extra support for yourself at this moment. Your wellbeing is just as important.