I found out a lot more than I had known out west

Well I found out a lot about myself and my current friendships in comparison to the love and acceptance I received in cali. It was very clear and evident I was right everyone ****ing sucks back home and they all treat me like ****, because I'm not into their culture and that's fine, but I was miserable I couldn't connect. I didn't care and I didn't like anyone here more resented. It carried over when I went to a wedding in cali, found out how many people were so much nicer to me there and people really liked me around than back home.

I didn't felt like I had to prove anything, I didn't feel for once I didn't have to care. I came back home now, wanting to go up to everyone and just give them the birds and tell them all go **** off. I don't need any of you and you don't care if I say this, because it's better off we never see each other again.

I felt a liberal and progressive state an new atmosphere and culture of california compared to ohio was beyond helpful for me emotionally. I had a place of belonging, now I feel sorta better not so sad anymore because I have something to maintain than tolerate. It has helped my loneliness a bit, but not much when I got back I am feeling it again back in the old shoes, but now I have something to look forward to.

I found out a lot about myself and what I'm really worth and who I am. I found out this city sucks and these people my "friends" I meet in every corner here don't care what I do. They are all acquaintances some are just closer to me than they should. It's why I didn't connect. I hated everyone here I gave so many chances to see if anything would be fruitful emotionally from anyone. All I get is ignorance, stupidity and humiliation from just being not what they want me to be.

All I can do is get mad and say **** you and your life, because no one cares about your habit of wanting everyone to fall for your fake personality you shadow with addicted happiness.

But enough of that.

When do you get to go back, to cali?

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When I get a call to make music and a job offering. Anything really, I want to go back this summer. My new best friend there is a super model in the fashion industry. She's a little older than me, but a very good friend.