[NyxAngel]

I love my family, for a large portion of my life they have been the only people in it. I can count on them for nearly anything, and they are nearly always there to help. They make up the foundations of who I am. They are the rocks I beat myself upon when I make mistakes. I am destroying every relationship I have with every member of my family. They are tired of dealing with me and I can not blame them, I am tired of dealing with me, as well.

How does your mental illiness effect your familial relationships?

How do you keep from burning bridges when your life is on fire?

Any tips for mitigating the damage you do to the people around you?

[Keyslost]

I made my friend's and their families additional support. So I'm getting support from multiple people and from here. With things like these bridges do get burned otherwise you just hold it in and self-destruct. That being said you can always repair them later. You just have to be careful about how you want to handle the situation. Does this make sense? The answer is quite complicated Idk if I did it justice here or just confused the crap out of you

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by NyxAngel

I love my family, for a large portion of my life they have been the only people in it. I can count on them for nearly anything, and they are nearly always there to help. They make up the foundations of who I am. They are the rocks I beat myself upon when I make mistakes. I am destroying every relationship I have with every member of my family. They are tired of dealing with me and I can not blame them, I am tired of dealing with me, as well.

How does your mental illiness effect your familial relationships?

How do you keep from burning bridges when your life is on fire?

Any tips for mitigating the damage you do to the people around you?

this part

They are tired of dealing with me and I can not blame them, I am tired of dealing with me, as well.

in a way contradicts the idea that you're saying that you can count on them and taht they are always there to help. perhaps they always do help but that comment implies there is some resentment in you, in them or all around. The idea that you can say "I can't blame them" says to me that you have a rather low opinion of yourself and it doesn't help with relationships in which you need support from others. It puts you in a situation where you're a bit of a subordinate to others rather than equals. Unlike two equal and mutually respecting friends, where the support is never limited, or conditional nor do the two either get "tired of one's sh**"

Just because they are family does not mean they are the best fit for gaining support from.

How does your mental illiness effect your familial relationships?

it doesn't anymore. I do not deal with extended family beyond my 3 kids, two of which I am the single parent to. I would speculate that it would not be very accepted in my past family to open up to them about my issues I have had.


How do you keep from burning bridges when your life is on fire?

I don't. If the bridge only leads to pain an suffering and judgemental family... I say BURN IT DOWN!

Any tips for mitigating the damage you do to the people around you?

I would say self discovery, is a great help in understanding who you are, what you do and why you do the things that you say damage others around you. The more you know and understand yourself, regardless of if you ever have a full recovery from your issues, the more you'll be able to learn to cope with things and do things to avoid such damaging situations. Know yourself. Accept what and who you are.

[anton11415]

For me I feel the same way about my family my family is great but I have always been careful not to relie on them to much. I really keep it limited on how much I tell them cuz like you I am affraid of stessing them out. Except my one brother I talk about my problems more because we are really close and also he has bipolar disorder and anxiety too. But in general I keep my support system with friends who also have mental illnesses similar to mine.
I hope you can find friends here or other places that have similar problems to be the major support system

take care

My family is not very close. My grandmother and I comment on why that is all the time. The both of us aren't really sure why we aren't close, but that's the truth. I also feel like my mental illness has caused me to push away any close relationship my family and I could have had over the years. So, I pretty much only have my grandmother that I can really rely on. So, far she's been really wonderful about my mental illness issues. She's been very supportive. Sometimes I feel like she thinks it's as simple as just snapping out of it when I'm at my lowest points. But she's willing to listen and learn.

Perhaps, that's a part of why we aren't that close. I burned my bridges with them a long time ago. I'm not really sure. Now, it's a little better. They at least know that it's not just that I have a nasty personality...I have an illness. So that's helped to clear things up a bit. So, I guess them knowing that it's an illness not me trying to hurt them keeps the bridges whole. They have been more understanding than I give them credit for.

I would say being honest has helped a lot. Letting them know I have an illness for which I am receiving treatment helps. So they can see that I'm no just making things up. Being at least a little educated so that I can share information with them helps. That way they have all the facts about what's going on with me and can see that I am getting help. I also am working on establishing support. The support consists of friends, family, etc. These are designated people I know that I can rely on so that I'm not so disappointed if someone just doesn't get me.

[NyxAngel]

Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006

this part

in a way contradicts the idea that you're saying that you can count on them and taht they are always there to help. perhaps they always do help but that comment implies there is some resentment in you, in them or all around. The idea that you can say "I can't blame them" says to me that you have a rather low opinion of yourself and it doesn't help with relationships in which you need support from others. It puts you in a situation where you're a bit of a subordinate to others rather than equals. Unlike two equal and mutually respecting friends, where the support is never limited, or conditional nor do the two either get "tired of one's sh**"

Just because they are family does not mean they are the best fit for gaining support from.

I think I explained myself poorly this time, my apologies. None of them have said that they are sick of my s**t, I assume that they are because I can see how tired they look when I act out(?). My mother, who is Bipolar herself runs out of patience faster then she used to and snaps at me more often. Maybe I see this as them being tired of dealing with me because I do have a low opinion of myself and I'm a bit paranoid when it comes to interpersonal relationships and maybe it's other stresses in her life causing her to be short with me.

I'm sorry your extended family wouldn't be very accepting. My mother's side has a long history of mental illness, so they are a lot more accepting. I keep my father's side at arms length because I don't think they would be very accepting, either.

I would say self discovery, is a great help in understanding who you are, what you do and why you do the things that you say damage others around you. The more you know and understand yourself, regardless of if you ever have a full recovery from your issues, the more you'll be able to learn to cope with things and do things to avoid such damaging situations. Know yourself. Accept what and who you are.

This is great advice, and something I've been working on. I used to know exactly who I was and loved that person, but I haven't been her in a sure a long time that I don't know if I can find my way back to that person, or if I'm even meant to.