[WayBackWhen]

I've known my friend since like 9th or 10th grade, we're seniors now(both 17). You know when you meet someone and you just know they're a good person? Yep, I've always felt that way about him. I've always just known that he's a cool person. Back in 10th grade, his friend actually came up to me and told me that he liked me(I dont know if he asked her too because he was too shy, or she just felt as if she had to tell me), and I was shocked, because I literally had no idea. I had literally just starting dating my first bf at the time for around 2 weeks, so the timing was completely off.

Well, for a couple of months now, we've been talking a lot over FB, and im realizing just how awesome he is. He's very unique, sweet and kind (he's always been this way) he's clever, intelligent, a deep thinker, funny.... like, I love how our conversations can range from silly and funny, to really deep and stimulating...we can talk about the meaning of life and anime in the same conversation, and it's freaking beautiful lol! In my last relationship, which ended a couple of months ago, I never got that, and im realizing how much I really love being mentally stimulated..Its like the more I spoke to him, the more awesome I realized he is...

Adding to that, we have a lot of things in common. We both wanna travel one day, we both really like anime and video games, we both like art(specifically drawing, although I dont draw much anymore), both kinda introverted(tho im probably a little more introverted than he is)and I dunno...we're just so similar, and get along so weird, it's kinda weird lol

The thing is, he likes this girl, and he told me about her. The girl is soooooo pretty, and nice, and guys just love her, so I could never compare. Every time he talks about her I give him advice, but I die a little on the inside. Like I feel jealousy, but I have to act like im happy for him(which, a part of me is happy for him honestly).I dont know if she likes him back, but I dont see why she wouldn't :/ So yeah, I know he doesn't like me, or see me in that way.

I see him everyday in school, and every time we see each other, we give each other a hug and share a quick laugh before going to class. In gym, he gives me these random little hugs, and we always just gravitate towards each other to talk about random stuff lol, so it's not like I can avoid him. He'll give me compliments some days, saying that I looked really pretty and gorgeous on a particular day that I actually dressed up, did my hair and put on a little bit of makeup, so it's always nice that he notices...he's even sent me a little emoji with the hearts for eyes after saying it, but he's honestly just a friendly guy.

This whole thing sucks, and it's making me feel very sad inside. Even if we were to date, I wouldn't want to lose on of my best, closest friends, but I think he's sooooo amazing... *sigh* maybe I just have some sort of deep admiration for him as a person, and its not really romantic in nature? I dunno.

I'm pretty much just a friend to him, and I know, but I dont know if what im feeling is romantic in nature towards him or not. I've been feeling like this for around 8 months, so i dont know if it's going away or not...I kinda want it to go away, because it's just so confusing...

What do you guys think?

EDIT: And if you guys are wondering, I haven't told him about what I feel, nor have I told anyone for these past 8 months, because I want to make sure of what im feeling, and the last thing I want to do is lead him on.

[~Christina]

Ahhhh the unknown.. I know its scary.. But, best advice I can offer is tell him how you feel..Maybe he feels like he is in your " friend zone" too..

Im 43 and over 13 years ago I told my "best friend" that I loved him and he loved me back, he was feeling the same way , but not sure how to tell me.. Silly man . lol

Often the best long term relationships start as friendships first. Be brave

I agree with Christina, often the best long term relationships do start as friendships first!

To me it does sound like you have a significant crush on this guy. Tell him how you feel, there's a chance he may feel the same, and a chance he may not. In either case, you won't really know until one of you speaks up - and if he is shy, your best bet is to speak up yourself! Just say you have a crush on him, in my opinion love takes much more time to develop. See how he reacts. It will tell a lot about his character and whether he's someone worthwhile for a relationship or a friendship. And in case this is a thought you have: telling someone you have a crush on them shouldn't affect a friendship! If he's a great guy, no matter whether he is interested in a relationship with you or not, he should respond in a kind way.

[WayBackWhen]

Originally Posted by NewLyfeForReal

I agree with Christina, often the best long term relationships do start as friendships first!

To me it does sound like you have a significant crush on this guy. Tell him how you feel, there's a chance he may feel the same, and a chance he may not. In either case, you won't really know until one of you speaks up - and if he is shy, your best bet is to speak up yourself! Just say you have a crush on him, in my opinion love takes much more time to develop. See how he reacts. It will tell a lot about his character and whether he's someone worthwhile for a relationship or a friendship. And in case this is a thought you have: telling someone you have a crush on them shouldn't affect a friendship! If he's a great guy, no matter whether he is interested in a relationship with you or not, he should respond in a kind way.

Yeah I agree that it shouldn't affect our relationship in a negative way....he's a kind person, so he won't shun me or anything over it lol funny thing is is that I've described my 'type' of guy to him, and he happens to pretty much fit the bill(tho I have only had one boyfriend ever, so I'm not sure what I want 100%) and I wasn't even trying to make that happen..it just kinda did, and he said that he was flattered...I wanted to ask him the type of girl he liked, but I got shy lol im just so nervous about this, because I never tell boys that I have feelings and whatever for then, I just keep it to myself.

Ahhhh the unknown.. I know its scary.. But, best advice I can offer is tell him how you feel..Maybe he feels like he is in your " friend zone" too..

Im 43 and over 13 years ago I told my "best friend" that I loved him and he loved me back, he was feeling the same way , but not sure how to tell me.. Silly man . lol

Often the best long term relationships start as friendships first. Be brave

Thanks...I want to be brave...but I don't know how. Like, I want to get my feelings off my chest, but I don't want it to seem like im pressuring him to date me or anything of that nature...I'd just like to have a one to one talk with him about it, because I'm not sure what I feel exactly...
And may i ask...how did the relationship work out with your friend?

[avlady]

yes a crush can be exilerating!!! if he is nice i would tell him how you feel, get the courage up to let him know.good luck

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by WayBackWhen

Yeah I agree that it shouldn't affect our relationship in a negative way....he's a kind person, so he won't shun me or anything over it lol funny thing is is that I've described my 'type' of guy to him, and he happens to pretty much fit the bill(tho I have only had one boyfriend ever, so I'm not sure what I want 100%) and I wasn't even trying to make that happen..it just kinda did, and he said that he was flattered...I wanted to ask him the type of girl he liked, but I got shy lol im just so nervous about this, because I never tell boys that I have feelings and whatever for then, I just keep it to myself.

Thanks...I want to be brave...but I don't know how. Like, I want to get my feelings off my chest, but I don't want it to seem like im pressuring him to date me or anything of that nature...I'd just like to have a one to one talk with him about it, because I'm not sure what I feel exactly...
And may i ask...how did the relationship work out with your friend?

Sorry, meant to add that, been together since, married and happy

I know its scary to tell him how you feel...I wrote him a letter, It included all the reasons I loved him, his humor, his loyality etc, I told him that I would like to take our friendship to a intimate place, but I would understand and be okay if he just wanted to remain friends only... It was the longest 38 mins of my life to be honest lol

Risks much be taken in life.. Scary? Oh yesssssss ! Enjoy life and reach out and grab it.

[Yismymindblank12]

I'm in this same boat too, but I don't like many people. I am too with my female best friend. She's like you. I wish someone appreciated me like you do for him. It gives me hope, but I'm crying alot how much it's all messed up and feeling I can't live up to expectation for them. All you can do is help. I hate it now, look at my post between of my two best friends you'll know. It's hell in that situation.

[WayBackWhen]

Yismymindblank12, I'm sorry that you're going through tough time. I'll head over and read your thread.

And guys, a problems that I'm facing is whether or not I really have romantic feelings for him, or is this just platonic in nature? I'm just so confused...

[~Christina]

Do you want more physical touch from him? like holding hands, hugging,kissing? If you want more "touch" then I would say you are wanting more of a intimate relationship...

Maybe just reach out and hold his hand and make eye contact and see what he does?

[WayBackWhen]

Hmmm...well, to give an example, we were at the movies with a friend and sat next to each other. We kinda ended up sharing an arm rest, and our arms were touching...not gonna lie, I liked that, and wanted go stay like that lol but then again, that is just an innocent touch and I love physical contact...so I wonder if it really means anything.

Also, there are times when he plays with my hands and fingers, and comments on how small they are...I like that physical touch too lol but then again, those are very platonic...when it comes to kissing and stuff, I guess I kinda could imagine it with him, but a part of my brain thinks its a little weird because I've seen him as just a friend for so long...

I apologize if I'm being complicated haha

[Alone_and_Afraid]

I'm still in a relationship with my best friend. We've been together almost three years now.

[WayBackWhen]

I'm still in a relationship with my best friend. We've been together almost three years now.

Thats awesome mind telling us all how you guys met n got together? (I love stories like that haha)