Can someone give me some advice about this...all responses are welcome. :(

I am currently in a relationship with someone i met online and i've known him since i was about 15, 16. Im 18 btw. I really like him alot and i know what he looks like but I've never actually seen his face. I've seen him from side and head down but never a face picture. I've asked him about this multiple times but he is very insecure about his looks. Now he knows i am somewhat insecure myself but since i care about him and trust him i've let him see me. Everytime i bring this up, however, he always says "i dont wanna talk about this right now so lets talk about something else". just the other night i asked him about it and he says hes been very stressed from work and school and doesn't wanna talk about it. its becoming so irritating that i dont even think the relationship will work anymore ...idk should i just be patient? i dont know how much longer i can be patient with him though....please someone help me

I'm sure this guy means well, but honestly at your age, i think you should step away from the computer and meet some real people. Hang out with friends, find hobbies you are interested in and meet people that way, or connect with people in school. There is someone out there for you.

I met someone online years and years ago when I was your age, and it was really unsafe, really gross, he looked nothing like I thought he did... and things went too far. I was safe but trust me, I truly wish I could erase it from my memory. And that was 15 years ago! Things are much more dangerous these days.

While everyone promotes online dating these days, it can be really dangerous and let's face it, you NEVER KNOW who is on the other side of the computer. There may be a reason that he doesn't want to show his face, and that may be because he's not who he says he is, or is not the age he says he is, who knows. But in general, that seems like a bad sign, especially if you've been talking to him for several years now.

Of course there is little way to know what the truth about this person is, but there are far other people in this world who you can interact with in person, who will show their face, and may take a lot of interest in you in real time with nothing to hide behind.

Whatever you chose to do, be careful. Good luck!

Psychgirl is absolutely right. There HAS to be some reason he doesn't want you to see his face. I'd be really leery of this guy. He may be hiding something -- for all you know, he might be wanted or something. Perhaps the cops are looking for him -- sounds weird, but stranger things have happened!

Things just aren't safe anymore. Like Psychgirl said, he may not be who he says he is. This could be a dangerous situation. I PRAY you didn't tell him where you live!! Please don't!! That would be the worst thing you could do!

Back away from this and try to meet some real people. It's safer, and healthier. I'm sure you'll meet some nice guy, who you can trust. Online dating just isn't safe.

God bless and please take care of YOU. Hugs, Lee

Thank you for your advice. I've been kind of thinking the same thing. And I honestly would love to meet people in real life but it's kinda hard for me. Idk I become very paranoid that someone doesn't like me and I'm being to weird or talking too much or I'm not pretty enough that I feel I'm gonna be alone for the rest of my life. I just feel a bit more comfortable talking over a computer. Honestly i've never had a relationship with someone in real life. Only online. And I know its unhealthy. But I can certainly see your point. He really may not be the person i believe he is... i hope that isn't the case. I'd be.. devistated.

thank you psych girl. He doesn't know my address just my state.
he has told me that he used to do drugs for a year and a half 5 years ago... I have thought maybe the drugs altered his looks. i do remember one time he told me that he doesn't look the way he is on the inside. sometimes i feel like im wasting my time but then i feel he's such a kind hearted person that i shouldn't bug him about it.

The scenario you have created does sound incredibly suspicious. I was a lot like you at your age and I also felt more comfortable once only meeting people without physically meeting them initially. Some people I would physically see, but I tried to use my best judgment. Judgment is definitely not everything. The first time I saw the person I was with (having met him online some fourteen plus years ago now) was at an airport. We decided to meet halfway between our states and spend the weekend together. I couldn't imagine doing this now, but something about him and talking with him by phone eased my fears. I felt completely his. But this being said, I am no longer willing to meet people online. I feel like it will happen that I meet someone somewhere and in speaking with them face to face, I will know they are genuine and their heart is something I connect with on not just a physical but emotional level. You are very young. Just take it one day at a time. Hang out with friends, let them introduce you to people. Are you in school? What about joining a club? Mutual interest groups are a great way to connect with someone. I should maybe take my own advice, but I'm a bit older than you and find this a bit more challenging just due to life experience. Hang in there and be safe.

I'm glad I could help. Honestly, just focus on your life, your goals, and enjoy yourself with friends and hobbies. Things will fall into place. It always ends up being the case that you find what your looking for when you're not looking for it.

The happier you are with yourself, the more confident you will be. Don't worry about others' opinions. Whatever people think? Its all out of your control. And if someone doesn't think well of you? It's up to you to give meaning to those ill words. And your confidence is key to tuning them out.

You're right. Drugs are bad, no picture is a red flag... Run dear :/ You deserve better.

I appreciate your advice very much. I would rather meet people in real life than online but thats a bit hard for me to do. I don't have any friends, I'm in the 12th grade but im homeshcooled so the only interaction i get with other people is those i met online and my family...i know i sound isolated but thats how things have been since i finished 9th grade. =/

I am happy with myself at times. other times my self esteem is extremely low. but ill pull through i hope. and i starting to think i probably should just walk away from this relationship. i've tried contacting him to sort things out but no answer. and he just left me an instant message asking whats my number...that certainly sounds fishy because he knows BOTH of my numbers.

Are there community groups in your area for high schoolers? The summer is here and I believe a great opportunity to see what activities for similar age students are available to you. I know home schooling does rather isolate families, but it doesn't have to be that way. Search online for public groups that facilitate interaction for home school students. Get some information about them and see what resonates with you, whether it's sports related, theater/acting (I might do something like this myself again), dance, exercise, theme park field trips, etc. You can do it. I believe in you. Baby steps, babiicakies. . Good luck.

Trust you gut that is telling you things sound fishy!

Well ill try to check and see. Hopefully there are those kinda groups where i live. that would be nice. I like theater/acting. sounds fun. Thank you so much. I will certainly take those baby steps lol.