i feel like hes to overbearing

so a situation just happened with me and my bf its really bothering me. we have been together six years and aren't living together or any plans of marriage. I find myself wanting to scream for all of the stupid things in our relationship. for one I feel he's very overbearing and its driving me insane.
this situation that just happened went like this, he calls me waking me out of sleep to ask what is on my credit card because he did a credit check on himself and it shows an amount ( I placed him on my cred card because I have amazing credit and his was s**t and I was helping him bring up his score, he never had access to my card ) and I say yes and tell him he shouldn't even be showing anything because I tiook him off it a few months back when we broke up for about a month.
he then freaks out saying I have lied to him about not telling him how much debt is on my credit card which is in fact only $1700.00 which I feel is not a lot considering I pay more than the bill each month and pay always on time. which is not only making my credit fine and practically perfect but also raising his, which I didn't have to do in the first place.
then he gets all crazy and wants to see what I have bought so being the truthful gf I am I give him the passwords so he can see for himself, as hes going through he begins to try and accuse me of being shady. ( a hotel stay was was in fact for us was on there but he didn't realize it because we booked it a month early for something we were going to
this is extremely irritating, it shouldn't matter what my debt is, we aren't living together or married, he is no longer on the credit card and I helped him raise his score. anytime there is a question of things I do or say im a terrible person/ liar, but if I ask for the same info I get yelled at and called clingy and what you. I prolly should have told him how much it was but in honesty im embarrassed by it...I dunno why its I don't even consider it being in real debt I can pay it off no problem im just keeping my credit up. then its like I can't talk to him and explain that im embarrassed because I get called a psyco and told I have issues for keeping it hidden.
its like if I keep anything to myself about anything strictly to do with me, finanaces goals, people I talk to, im a lying p.o.s. but if I do the same im psyco.
I haven't even tiold him I am a member of this site because then he will want to read everything I have said whom I talked to, even though I have never mentioned names or anything that would our identities away. I cant talk to him to express how I feel, he doesn't understand he claims to be open but in fact hes very if people don't agree with everything he says does or projects then your the crazy one. so a lot of the time I feel I have to hide things from himso I don't get flipped out on and called a liar.
it isn't fair to me, I want to be able to tell him everything and anything, and never hide anything, but how can I not want to close down myself from him when all I get is the negative, nothing positive for my views/situations. I feel like a bad gf, but at the same time I don't feel like im doing anything wrong, im not hurting him, im not cheating or doing anything of that nature. im just trying to find someone who will understand how I feel and help me since he isn't
so am I a bad gf for hiding things when they are really none of his business anyways?

No, I don't think your a bad gf for not telling him everything (and the fact is, you are an autonomous person, he has no RIGHT to know EVERYTHING)....and I'm sure his attitudes are crazy-making. Kinda passive aggressive.

The next time he tries that stuff (on the phone) tell him that he is making you uncomfortable with all of his demands to know information that does not affect him, and then tell him you can't talk right now, and hang up. Boundries, darlin...boundries.

If he's with you in person, say the same thing and then notify him, in a matter-of-fact way (i.e. non-threatening) that you don't intend to discuss things that have no bearing on him or your relationship. Period. And that if he continues to badger you, you're going to leave because you have other things to do, besides argue with him.

And STOP feeling guilty for not telling him everything. I'm not saying hiding stuff is a good thing in a relationship, but honestly....if you feel the need to share everything, then find a priest and lay it on. There are a lot of things that are not helped in a relationship by stark honestly--in fact, they can breed misunderstandings and resentment. Trust me on this, I know from where I speak.

The important thing is don't let him bully you. Find the boundries that make you comfortable, explain them to him, and then stick to them. It will be odd and awkward at first, but the more you commit to them, the easier it will be to deal with your bf, and maybe even grow to LIKE him a little more....sounds now that you're completely annoyed with him, for good reason. So remember when you shut his tantrum down, you are doing so from a place of love and wanting to like him again....instead of resenting him cause he makes you feel bullied.

Good luck

the funniest thing about all this is he has his own debt whihc is about a grand on its own, but i never say a word to him about his money and how he spends it, i don't even care to ask. it isn't important to me, but even after he complains he still comes to me when he wants me to buy him something he doesn't want to pay for himself....childish idiot

Ace, it's his job to bring up his own credit score, not yours. Seeing that you're not living together and not talking about marriage and he keeps trying to cadge presents out of you, I think it would probably be wise to change your password, keep his name off your credit cards, and maybe even have the credit card company issue you a new card with a new number. When you gave him your password, it gave him access to your credit. Seeing that he's acting so hinky and suspicious, well, I suspect him of maybe not having the best intentions in the world.

I tend to think that way whenever someone starts making a lot of unfounded accusations. Seems like they're usually talking about their own guilty thoughts and actions, and blaming (projecting) it all on the other person.

It's not a big hassle to have the credit card company issue you a new card with a new number, with his name not attached to it in any way. Then watch your statement carefully for odd charges in the next billing cycle.

He won't like it. Too darn bad. He's behaved badly and it's not your job to save his credit or assuage his angry feelings when he really is giving you a hard time you don't deserve.

Good advice.

Plus one more, waking you up, middle of the night, turn off the ringer. Forget it, you deserve uninterrupted sleep.

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Uhm, what makes this guy such a great catch? I'd think SERIOUSLY about continuing in this relationship, as money issues come between a LOT of couples and cause them to split. If you aren't on the same page money wise, either get there or cut him loose.

I think you were wrong to put him on your account without his agreeing to that. But that's in the past now. Do keep your business as your business. If the two of you were to get serious with the potential of being partners in life, then he would have every right in the world to want to know your financial situation. If that potential doesn't exist, then I kind of wonder what the two of you are doing after six years. He has no business praying into what you do on forums like this, so don't discuss it with him. He'll just get inappropriately curious.

With a guy like him, you may have to put out an extra effort to keep your boundaries and be your own person. If this credit card thing is the biggest issue you've had, then I don't think it's all that big a deal.