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Old Jun 14, 2012, 02:16 AM
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jbug jbug is offline
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Location: NW Arkansas
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I have never been in this situation before where a nice "normal" stable or as well as I can tell person I think likes me. He is the newest neighbor in my building and I like him too. So you think so what is the problem. Well one of the "floppers" that is what I call the 2 women staying with my neighbor likes him too. Boy does she have it bad for him. I think he thinks of her as just a friend though. I don't know if he knows I don't work because he works a lot of hours. So he could just assume that I am at work when he is at work but I don't know. I think he does know though that I don't work and am on disability I hope though he doesn't know why. It's not like I am ashamed of being mentally ill but it's not really a good relationship starter.

I think this might just be the way for me to get over Rex the problem is I am still clinging to Rex and always having him come around. In fact I think my neighbor was going to ask me out this weekend but I was talking to Rex and asked him to come over on Saturday. I figured since is Zeke's "dad" he should get a Father's Day meal LOL. I am also going to get him a small box of chocolates from Bob Evans..they have one for a dollar. I am getting one for my Dad too just in case his real present doesn't get here on time.

Anyway I want to ask my neighbor to dinner sometime just as friends but don't want to hurt my other neighbor's feelings because like I said she has it bad for him. An example is the 2 floppers and I were outside talking this afternoon just shooting the breeze and she asked me if I had seen his light saber. I said no and she said it is so cool its blue and I dead panned which light saber and she turned all shades of red and said oh no not you too. If all of us are outside she tries to manipulate all his time but the whole time he is talking to her he is looking at me. While I was on the phone with Rex he was hovering and as soon as I was done and hung up he was BAM right there talking to me again.

I don't know how to handle this...only nutcases like me. I don't know how to deal with a "normal" guy with a good stable job, good education and even bonus good looks.

I am not stable now and don't want to drag him into my drama. I can't handle this right now. I have icky guy in the other building that seriously needs to put a shirt on and then nice normal guy.

What do I do?

Jan
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  #2  
Old Jun 14, 2012, 02:29 AM
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eskielover eskielover is offline
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Location: Kentucky, USA
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He's the newest guy in your apartment building....you don't really even know him yet.....who knows....he may be a nut case hiding in a good looking guy's disguise......then again, he might just be that nice guy you have been waiting for.....only time will tell on that.

Take it easy.....I always figure if it's meant to be, I won't have to force it, it will happen naturally & things will work out to get to know him even better.

There will always be more girls chasing after a good looking guy, that's just the way that is....just be there & talk & get to know him better before you jump to any conclusions that "this is the guy".

Don't know if inviting him to dinner might come across a bit like chasing.....don't know how current dating procedures are....but back in my dating days, inviting a guy to dinner in your apartment wasn't the best starting place. Someplace out in public where you can really get to know him in a safe environment ......would be my suggestion.
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  #3  
Old Jun 14, 2012, 02:56 AM
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jbug jbug is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eskielover View Post
He's the newest guy in your apartment building....you don't really even know him yet.....who knows....he may be a nut case hiding in a good looking guy's disguise......then again, he might just be that nice guy you have been waiting for.....only time will tell on that.

Take it easy.....I always figure if it's meant to be, I won't have to force it, it will happen naturally & things will work out to get to know him even better.

There will always be more girls chasing after a good looking guy, that's just the way that is....just be there & talk & get to know him better before you jump to any conclusions that "this is the guy".

Don't know if inviting him to dinner might come across a bit like chasing.....don't know how current dating procedures are....but back in my dating days, inviting a guy to dinner in your apartment wasn't the best starting place. Someplace out in public where you can really get to know him in a safe environment ......would be my suggestion.
I was thinking that after I got my check next month that maybe we could go to Applebees or something like that just to get to know each other but don't want any hurt feelings among the neighbors. I would make it completely clear that it isn't a date that it is 2 people dining in the same restaurant at the same table. Right now I am trying to figure out the meal for tonight. It seems everyone in our crowd..it seems amazing I have a crowd but anyway almost everyone is having a bad week with the exception of a couple of us so to cheer us up I am grilling tonight. So far I have pork chops, vidalia onions, corn and salad. I am trying to figure out dessert or even if I am going to have dessert. When I am at Walmart I am going to look in the deli and see if they have Oreo fluff. Since it is Oreo's birthday they might. So I just went out not to long ago and stuck notes in their doors saying not to cook supper I am grilling.
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Old Jun 14, 2012, 09:39 AM
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Leed Leed is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
The way I figure it, is "all's fair in love and war." If this guy has shown SOME interest in you, then invite him to dinner. Why not? He has NOT invited this other girl out, and she does NOT have any claims on him. I see no problem in you inviting him to dinner. If she gets upset, she'll get over it. Just tell her that he DID show interest in you -- which he DID.

Things are different these days. Women don't just sit back and wait for the guy to make the first move. If we did that, we'd be waiting til dooms day. There are times we HAVE to make the first move -- men EXPECT that these days. So go ahead and ask him. It sure can't hurt -- and I'll bet he accepts too! Have fun -- and best of luck! Hugs, Lee
  #5  
Old Jun 14, 2012, 11:59 AM
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Perna Perna is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
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It sounds like you are doing fine, taking it slow? I would make a little plan and ask him for supper or dessert or something, not particularly fancy. Since you don't know him too well yet, he could be playing all the women, your flopper friend, looking for whatever he can get; you are right you need to get to know him better, learn about his saber, cool blue or red hot :-) and just see if something more is possible. Slow enough will give the other women a chance to see what direction he's moving (currently, they're free to invite him to dinner too) and you get to see how he reacts (if he is playing with everyone to see what he can get) and just kind of get a general feel for him.
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  #6  
Old Jun 14, 2012, 09:20 PM
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jbug jbug is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2002
Location: NW Arkansas
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Well I found out tonight we won't be seeing much of him for awhile as he got his internet hooked up and he will be playing WoW in fact I cooked for him and the girls and he scarfed it down drank his beer and ran home to play.

So will wait awhile to let the newness wear off of his internet and then start to ease my way into his life. That is unless the "flopper" did because I saw her leave the apartment we were eating at but she wasn't outside with the rest of the crowd.

Jan
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