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I think this is the right place to post this... If it isn't, please move it to the correct location! xD

Sometimes I feel like someone else is pulling the strings. I'm a very easily swayed person- I'm not proud of it, but things that people say get into my head and change my actions/reactions.

I'm in a relationship with the father of my child. (We'll call him S.) We've been together for the last six years. I met him on MySpace when I was 15 (I just turned 22, he's almost 25). We have been living together since day one. Late last summer, things took a bad turn for me. I suffered in silence for several years and finally gave up the fight. I left and moved in with my grandmother until I could find myself a job and an apartment.

However, way before I actually left, I entered into an emotional affair with a man I went to high school with. I'll call him P. It was everything I needed that I wasn't getting from S. At the time, S. wasn't working- hadn't for a couple years. All he did was play World of Warcraft. I played, too, but not nearly as much. I don't have a problem with video games or MMOs, but he was addicted to the worst possible degree. He talked to his friends on there more than he talked to me or anyone else. There's a lot more to it than that, but I don't want this to be a TL;DR wall o' text.

To make it very short, I miss the things I did while I was gone from S. There is so, SO much more, but... yeah. I'm confused and I don't know what to do.

Edit: Allow me to elaborate on the problem. I still harbor some sort of feelings for P. It confuses and upsets me and I have tried everything to make it go away. What do I do?

Heya..

Sorry that things feel tough right now. But they will get better! And it's easy (and common) to put our rose-tinted glasses on when we split up from someone, esp if we feel lonely or a little low in confidence. (not saying you are feeling either of those things).

But, you split up for a reason, and try to remember that you had your reasons. If you were to get back together, things may not change and all the old problems would still be there. You were very young when you met, and I guess all you know at the mo. There is a whole world of people out there, so please remember you don't have to settle for second best.

Mr P, how do you feel about him really? Is it a rebound thing do you think? My advice is to take some time out of dating either of them for a while, give yourself some TLC and some friends/fun time? At least when the dust settles you'll probably be clearer to what you want.

Hugs.

[Leed]

Hi ~ I have to agree with Riotgrrrl ~ You're quite young, and haven't really had the chance to experience LIFE. You were tied down VERY early, so now is the time to spread your wings!

It's time to meet new people, go places and do things. It's also time to treat yourself with patience and care. Pamper yourself and be kind to yourself. I doubt that either of those guys were very tender to you or what you could call "loving." So be "loving" to yourself. Did you know that you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else? It's true!

So like Riotgrrrl said, take some time -- think about the past and I'll bet your don't WANT to go back to that!! You have a bright new future ahead of you and I'm sure you'll be able to find a wonderful, KIND, LOVING man too! Make SURE you don't find the same kind of guy you had before.

God bless my friend, and please take care! Hugs, Lee

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S made huge changes for the better after I left. He understands that I left for both of us, because we had become a 'we' and not a 'he and I', if you know what I mean. He completely lost his sense of self somewhere along the way, and forced me to lose mine. I do love him with all my heart and things are so much better between us now. He treats me the way I deserve to be treated- well, with love and respect. That's all I ever wanted.

As for P... well, it's very complicated. To the worst possible degree.

[Confusedinomicon]

Are you sure you're not falling back to S because he is something that you know and that you're comfortable with? Is he someone you really want to stay with? Are you sure he will not go back to his video games? Or, if you let S back into your life you can start off new and not move back in with him for a yearish? to make sure he is committed to a future with you.

Maybe you should focus on your future and not worry about romance too much. You could work towards an associates degree so you can get a job that will reward your diligence.

No-contact to P. If you don't want to be involved with him anymore, tell him and stop contacting him. (AKA Block him on FB, screen his calls on your phone and don't meet up with him in person)