[drunksunflower]

stupid stupid stupid

today work was work i talked to my good client and the secretary of my weird client and did some analysis and did some organising for work i am going away for this weekend

and it was ok i guess my manager is slightly mad so got stuff done for her all last minute and yea. was reassured on the madness of manager by a colleague who finds it hard to work for her not ***** session but wow im not the only one that finds it full on well thats good i guess

anyway promised drinks with my gorgeous friends we had wine and pizza it was nice then i just got so

antisocial

like i couldnt go out i just could notgo party and have a normal thursday night i just thought i wud cry got to stage of dressing up hot and doing each others makeup then i just lost it had to say i was sick WHY does this happen it is SO SO dumbass i dont even know how to cope anymore

i am sick of this it may sound like NOTHING to anyone else but i cant stop crying and this isnt right

i dunno

sorry to blah on a message board. i cant go see my flatmate he will think im cracking up.

i dunno what to do

[SeptemberMorn]

It's not stupid! Those are symptoms of something, possibley social anxiety or anxiety of some sort. Don't need to tell you there is help out there, right? You need to get that help for yourself.

Please take care of YOU.

[tracylee]

It's not stupid at all!! I know how this feels, I havent been out of the house now for about 3 weeks!!! I dont like outside, i feel like i am not in control of my safety. I worry like hell if my son goes out or my man goes out. I make all the excuses under the sun not to go out!! My home makes me feel safe and that, at the moment, is important to me. So, no, it's not stupid at all. I empathise with you totally!! Funnily enough, when its dark outside, i will go and stand on the door step and grumble at the miserable world and the evil things people do to each other!!