Happy me, I can say I said something :)

Today I ask my hubby where the little garden spade was. He said it was on top of the shelving unit that I keep my garden tools in. I looked and it was there. I then went into the house and very nicely said "You are tall and I am short. I can't see things if they are put up high like that." I did it, I actually said something. Boy I was on a high for hours after that. I had an appointment with my PDoc today. I am wondering what little notes he is going to put on my chart for my T to read. "In a manic state, laughing spontaneously, moving hands continously, and talking incessantly." Tee hee. He has seen me in a good mood only once before and made note of it then. My T read it to me. It is very strange to hear what other people write about you. My T has offered to let me read his notes, it was just too creepy to contemplate.
Zen<font color=blue>

Those who know they do not know gain wisdom. Those who pretend they know ramain ignorant. Those who acknowledge their weakness become strong. Those who flaunt their power will lose it. Wisdom and power follow truth above all. For truth is the way of Tao. --from the Tao Te Ching

Good for you! I am glad you are feeling happy. What a great feeling. That is good that your T will let you read his notes. You may not choose to do so, but I am sure it inspires trust in him. He must be good.

Congratulations! Good for you!

Re' reading T's notes: what a scary idea. I guess I never thought that my Pdoc/T would ever let me see those. He's never offered. I've never asked. Now you have me wondering...

Yes, I really trust my T. He is a cool guy. When he really messes up he apologizes to me. When I am angry with him he doesn't take it personally, he looks at it as a way to improve his practice. He is very concerned about the well-being of his clients. In fact just last session he was concerned that his getting new plants and adjusting the blinds to add more light might be distressing to some of his patients. I didnt even notice the changes but he wanted to make sure it was ok with me. LOL

Hearing what someone else has written about you is a surreal experience at least it is for me. My mood and level of wellness varies so greatly from session to session so I forget what I was like a week or even a day before. To hear what I was going through helps provide me with a sense of continuity that I do not have otherwise. Dan takes time every so often to remind me of the things I have accomplished and the progression of my therapy. One time he offered to give me my whole file to look at. I turned him down, it was a little too freaky. My file is as big as a book now, I have been going to him for almost 3 years, that adds up to a lot of notes.

Talking about continuity, that is one reason I like it here so much. The people here share good stuff as well as what is bothering them. This helps me to look back and remember where I was. Yes I felt this way, or that way. Wow, I remember feeling good like that. OH man, it hurts when I feel like that. Being here helps me remember all the different parts of me at the same time. You all have been so great. Thanks.
Zen<font color=green>

Deal with the difficult while it is still easy. Solve large problems when they are still small. Preventing large problems by taking small steps is easier the solving them. Therefore, the Tao person anticipates and lives wisely, by small actions accomplishing great things.--From the Tao Te Ching

I wish I could go to Dan, too! I feel that it is a fight with my T a lot of the time. I have tried to find someone different, but everyone else seems even worse. My T has not told me at all where we are. I told her I wanted to quit and she did not seem to care much. I changed my mind because I feel as though I need someone. I think I would want to see what someone had written about me. It is interesting to get another perspective.

Yeah Dan is great...but I have hated him too. Right now I am idealizing him. He is going to piss me off sometime in the future then I will say all sorts of horrible things about him such as he never cares about me or he is in league with satan and my husband to mess me up. Yep, these are things that I have written about him in my journal. Wish I could see him as a good guy all the time, it would make therapy a whole lot easier.
Zen<font color=blue>

Deal with the difficult while it is still easy. Solve large problems when they are still small. Preventing large problems by taking small steps is easier the solving them. Therefore, the Tao person anticipates and lives wisely, by small actions accomplishing great things.--From the Tao Te Ching