[Naturefreak]

I decided to try online dating again and I noticed that when I
added a photo of myself I got about 10 views in one day compared
to maybe 1 on a good day. What is that telling me ? What do I
do next ? Contact them and tell them I'm a very honest caring
person BUT I'm depressed and have social anxiety issues .
I really want to date again, but feeling the way I do , I have
pretty much come to the conclusion that there is NO HOPE in
that department. I'm like a school kid when it comes to picking
up women anyway . I've been called a recycled teenager by some.
But that's me , I wouldn't want to change a thing except this
baggage. I'm not looking for sex , but how do you get a woman
to believe that ? I guess I'll give it some time and if I don't
engage in a date within the next 5 years I'll know then it's
hopeless

[jerrymichele]

Hi baby I would never come right out and tell people of your medical issues, not unless you are in a serious relationship. Just IMO when I was dating I would always try to stay very positive, and get to know one another first. I really don't know to much about dating sites, but if someone showed interest in me I would most defendantly go check it out. If you don't pressure a woman for sex than she should know your not after that. Do they have a singles club where you live at?

[marjan]

Originally Posted by jerrymichele

Hi baby I would never come right out and tell people of your medical issues, not unless you are in a serious relationship. Just IMO when I was dating I would always try to stay very positive, and get to know one another first. I really don't know to much about dating sites, but if someone showed interest in me I would most defendantly go check it out. If you don't pressure a woman for sex than she should know your not after that. Do they have a singles club where you live at?

Well...don't worry...you are really not alone in this era...lots of us have the same problem...I've been on online dating and never worked for me...but that doesn't discourage me to try it again...just right now, I'm not in the mood for dating....hope in couple of months when I feel better, I will put a nice profile with a good picture up there....
My sister got married through online dating and she has two kids now...
My friend got married just recently, again she found her husband on online dating....
But, things that are working for everybody may not work for us....I think positive attitudes are the key....just lay back and enjoy it....There are lots of women out there that are craving to go out with you!
In term of your depression, I would never tell somebody up front...wait...and see how it goes...I'm sure you will be fine

take care and keep us up to date when you find that special person
Marjan

[Naturefreak]

Thanks jerrymichelle , There may be singles clubs around ,
I never looked into that as I'm not good in crowds . I tend
to panic and look for the first available exit . How do you
get around not telling them about your illness , I'm sure some
subject will bring up the issue and I'm not going to lie to her,
that would not be a good start. Thanks I appreciate any tips
I can get. Teach this old man some new tricks lol

[marjan]

Originally Posted by Babysteps09

Thanks jerrymichelle , There may be singles clubs around ,
I never looked into that as I'm not good in crowds . I tend
to panic and look for the first available exit . How do you
get around not telling them about your illness , I'm sure some
subject will bring up the issue and I'm not going to lie to her,
that would not be a good start. Thanks I appreciate any tips
I can get. Teach this old man some new tricks lol

join meetup.com...you can find lots of activities....besides...dancing will help you a big time....try to register for a salsa lessons....it's a great exercise and it will help you with your problem!

[jerrymichele]

Originally Posted by marjan

join meetup.com...you can find lots of activities....besides...dancing will help you a big time....try to register for a salsa lessons....it's a great exercise and it will help you with your problem!

Baby, Marjan is on to something here. Most women love to dance. If your just starting out dating I would just enjoy living in the moment. If your having fun this shouldn't just pop up. No I don't think that you should lie about your illness. You want a potential partner to see you for you, and not your illness. A person who truly cares for you will stick with you threw thick and thin. I know how you feel. Some people tend to think that a person with a mental disorder is crazy. That is so far from the truth. You know I have panic disorder, and my friends never have insulted me, but my family has. When you start dating just live in the moment, and stay positive. Honestly your a nice guy,and your funny. I think that you will do just find. I know that this sounds strange, but you could also go to the local book store to meet single people. Lots of people love to read. You could also have a friend set you up on a blind date. If you do go to a singles club, bring a single friend (guy) with you. That might help with the panic if someone is with you. If your nervous about introducing yourself, just do it like you do here. Just start talking and making conversation. Keep posting to us baby.

[fantasticfour]

During my last hospitalization I noticed how understanding and caring the patients were to each other. I have a website started that focuses on those with psyche issues. It is called shared shoulders and even though I am still working on it, you can still put up a profile. It is free for full access. Thanks, Greg

[hamster-bamster]

Originally Posted by Naturefreak

I noticed that when I added a photo of myself I got about 10 views in one day compared to maybe 1 on a good day. What is that telling me ? What do I do next ?

That is completely normal. All dating sites and social networks have the same stats: people whose profiles have pictures have many more views. This has nothing to do with depression.

PLEASE!!! Use the default font, because with your elaborate formatting, it is very hard to quote your posts.

Depression, in my opinion, is not that big a deal on the current dating scene, but schizophrenia definitely is, so count yourself lucky. Not that you need to disclose it right off the bat, of course. But when it gets to that point, it is not that big a deal because it is very common.

"Anyone know of a depression dating site ?"

Yeah, it's called Psych Central!

[manwithnofriends]

surely relationship failures are just one cause of depression... so I wouldn't date if I were you.

[ptangptang]

Well. I would look on meetup.com first and see what you fancy within travelling distance. I joined nolongerlonely .com but a) they don't seem to have a lot of people ( and they seem hesitant about coming forward) b) it doesn't seem very active and c) do you want to meet people with mental illness. I would try normal dating sites first ( POF say cos its free) and see how you go. Depression is so common nowadays that if two people get on it shouldn't be a biggi. Maybe just join as many clubs as you feel comfortable going to and if sex is a problem well you can always pay for it. Maybe the government should see it as a social service and subsidise it. Maybe that would make for a healthier society.

[DALcake]

There are resource links at the top of Psych Central, check out the dating links

[everywhereanywhere]

all of them I am trying that now while feeling down and out trust me dating is hard enough its even harder when you feel down . As a woman I over think everything a million times. And on a date when I dont get a call back or something I blame myself most dating or dating sites are hit or miss just keep trying you'll get there

The problem with dating sites is you see a photo first then what they want you to read. For depressed people this can be very superficial and triggering. Also, you get a lot of views during the trial because you are at the top of "new members". That's how they hook you. Not trying to dissuade but if you continue know that you have pay to be close to the top. Think of the competition for models. Beautiful people don't get picked. It's mostly beautiful lucky or connected people. That isn't to say it doesn't work. Just know that upfront.

Dating another depressed person has it's own set of challenges. You can bring each other down. Feed on each other.

I third (or fourth?) meetup. Getting involved in activities you like is the best way to avoid the anxiety you are felling about telling somebody. Another option is classes. There are always more women than men in those classes.

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