[Spaceship]

Sorry for the bad english and grammar
In my new member intro I said how my mum wojld not take me to the dovtor. She wants to ask my dad but he doesnt want me yo go eiyher. Today hr is coming home (his job means he has to travel a lot) and he said will will talk abouy it. When we have talked before about me being"moody" he gets really angry because I don't want to talk so I end up just sayin I dont know. I dont want to tell him that I thinki have depression or bipolar or something because th at will make them noy want to take me to a doctor even more. please help, I would have posted this last night but my mum took my phone away because evidently im six not sixteen.

I cant just say what I think and I dont want him to get angry becausethats scary. Hes never hit me or anything but I hate it when he shouts. Hr has shouted at me before for "looking at him with an attitude" when I eas lookingat him normally I was just scared. Please help

[healingme4me]

Well, it's good he's never hit you before, indicative he more than likely won't if you talk to him.

There isn't much, that is more frustrating for parents than a child who doesn't open up.

Instead of saying I don't know, say what you mean, say what you feel. Even if to say, you want to stop feeling scared of them when they've really not given you any reason. And you want to speak to a doctor because you feel they could help with such anxiety and your moods.


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[Spaceship]

Originally Posted by healingme4me

Well, it's good he's never hit you before, indicative he more than likely won't if you talk to him.

There isn't much, that is more frustrating for parents than a child who doesn't open up.

Instead of saying I don't know, say what you mean, say what you feel. Even if to say, you want to stop feeling scared of them when they've really not given you any reason. And you want to speak to a doctor because you feel they could help with such anxiety and your moods.


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But I cant say th at. He asked me once if I had depression and I said I dont know and he said " no you dont. Dont be stupid." I am really scared abd I am gettimg the bus tonigt so maybe I could stay away for a bit?

[healingme4me]

Why run? No matter where you go, there you are. What types of depression treatment are you hoping for with the doctor?

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[allme]

Hi

sorry your parents are not understanding.

I had problems in my teens and my parents too were not very helpful or understanding. At the age of 17, I went to the doctors by myself. It was scary but once I started to open up it all came spilling out. Maybe you should just go by yourself, your 16, right?

[Spaceship]

Thank you but what do I say to my parents?????

[sophiej14]

he's shouting at you because he's afraid, afraid of what he doesn't understand.
They probably already suspect that something is not right, hence their reaction.
Just put it out there sweetie and be open with your parents.

You are 16 and you can go to your doctor alone. Maybe you should try that first so you have something conclusive to discuss with your parents.

x

[jadzea]

If you can, go to a doctor yourself and then ask your parents to go back with you and meet with the doctor. He/she will explain what is happening to you in an impersonal, non judgemental way. Your parents should not feel threatened . They can ask questions and the doctor can reassure them that they are not the cause of any problems you may have. The doctor may say many of the things you want to say to your parents but they will believe it more coming from the doctor. Don't be afraid. You have to take care of yourself. Who knows? Maybe the doctor will say you just need a small change in your life and you will be OK. That at least will make you feel better.

[Spaceship]

The thank you buton doesnt seem like enough right now.

[sabby]

Spaceship, maybe you can sit down and write out what your concerns are, your feelings and such. That way, when you freeze up and can't talk, you have something in writing to either read to your parents or you can hand it to them to read.

I know it's hard sometimes, but forcing yourself to be present and ask for the help you need is so very important. I really hope you can work through this hon.

[Spaceship]

I'm sorry. I messed up. My dad tried to talk to me. I planned what I was going to say: I think I have a mental health problem. But I just kept saying I don't know! He kept repeating my answers and started shouting really loudly, using the f word and s word a lot. Also he was angry because they bought a prom dress and £100 of it is non refundable because I don't want to go because they kind of forced me into it. I didn know what to say as to why I didn't want to go and why I want to see a doctor so he kept shouting at me. It really scared me. Then he said if I wanted to go to the doctor I had to ring up myself and get my own sorry *** over there. Then he went for a bout ten seconds and I thought he went downstairs so I started to cry because I was so scared and upset and shocked. Then he didn't go downstairs and came into my room again and said what are you going to have a little cry now? Stop taking everything so f-ing seriously! Then i ate two chocolate bars in my room that i had hidden and now i feel fat and still rubbish.

As I was writing this he came in again and said in a dangerous quiet voice I'm sorry for shouting but you really wound me up. Do you want to tell me what's the matter or do you not know? Well obviously I don't want to look at him let alone talk to him in case he gets angry again so I said I don't know and be said right. And walked out again. I don't want to have dinner with him and the rest of my family or spend the rest of half term with him when he could shout at me at any minute. I am so scared that I have considered running away and suicide. Please help. If there was ever a time I thought he was going to hit me, it was then.

[Spaceship]

Also I have just made a doctors appointment!!!!

[TheOriginalMe]

Originally Posted by Spaceship

Also I have just made a doctors appointment!!!!

That's a really brave thing to have done and I'm glad that you have taken the right step to getting the help ypu need.

I know that you must be very upset because of what has happened with your dad and I wouldn't want to justify his behaviour but he sounds quite stressed. However, his reaction was extreme and unjustified and it is no wonder that you feel like you want to stay away from him. Is there anybody in your family who might be able to support you, an aunty or uncle perhaps?

[moremi]

Try writing him a letter and pour your soul out in it. Tell him also ur afraid to speak on it bc you dont want to be yelled at, that you are sick and desperately need his help to get you into the doctor. Tell him about the suicidal thoughts. I know if my daughter told me these things I would male her an immediate appointment. I think your father is concerned but also short tempered and scared bc he doesnt know whats wrong with his child. Honey just open up on paper and give it to your parents. You will be glad that they finally know whats going on inside your mind and will know its time to seek professional help.

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[Spaceship]

Thank you, I will bear this in mind. All my family live far away as my mum and dad moved away when they were married. But I am going to see a new doctor so she will know nothing about me and I hope she helps me release everything I havent been able to put into words.

[Spaceship]

Thank you! I will do this!