Stuck up friends

There is this girl that has problems at my school, has a disability. She hates the fact she has a disability so she goes around labeling others with all kinds of disorders. Very rude in my opinion. She wound up with no friends. She talks to me only when she is alone and had no one else to talk to that she likes better, so in other words, I'm basically her back up friend, hate that. She is constantly asking for money and when she is by herself, she gets very needy and she will get mad if I decide to not keep her company and she will even try looking for me around campus, once she got into the residence hall I live in and searched every floor for me. If I'm sitting in the College Center Square, a big gathering area in the main academic building at my college, she will come and talk to me but if someone else comes around, I don't exist. I no longer tolerate that so I've been avoiding her a lot lately during the year, except the summer when we have no school. I think her problem is that she can't accept the fact that she has a disability and feels the need to put others down and use others. She sees things she wishes she had in others which may be the root problem. When she is around me, all she does is complain about her boyfriend or the people she lives with at her apartment. She also skips class and leaves class early or arrives late a lot and when she gets bad grades and even failed a couple classes, she blamed others for that. So yeah, sorry, I know this is long. But yeah, she is one of the few fake people I deal with who uses others and treats some people like me poorly and even act like I'm her back up friend. I understand she has a disability, but I still feel like she shouldn't be acting that way and I've been told by numerous people that they can also see that she only thinks of me as a back up friend and someone she can use.

This situation is a tough one. You might be like me, and want to help folks who might be neglected/mistreated by others.

I'm not a mental-health professional, but I suspect this young woman is trying to build herself up by putting other people down. It sounds like she needs some serious therapy.

I honestly don't know if confronting her would work. She might become very defensive. I know you don't want to hurt her either.

Gee, I really don't know what to suggest. Maybe ask her about getting therapy--seeing the school counselor? Telling her you just aren't able to give her what she needs?

Help! What do you other folks think?

Yeah, actually, other people have confronted her and she got very mad, put it all over Facebook, talked about people behind their backs, and says that they re the stuck up and arrogant ones. Yeah she definitely is trying to put others down to make herself feel better. She has everyone do everything for her and they probably would feel bad if they didn't, I will admit, I was the same way at first when I was getting to know her, because I didn't want to be seen as being rude to someone with a disability and still feel that way a bit but I know I can now say no without being too rude. Actually, I have been avoiding her and ignoring her texts if possible, she gets mad and desperate during the school year because she does not want to be alone but now that we are on summer break, she barely talks to me unless she is bored, and even admits she is bored everytime she talks to me. So I'm going to just start ignoring her Facebook messages and texts during the summer as well. I believe she could also have some kind of personality disorder as well. She also dates someone 16 years older than her, she is 22 and her fiancé is 38, and no one supports her since she ven admitted her boyfriend is very immature and paranoid, all they do is argue, not a good couple. I do agree that she may need counseling. she says she doesn't care if she has friends but I think that's a lie due to the way she acts when she's actually by herself. Trust me, after seeing her, I know it sounds rude, but despite feeling used, I actually feel relieved that she is no longer with me, then when I see her coming, I get this really annoyed and disgusted feeling and wish she would go away. I can be too nice at times but am working on that to not let others like her use me.

Okay she has a lot of problems and issues. But why do you allow her to latch onto you ? You do not have to be around her or text her or have her on your facebook.

You can say "No" regardless of her disability, it does not matter. She is affecting your life in a negative manner.

Just say No and go about your life .
Good luck.

Thank you, and actually she has been hearing no from me a bit and have been ignoring her texts a bit but I'm going to do it way more now so she will see that I want no part of her.