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  #1  
Old Feb 16, 2014, 12:43 PM
blue592 blue592 is offline
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I'm a senior in college and lately I feel like in don't relate to people the way I did in the previous three years. I'm extremely passionate about my career goals and I get more serious with each passing day. Even if I tried to change this I couldn't be because I'm doing what I love above anything else. I have an amazing group of friends who have the same goals as me, but I just don't feel like they are nearly as devoted as I am. I'm starting to feel quite different from all of them. For example, after a long day/evening of school I like to be alone and decompress and even spend a lot of weekend nights alone. Most people I know cannot spend any time alone. They go straight from school to hang out with friends or their boyfriends for the rest of the night. They are constantly communicating with people through social media in class. I just don't understand it. When I feel drained and tired and I force myself to hang out with people it's a chore. I would love a boyfriend but as much as I force myself, there is no guy my age I am interested in putting the time in for. I've found one unavailable guy over the whole 4 years that I've had feelings for. He's the only guy I know that shares the passions I do, but obviously I couldn't be with him.

In general, my goals and values are becoming quite different from those of my friends. rapidly. I guess maybe I don't want to spend much time with my friends anymore because I no longer feel a connection with them? I just feel very isolated, and it depresses me. I sort of felt like this senior year of high school too. I didn't feel this way in my previous college years. Any advice?



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  #2  
Old Feb 16, 2014, 12:52 PM
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HazelGirl HazelGirl is offline
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I am in college right now, and I went through that when I was in high school. It's very normal, and it would be good to try to find others who are similar to you. They're out there, just harder to find because they're quieter and more serious.
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  #3  
Old Feb 16, 2014, 03:48 PM
pinkbutterfly pinkbutterfly is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2013
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there is nothing wrong with wanting to spend time by yourself. needing time to yourself to decompress and relax is what many many people need. some people recharge by being around others, some do not.

it makes sense as you're moving toward graduation that your seriousness about your degree and career pursuits get more serious. You're about to enter another phase in your life where you need to be serious about your career. And if you love it...all the better!!

As long as you are happy with how you are...and you do have a few people in your life that you can talk to and confide in, i see no problems with what's going on.

Feelings of isolation make sense -- so...maybe there's some balance needed in time to yourself versus hanging out with friends.

For me...I DREAD going to parties, or being with big groups of people. I love to have my alone time, but I do get lonely. So for me...getting together with one or two friends is what I love. It takes me out of my isolated feelings, and I get out of the house.
Thanks for this!
AllyIsHopeful
  #4  
Old Feb 18, 2014, 03:17 AM
AllyIsHopeful AllyIsHopeful is offline
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It is possible to "outgrow" your friends. Pinkbutterfly has a good point, you are ready to start that next chapter of your life. Perhaps your friends are not ready to let go of this chapter quite yet. That's okay, everyone grows and progresses differently. Seems like you are more motivated and passionate and that's a good thing. Loving your career will give you a competitive edge because that stuff shows through your work and dedication. It's just a little bump in the road. Maybe looking forward to graduation and practicing guided imagery can help? Envision how good you will feel once you are done and beginning to look for a job or internship. I'm sure once you begin putting your degree to use, you will make new friends who are on the same level as you. Hang in there.
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